Coach Situation

Stay positive... Hopefully puberty kicks in this summer and he gains strength and size... Junior and Senior years are ahead... Again, stay positive... 

Best of luck!

Assuming your son isn't asking when he goes in aka .... pestering....it sounds like coach continues to encourage him. Being ignored would be more worrisome. 

As a HS coach, I can tell you that the most difficult year for almost all athletes is the soph year. Especially those who get bumped to varsity. My son went through it in both baseball and football. There is, for most athletes, a very significant difference in overall strength and athleticism as they move on to junior and senior seasons. Hard to be patient but for most but the physiological changes that take place from soph to jr to sr year, will improve performance along with opportunities.

He is a physically underdeveloped soph who was chosen to be part of a varsity program.  He is getting daily reps and intersquad with varsity players and varsity coaches.  He is being submersed in the varsity experience, seeing first hand on a daily basis what the opposition quality is, the level of play, the tactics, tendencies, etc.  This experience is invaluable for him for the next few years when he is hopefully competing for varsity playing time.  While the lack of game innings is undoubtedly frustrating, there is a good deal of positive going on and that is where his (and your) focus should be.

If it were my son, this is what I would advise him to do...  First, try to find out if the coach ever moves players down for a game or two to get innings.  If so, ask for a few moments of the coach' time after practice.  Acknowledge full appreciation for being chosen to be part of the varsity team.  Ask if he thinks it would be possible to join jv for a game or two to get game innings so he can put all his hard work and learning to the test.  

If not, he is still getting all the benefits I listed and he can get his game innings in the summer and next season.

GameDayToday posted:

Assuming your son isn't asking when he goes in aka .... pestering....it sounds like coach continues to encourage him. Being ignored would be more worrisome. 

No he has never asked anything except how he can improve. I never thought of it that way but he isn’t ignored so that is positive 👍🏼

My son has dealt with this.  He has always played infield as well as pitched.  He is a strong hitter.  This year as a sophomore, put on Varsity as a PO.  Doesn't even get to take reps infield.  We have an extremely strong team, so I don't think he has earned a fielding position, but would like him to get reps during practice.  He told me he thinks he has gotten worse this year.  Lack of play time and reps and shagging balls during practice.  He did ask, halfway through the season, to play on JV if he is not pitching and the coach has let him do it.  He smiles and looks like he enjoys baseball again.  It was a good move for him.

I guess I'd question why he was moved up to Varsity and getting absolutely no time....even in games that aren't close.  Has he played JV too....or just sat on Varsity?   I'm not sure why a coach would keep a kid on Varsity if he has no intentions of using him (which seems to be the case here).   Also don't see why a kid hitting .100 is still playing this late in the season, but that's just me   

The situation is 5'10" 120 pounds.   Did I read that correctly?  Get that kid on a weight training program.   5'10" 140 is skinny as a rail.  20 pounds less than that?

Buckeye's post reminds me of a few additional points...

Do not compare your son to another with poor numbers as the reason he should play more.  He should play more if and when he is prepared to step in and compete and help the team.  That is what he should continue to work toward.  We are 20 games into our season.  I have a kid hitting .111 but when I have to move another starting IF to the bump, he is clearly the best defensive sub to put in and keep our tight defense in tact.  There are reasons kids play/don't play.  It is easy for a parent to point to a number to suggest otherwise.  When a parent does so, it is almost always biased.  I also have a few kids hitting low .200's that play a whole lot more than a few that have higher numbers.  Those playing are clearly better players and are victims of the small sample size that is HS baseball stats.  There isn't a kid in the program that would argue who puts the team in a better position to win.

One of those other players has not received the playing time I had hoped for and has not progressed at the rate I anticipated.  Still, he is clearly a better player than other options that are viable to bring up from JV.  He is a kid we can compete with if we have to make that substitution.  There are times when I have him (and others) get up and warm up in anticipation of a particular set of events playing out.  I will tell him (them) to get ready as a position player - you may go in next inning.  Often, these events do not play out in that direction and he ends up heading back to the bench for the rest of the game.   I know it is difficult for the player when this happens repeatedly.  But it is often circumstance and proper preparedness by the coaches, not misleading deception.  I can't argue with the OP on why he hasn't been put in during blowouts.  Maybe the coach has six or eight others in the same situation and couldn't get them all in.  Point is it is certainly not the intention, in most cases, for a coach to bring a player to V with no intention of playing him at all.  Circumstance is always a big factor.  The best thing the player can do is continue to get so much better that he takes circumstance out of the equation.  

