I think this is the most common topic on the hsbaseballweb. Seems like I've seen it in one form or another over 50 times. Maybe 100+?
I am a parent of two Pac10/12 pitchers...who fit both categories in HS...one who was 'projectable' and the other who excelled with 'on the field performance' in HS.
Older one was a 'projectable' 6-4 RHP with a 90+ fastball. His HS W/L record was something like 18-14 (based on memory) and it drove some other parents nutty when he was recruited by nearly every school on the West Coast and beyond and signed with Stanford.
Many of the comments I overheard were similar to the ones starting this thread. Despite the fact that he is now in Triple-A, was all-Pac-10 as a senior in college, drafted 3 times (HS, junior college year and senior college year), pitched in the CWS...there is still an area opposing HS coach who tells a mutual friend that he just isn't that good.
Younger son was a 'what you see is what you get' 5-11 RHP throwing in the mid 80s. His HS W/L record was something like 24-4, was 'all district/state/American' and played on a HS team ranked #1 in the nation as a junior. None of the other parents questioned him being recruited by anyone. His choices were slimmer than the older one, but still wide enough to go to one of his 'dream schools.' Younger son pitched almost twice as many innings as older son as a freshman in college but it is questionable whether he'll ever get drafted.
But guess what? It was/is fair and just.
Each of the two took a different path to their 'dream school.' One was filled with showcases, summer travel and tons of exposure while the other relied mostly on great HS and summer coaches who believed in him.
The point is, there are paths to get there in either case...but only if you're good enough. Crying about it is useless. Find the path that fits the situation and the player.