Skip to main content

29 replies

Best way to follow up on this one....?

J jbbaseball500+ posts
Son started receiving contact from very successful D1 program over the winter.
Son and Asst. Coach had regular communications all spring (via email, text, snail mail).
Both ACs have seen son play on multiple occasions. They have expreesed great interested in him. Last time they saw him play in late July, they told him they wanted him to come on an official visit in September.

Son has tried to pin them down for a specific date. My wife and I were intending on taking the visit with him (at our own expense of course). But school is flying distance away. I emailed coach explaining that I was trying to coordinate visiting while minimizing OUR out of pocket travel costs.

Coach never emailed me back, but called my son within a 1/2 hour of my email to say that he wanted to confirm availabilitiy of HC during the visit. Said he would get back to my son that next day. Still haven't heard back from AC and that was over a week ago.

As our proposed visit date is getting closer, airfare costs are rising. Would like to figure out where son stands. I am a bit concerned that either they may be stringing him along or are no longer interested.

Any suggestions if I should follow up with the coach, or continue to leave it to my son. I realize they are recruiting my son (not the parents) and that his expenses (for the most part) are covered by the school. But my wife and mines pocketbook is affected by the fact of "not knowing".

Sorry for babbling. This is our first (and most likely only) experience with recruiting.

Any thoughts on WHO should follow up (if at all)?
Original Post

Replies sorted oldest to newest

F FormerObserver1,000+ posts
Leave it to your son.

Hard to do, first time through.

The coach will visit with the parents at an appropriate time.

It is a very busy time for the coaches, especially the head coach.

Coordinating all the official visits with visits with the head coach keeps them very busy.

Let your son communicate with them.

He can call them and get an update.

Let him take the official visit alone if necessary then maybe schedule another family trip later.

The distance is one thing that you need to consider if you would like to see your son play often.
Last edited by FormerObserver
B Bee>1,000+ posts
quote:
by TPM: If it were my situation, I would not be waiting for the phone call.
Appears to me, they are awaiting someone else's decision before they can committ to you.
agree with the above ... many coaches handle communicating it much better than you have experienced -

some might consider the communcation breakdown a sign of things to come even if a visit is eventually taken, here's hoping that in your case it is not

disagree with FO, a recruiting co-ordinator & coaching staff who is overwhelmed by recruiting & visit details is bumbling - run away fast if that's the case!

have they requested transcripts?

quote:
by FO: The coach will visit with the parents at an appropriate time
it doesn't get any more appropriate than on the O visit Confused

parents don't always go along on visits, but it would be very unusual for the school to discourage it .. & btw, they can/would pick up the tab for your lodging, game tickets, and meals w/coaches
Last edited by Bee>
justbaseballjustbaseball10,000+ posts
quote:
some might consider the communcation breakdown a sign of things to come even if a visit is eventually taken...


That is the way I would read it.

quote:
Appears to me, they are awaiting someone else's decision before they can committ to you.


I would agree with that too.

Given that I was a "rookie" during our recruiting process...I was always a bit hestitant to ask the nagging questions in the back of my mind. If we get a second go-around on this recruiting thing with a younger son, I will not be so hesitant. Better to know the truth IMO. Better to hear a tough answer than to wonder I think.

"Coach, do we need to wait on this because of another player you are recruiting ahead of my son?"

Knowing I would be risking some uncomfortable times, I'd still ask it and it still might not change my viewpoint on that school. Would just want to know.
Last edited by justbaseball
F FormerObserver1,000+ posts
quote:
they can/would pick up the tab for your lodging, game tickets, and meals w/coaches


Bee, they can provide air transportation to the student only.

The airfare was in question here.

Driving would be a possibility.

Yes, this time of the year they are considering a number of possibilities just like the recruits are.

So, if you like the really like the school hang on, if not, move on.
Last edited by FormerObserver
TPMTPMHSBaseballweb Member since 2003
If you drive your son, you are reimburshed miledge. If you fly, it's your dime, they are allowed to pay for parents meals and lodging.

All schools who asked my son to visit officially did so in enough time that we could make travel arrangments in needed. The flights were still very expensive. This became a big decision for us and son in where he might eventually end up. He turned down 3 out of state visits. If my son had not gotten the large scholarship opportunity that he did, he most likely would have remained in state.

You have a choice, move on or pay the flight at the last minute when they call.

I understand flights are expensive, this is something to consider in recruiting for out of state. If you are not willing to pay the extra expense to go with your son and make sure (for your own self) that this is a good fit (you are writing the checks) do know that in 4 years you will own a credit card company for transportation costs for you and him (make sure you get one with points). Eek

Parents will spend lots of money getting their kids seen (showcases, tourneys, camps), improve their game (lessons) but stingy on somethings in regards a very important decision.