Why have a sophomore on varsity if he is not playing? Is there a JV 

NEBase posted:

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I don't know the situation all that well but by being at every practice and every game your son should know whether he should be in the lineup in some capacity or if he's one of the lesser players on the team. Ask your son honestly and if it's the former go up to the coach after practice alone and tell him "I don't expect to start right now, but what are some things you want to see me doing to earn some playing time? There are some other kids struggling right now playing more than me and I think I can help contribute here and there if given the opportunity."  

 

...

I strongly suggest you do not use this part.  That can blow up on you in a hurry.  The rest of NEBase' post is solid.

cabbagedad posted:

Buckeye's post reminds me of a few additional points...

Do not compare your son to another with poor numbers as the reason he should play more.  He should play more if and when he is prepared to step in and compete and help the team.  That is what he should continue to work toward.  We are 20 games into our season.  I have a kid hitting .111 but when I have to move another starting IF to the bump, he is clearly the best defensive sub to put in and keep our tight defense in tact.  There are reasons kids play/don't play.  It is easy for a parent to point to a number to suggest otherwise.  When a parent does so, it is almost always biased.  I also have a few kids hitting low .200's that play a whole lot more than a few that have higher numbers.  Those playing are clearly better players and are victims of the small sample size that is HS baseball stats.  There isn't a kid in the program that would argue who puts the team in a better position to win.

 

Excellent point....I guess my statement was more based on the fact that it said "batting .100 and continues to start". It makes it sound like he has been a longtime starter this season......which is different than your reasoning where you may use a kid with a .100 average in certain situations, which does make sense.     My thought was that  with 2 weeks left in the year, it says that this kid is playing no matter what.  I just have a hard time believing you can keep a kid batting .100 in the lineup even if he's a top defensive guy. 

cabbagedad posted:

 ...Those playing are clearly better players and are victims of the small sample size that is HS baseball stats. 

I loved using stats to help my kid to get better and it made a nice addendum to the photobook. But sadly, I have seen others use it as a "smoking gun" to convince the coach their darlin HoFer should be leading off every game.

3and2Fastball posted:

The situation is 5'10" 120 pounds.   Did I read that correctly?  Get that kid on a weight training program.   5'10" 140 is skinny as a rail.  20 pounds less than that?

3and2Fastball posted:

The situation is 5'10" 120 pounds.   Did I read that correctly?  Get that kid on a weight training program.   5'10" 140 is skinny as a rail.  20 pounds less than that?

Yes he is very skinny. Genetics and high metabolism. I am pushing a lot of protein and calories down him and he conditions. He can lift his body weight right now. Is there a weight training program or any other ideas that might help put weight on him ? 

Contact the Strength & Conditioning Coordinator of  the D1 University closest to your location and ask for recommendations for a qualified strength trainer.

Never rip other players who play. It’s the quick route to a bad reputation as a parent. Chances are his weight/build is an issue with the coach. Your son will fill out eventually. Since he has a summer baseball schedule he’s better off practicing with the varsity than playing JV. The coach can see him developing.

A coach should never tell a player he’s going to play unless he’s going to start him. Circumstances change over the course of the game. Is your son confusing “might go in” with “will go in?” After a few “might go ins” it may be snow balling in his mind.

3and2Fastball posted:

The situation is 5'10" 120 pounds.   Did I read that correctly?  Get that kid on a weight training program.   5'10" 140 is skinny as a rail.  20 pounds less than that?

My son was 5’11” 135 as a freshman. When it got windy they tied him to the second base anchor so he could play short without blowing away.

We joked we needed a glass door for the fridge. After growing he started eating like a hound. A year later he was 6’ 160. He gulped down whey loaded shakes daily. 

RJM posted:

Never rip other players who play. It’s the quick route to a bad reputation as a parent. Chances are his weight/build is an issue with the coach. Your son will fill out eventually. Since he has a summer baseball schedule he’s better off practicing with the varsity than playing JV. The coach can see him developing.

A coach should never tell a player he’s going to play unless he’s going to start him. Circumstances change over the course of the game. Is your son confusing “might go in” with “will go in?” After a few “might go ins” it may be snow balling in his mind.

I am not ripping another player apart just simply stating some numbers. The coach treats my son great off the field and seems to be a very good person. Coach has told him he would play as “you are going in the next inning.” We took two out of town trips because the coach said he would be needed and he would play. $1,000 later he heard the words but never saw the field. I understand what you are saying but as an education and psychology major I feel telling anyone you are going to do something and not follow through is also the quickest way to lose respect. 

