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One thing I learned in this process...and I thought that we did all our research and due diligence...but, I never saw this come up. And, now, it seems like it's a pretty prevalent thing.

A lot of kids (most kids?) attend an in-state school. And, if you have ever looked at the difference between in-state and out of state tuition, you would understand why this happens.

But, here's a thought for those who go out of state. On the weekends, the in-state kids go home. Whether it's just to get some decent food or sleep, take a private shower, see the girlfriend, or have mom do your laundry, they do it. Doesn't matter if home is 15 minutes off campus or an hour off campus, they do it...and do it a lot.

So, for those out of state kids, who have a three, or five, or 11 hour ride home, you are stuck on a campus that's a ghost town on the weekends (in your sports offseason).

Some kids are fine with it. Others are not. And, if your kid is one that's going to feel isolated and far from home with no one to hang with, consider going to a school that's closer to home.

On my son's former school team, over 90% of the players were in-state. And, on the weekends, they mostly all went home. One kid was an hour away (each way) and my son said he would often go home on a weekday afternoon and come back that night.

And, it's just not the athletes. A ton of students in general all go home on the weekends if it's not far away.

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I would disagree Francis.  That is just small schools or northern schools.  My son practices or scrimmages every weekend during the fall so no one goes home unless you live in town.

The Southern States have a thing called Southeastern Consortium that is huge.  They agree to offset each other with majors that are not offered at a public school in their state to another state and you get instate tuition.  Still not able to get instate scholarships but you can get instate tuition.  If you look at Coastal Carolina, a huge number of their baseball players major in Marine Biology if they are out of state.  Then change their major their senior year and have to pay out of state but only for one year.

My son and probably most of the out of state guys at Tennessee are a part of it.  They change the names just a little so it is something no one else has and can use it.  My son is a Business Major but they added Governmental Environments or something like that to it so he gets instate tuition.

My son who coaches college softball at a juco also practices on fridays and saturdays all fall.  They have some who drive home after saturday but they workout again on Sunday evening so only a short break.

I love my boys, but if they were coming home every I'm guessing those that stay at school are doing something baseball productive over the weekend (around the normal college fun) while those going home, are probably just hanging out w/ old friends (which based on my view, is where a lot of "trouble" starts).

Oldest was 30 miles away playing ball.  In the fall we'd see him during fall ball, and maybe occasionally once or twice a month for dinner, and then over the holidays.  During the spring we only saw him at games.  He was too busy otherwise

Youngest is 450 miles away, and he came home for my BD in October and Christmas break.  They had Saturday morning, and Sunday evening mandatory (either practice or study hall).

They both loved the grind.

Last edited by russinfortworth

Both my kids (baseball and softball) played at out of state, state universities a long way from home. They didn’t find anything you stated to be true. Often state universities have tuition financial agreements with border states. The athletes didn’t have time to go home for the weekend. In the fall and winter football and basketball were events to attend.

I lived twenty miles from campus. I never went home for more than a meal and returned. I often took a teammate. It was because dinner stunk.

Last edited by RJM

Definitely think that's a small school thing for most of the student body.  Large schools there is always something going on and plenty of coeds to discover.  One of the reasons I went to mostly big schools.  Our son at a school of 3500 or so, started baseball practice on weekends almost from the start, after about the 3rd week.  The first few weekends he did come home to get things he forgot, etc. see the girlfriend, etc.  He had one or two weekends off after that and asked to come home (we are his only ride), we said no.  We felt, he's at school, he should be at school and not have him get used to going home all the time.  On one or two holiday monday's he did come home after practice on Saturday.  A lot of the desire to come home I'm sure was the girlfriend constantly texting if he was coming home... thank goodness for baseball.

I think the desire to be home slows down for most as they get older and establish themselves, seems house parties etc at small schools are few and far between and the students don't party like we did in the 80's.  Man, who didn't look forward to the start of the weekend Thursday Night on or off campus.  But for underclassmen who may not know "where to go" and see half the campus vacate, it's a reason to go home and see old friends or else be bored.  I think the kids would be better off if they just pushed past that and branched out their social network.

This didn't happen at my son's school either.  80% of the roster lived within an hour of school, most much closer, but they stay on campus and party, practice, lift, etc.  However, the thing about playing baseball on a predominantly local roster, as an out of stater, is that the coaches have an intimate knowledge of the local kids.  They know them personally and know their reputations, strengths, and weaknesses.   While they did recruit your son, they don't know much about him.  Additionally, 80% of the roster have played against each other for years.  The out-of-state kid is starting from scratch with everyone, more or less.  Baseball teams, though, are great - the friendships build fast, but on the diamond, your son is building his reputation from basically zero with everyone.   

*this reply is to Francis's specific scenario - when most of the roster are locals.

I agree with others, sounds like a commuter school. They go home because there is nothing to do. My daughter's stepson goes to an in state D2 in St. Augustine who plays LaCrosse.  They have practice on fall saturdays when not in season and then a lot of kids head out to the larger programs Jacksonville, FSU, UF, UCF for football, other sports or to party with friends on a Saturday night.  He doesn't like it, and plans on attending another school next fall.

Mine attended a P5 program out of state. I asked what happens when kids go home, coach said they don't except on breaks, his rules.

I myself was considering two schools, in-state, that were about 90 minutes of travel time from home. One school admitted weekends were quiet as most students went home, while the other school said...some students go home, but there's plenty that stick around. I chose the one that had people stick around and I rarely went home. Definitely something one should consider went considering a school.

As others have said this will really depend a lot on the campus. I've worked on 4 different universities and some did have a significant portion of students going home for the weekend, others not as much. I think for many of the wellknown state schools, the Big10, SEC and so on, they are more likely to have students stay over the weekend. I mean, that's when the big football games are! It is a good question to ask about the schools culture though. I wouldn't want to go in expecting one thing and getting the other.

Another thing to consider,

If ~24 players travel to away games in season (or whatever # it is now), and you are the one of the ones left behind, it can get very lonely.  One of my son's teammates joined a fraternity for this reason, even though it was discouraged by the coach and the baseball team was in many ways like a fraternity (complete with 2 baseball houses next door to each other).   

I went to a what we called a "suitcase school".  Although I lived an hour from school, I spent many weekends studying and catching up on sleep on campus.   And it just came to me, that I slept many hours in the library lol.

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