JMO.
TRhitTRhit10,000+ posts
You can also stay home and listen on the internet radio---then there are no expenses---I never attended one college game of my sons---it was one day in the air out and one day in the air back---it wasn't the expense but the time involved---I was not retired at the time---

Listening on the radio was just as exciting and I also had the youngest son still at home
B Bee>1,000+ posts
quote:
by FO: it is a very busy time for the coaches, especially the head coach .. this time of the year they are considering a number of possibilities just like the recruits are
sorry ya came to a fork in the road & are heading folks down the wrong one Smile
a very busy time would be February - if you're getting bad communication - or not the promissed communication, it's not because they are overwhelmed

of course, if a last minute visit offer comes, parents could as you suggest visit coach and campus at a later date -
HOWEVER, the intent of the O visit is for coach to SELL his University, program, staff, facilities, current players, & local community to the recruit & family -
and for parent(s) meet the coach in a relaxed setting, and ask questions. after youv'e already "bought the cow" questions and dialog w/coach, staff, & school that would aid you in advising your son are usless .. he's committed & signed


and when could one arrainge this "later visit"? (rhetorical)

coach will be selling other visiting recruits/parents til nli date
then dead period
then Thanksgiving with his fam
then school's out
then some PG event
then Christmas with his fam
then some other PG event
then New Years with the fam
then school begins
then practice begins
then season begins
TPMTPMHSBaseballweb Member since 2003
quote:
Originally posted by TRhit:
You can also stay home and listen on the internet radio---then there are no expenses---I never attended one college game of my sons---it was one day in the air out and one day in the air back---it wasn't the expense but the time involved---I was not retired at the time---

Listening on the radio was just as exciting and I also had the youngest son still at home


We stayed home and listened and watched on teh internet and on TV. It's not the same. Our son was very good about understanding usnot being around when he chose to go far away, but we know those visits made a difference.
Like Dad04, our son's scholarship commitment helped offset our travel.

That wasn't the point. Attending out of state has it's costs. And personally though I know it was his decision, we and he felt it was important for all of us to make the visit.

Coaches ask parents on official visits for a reason.
J jbbaseball500+ posts
"Coach, do we need to wait on this because of another player you are recruiting ahead of my son?"

I GREATLY appreciate everyone's feedback!!!

I really like the question above. Would I be correct in assuming you are suggesting I make this call over my son? I think this is an excellent question, but one that MAY be more appropriate for my son to ask.......

A bit more background.....I went with my son on an unofficial visit to the campus back in April. So I have seen the campus, baseball facilities and met the AC's. I don't really NEED to go. My wife would like to check things out, though. For some reason, I would like to meet the HC though. Look him in the eye. I can tell a lot that way, IMHO.

Also, we have a "minor" logistical issue. My son is a 2 sport athlete, he plays football. The issue of flying is primarily driven by the fact he plays on Friday night, fly out Saturday early AM, head back Sunday (about an 8 hour drive to campus from our house).
Last edited by jbbaseball
F FormerObserver1,000+ posts
quote:
It is a very busy time for the coaches, especially the head coach.

Coordinating all the official visits with visits with the head coach keeps them very busy.


This is what I said, Bee.

Nothing about being overwhelmed.

quote:
Yes, this time of the year they are considering a number of possibilities just like the recruits are.


I just don't see the fork in the road.
Last edited by FormerObserver
infielddadinfielddad10,000+ posts
jbbaseball,
I think FO and Bee> could both justify their positions on whether the coaching staff is jammed right now or is posturing with plenty time on their hands.
What I do think is very true is that the way your son is treated during the recruiting process should be considered a very strong indicator of how he will be treated as part of a program. Many of us are so happy our son is being recruited, or the school/program involved, that we tend to overlook or minimize some of the issues in the process. I can certainly accept that a coach commits to do something and misses once. More than that should be more than a hint.
On parents visiting schools with the recruit, that choice varies widely. Our son visited on his own and made a great choice. Our daughter was a nationally recruited athlete who also visited on her own. She also made a great choice in schools. However, it turned out her coach had some personal issues that impacted the entire group of recruits and the program. In retrospect, I don't think any parent would have appreciated those potentials.
If we had it to repeat, I am confident my wife and I would still have our children make the recruiting trips, absent some compelling reason to do otherwise.
TRhitTRhit10,000+ posts
For one thing he wanted to go on his own

For a second thing I would have been in the way---he would be with the team the full 48 hrs---where would I be ?--walking the campous or in my hotel room

The coaches had already discussed with me the particulars of the offer---it was made when they called him to invite him for the visit---so there was no need for me to be there


That is why not!!!! But it is different strokes for different folks
justbaseballjustbaseball10,000+ posts
Your "!!!!" reads like you're a little irritated?

I wasn't arguing with you...just wondering why you thought that.

Your answer sounds like an explanation of why you did not go. Fair enough. I've got no problem with your reason for not going.