RJM posted:

3and2Fastball posted:

The situation is 5'10" 120 pounds.   Did I read that correctly?  Get that kid on a weight training program.   5'10" 140 is skinny as a rail.  20 pounds less than that?

My son was 5’11” 135 as a freshman. When it got windy they tied him to the second base anchor so he could play short without blowing away.

We joked we needed a glass door for the fridge. After growing he started eating like a hound. A year later he was 6’ 160. He gulped down whey loaded shakes daily. 

Thank you for the advice. I am going to look into the whey shakes as well as the D1 strength and conditioning coordinator bc we actually live not too far from a D1. He is using a dietician but it hasn’t helped much so far. His doctor said he is a late bloomer. 

My3sons* posted:

My oldest son is almost 16, a sophomore in High School, and LOVES playing baseball. He is 5’10 and 120 lbs. He is obviously skinny for his age and is not a standout player. He is a super talented consistent player with a very good glove and arm.   He can play every position well, pitch 75mph with a great curve and knuckle ball,  played travel ball, rec ball, and a starter in middle school.  His coach moved him to Varsity this year continuing to tell him lines like, “You are going in next inning,” “I need your knuckle ball next game” or “Be ready. However he is one of two players who have never played one time, not even in a scrimmage or when we are way up in score!  This is the number one magnet school in the State and is well known for academics not athletics.  The season only has a few weeks left. He is an overly respectful kid, straight A’s, works with a dietician trying to gain weight,  and attends every single conditioning/practice arriving early and staying late. He recently asked the coach what he could do to improve his game and was told he needed more strength. He has started working on that but His coach plays a lot of kids similar in size and strength and plays freshman over seniors that are similar in skill. One sophomore had 3 consecutive strikeouts batting .100 and continues to start while another senior rides the bench alot. Since it is high school I feel he should handle this issue, But I also do not like the coach continuing to tell him he is “going in” and he never does. He leaves a lot of games crushed bc he was told he would get an opportunity and didn’t. I think if he just got an inning here or there that would help tremendously.   He will be playing travel this summer and works hard on his own. I am concerned with him finishing high school with a positive baseball experience. Any suggestions?

Thanks everyone for some amazing advice! I really appreciate it bc I have two great athletes and don’t know how to approach a lot of this athletic stuff with coaches. I gave My son several of the suggestions and the advice about politely asking coach if he could play some JV. He went and asked after school today and The coach said he could play the next few weeks with JV. So win-win!!!! Thanks!!!

I can kind of relate, just a few differences. My 2021 is 5'10" 170ish and was starting varsity at the beginning of the season at a position he had never even practiced at on a decent team. We are 8-3 right now. He also was number 3 in pitching rotation. His pitching has been the highlight, so far 15innings, 25ks, 2.40 era. His velo is in low-mid 80s consistently. Not bad numbers for a freshman and I am proud of that. He is 2-1 and his loss was on the bad end of a 1-0 game.  He had an 0-3 at the plate game a few games back. There were about 7 others that had that same 0-3 as we only had 2 hits as a team. My boy has not seen the field defensively since except JV. He was not told a reason, nor had he made a error at his position. Now he has tanked. He cant even hit in his JV at bats. He was always our 3-4 hitter coming into this year and hit for a great deal of power. He is currently batting .100 when you combine varsity and JV at bats. No extra base hits. He even asked when we can move as he seems to be checking out. He is pretty mentally strong and handles stress fairly well. Very concerning. It seems even when he is pitching the coach is at another level yelling from dugout at him whether it is a strike or a ball. It is starting to look a little more like bullying than coaching. So if your coach is being positive, then that is a plus. I have to keep in perspective that mine is only a freshman. But they are completely playing with his confidence, and I worry that they may be pushing him away a bit. He is starting to talk about doing more football stuff this summer, so the writing is on the wall. The only good thing is that he plays for a very good summer travel program that may be able to put the parts back together.   It is going to be a long 4 years. my3sons, I hope your boy gets to see the field before the end of season. Maybe he can prove that he belongs for good. Keeping these younger kids confident can only be a good thing for the next few years.

I've seen players who were prematurely moved up to Varsity before, and did nothing but sit on the bench besides the odd pinch running stint. Not a fan of it...as far as I'm concerned, if a coach picks him for the team then he should play him at least once in a while. 

 Sounds like your son's love of the game is being tested. It happens to almost everyone, in one way or another.

There really isn't a lot he can do but stay ready, and stay positive.