I was wondering if you had a reason for parents in general to not go? Your original statement said (in part) "...I do not like to see parents on the official visits..."

We went on one of our son's official visits, but not all. I enjoyed it...we got to see the campus, stayed out of our son's way about 90% of the time and had a nice dinner and a nice breakfast one-on-one with the coach. I'm glad we did it. I wish I had gone to more.
Last edited by justbaseball
infielddadinfielddad10,000+ posts
justbb, I realize, after some additional thought, that there probably is a compelling reason for parent participation on a visit.
With the new NCAA rules on graduation, GPA, graduation/unit progress, financial limits and transfer rules, it would be quite difficult for a student athlete in the midst of a recruiting visit to grasp the issues and consequences. This is especially true since athletic aide can be joined with other aid to reach the 25%.
Those changes alone would warrant being on campus and talking with coaches.
With a staff of the type possibly described in this thread who may have been less than disciplined in follow up with a recruit, that could be another compelling reason.
P puma1500+ posts
Every situation and family is different. While this website gives great advice, it is necessary for the individual to figure out what scenario best suits themselves. We went on both sons official visits. When he left with the team to do "his thing" we checked out the campus, city etc. Would not have sent my only child off somewhere, sight unseen...what a better time to check it all out???
observer44observer441,000+ posts
.
I'm all for players going on their own. IMO official visits are not numbers and details visits but pure emotional and "feel" visits. The player really needs to feel what it is going to be like away from home with these coaches in this new community with these players. As long as mom and dad are present there will always be a sense of false security and dependence, not independence. If I need to go, fine but not during HIS trip.

Cool 44
.
Last edited by observer44
TPMTPMHSBaseballweb Member since 2003
On both recruiting trips the only time we saw our son was at mealtime.
We had never met any of the coaches but one that was recruting our son or been to the campus's that he had seen while playing baseball that summer. Ours felt it was important for us to meet them all. He was 17, he wanted our input. Changes or not and mature as he was, we'd do it all over again.

Both visits were different experiences. Not only for us but for son.

I think if we had not gone to Clemson, we would have talked him out of going out of state because his offer in state was so large he got back pocket change. That was very luring. In the few times we were with him, we watched our son interact with coaches and future teammates and that was an eye opener in seeing the differences.

Regardless, we were glad we were there for the closed door meeting with the head coaches.

I suppose that it is an individual issue between players and their families.

But maybe, that is why the transfer rate is so high.
Last edited by TPM
B brod100+ posts
I agree with TRhit - Let him go on the official visit, and you can stay at home. He can phone you and tell you everything, and not sign a thing. It is a wonderful thing to see the growth of your son during the recruiting process.

I also don't think you need to call to confirm something you already should know. They ARE recruiting several players at his position. Some MAY be more highly rated than your son, and they MAY intend to make offers to them first. Your visit MAY be contingent upon that. So what? This is true for all but a handful of recruited players.

I get the sense that you aren't pursuing other opportunities either in state or closer to home. Surely there must be other schools that may be a good fit for your son? Recruiting is a process, not unlike a job search. You have to have more than a few leads to land the job you want. By all means do not give up on this school, but be patient, and keep your options open, as you will have to deal with the 'travel" issue each holiday, baseball season and summer break.
justbaseballjustbaseball10,000+ posts
I'm kind of dumbfounded about the turn this thread has taken. jbbaseball didn't ask whether or not he should go on the visit with son...jbbaseball asked about how to follow up based on some spotty contact.

Go? or Don't-go? No "right" answer as best I can tell. On that question jbbbaseball should do what jbbaseball and jbbaseball jr. want to do. How can we answer that question?

To each his own!
Last edited by justbaseball
J jbbaseball500+ posts
Just want to follow up on Brod's comment. Agree with you 100% on the issue of pursuing opportunities closer to home/in-state. But the key is (IMHO) that needs to be my son, not me.

Good news is that we had a bit of a heart to heart today and he has followed up on several in-state leads. I realize some kids are ahead a bit on the maturity issue. Good, bad or indifferent, I want him to be doing the contacting, pursuing, following up. He is the one going to college now, not me.

I was happy to see the activities he accomplished today. And that was in the middle of getting ready for the football season opener this Friday.

Again, appreciate all of your comments.
(BTW, he did contact the school in question today. Had to leave a message). Guess we'll see how quickly the call is returned......................

Add Reply

Post

Membership Required

We're sorry. You must be signed in to continue. Sign In or Register
×
Are you sure you want to remove from your Block List?
×
Loading...
×
When you block a person, they can no longer invite you to a private message or post to your profile wall. Replies and comments they make will be collapsed/hidden by default. Finally, you'll never receive email notifications about content they create or likes they designate for your content.
Note: if you proceed, you will no longer be following .
×
Advanced Search
Advanced Search
Link copied to your clipboard.
×