Don’t be that guy, part 2

I thought the kid was in fact safe. I hope that coach is permanently banned from every youth sporting event and faces criminal charges. Do umps make bad calls? All the time. I'd rather have a bad ump than no ump.

I’ve been on this baseball dad journey for roughly 22 years – way more than I deserve, and it’s been an interesting ride.

I’ve seen a parent assault an official over an 8-year-old girl not making it to the starting block in a swim meet. The official was thrown into the pool and the father left the meet in cuffs in front of his 8-year-old.  I know 2 dads whom I like both, one with a kid who’s a superstar in the show, the other whose son is knocking at the door in AAA that fought on the field when their kids where in 10U. Both were banned from USSSA for a period. There are conflicting stories on the why, so I won’t comment other to say that even good people can make bad choices when lizard brain emotions surrounding offspring surface. So certainly, don’t be that guy/gal or that coach in the video.

I know parents that dreamed bigger than their kids’ achievements, parents that exaggerated how their kids were doing at every level, parents that were their kids biggest and most obnoxious fans. Of those parents I still know, all those young men are still weekly if not daily parts of those parents’ lives through phone, texts, or as active grandparents.

I know parents that overdrove their kids, who after their son went o’fer made them take BP until the blisters made it impossible to play for the remaining weekend. Parent’s whose kids have never fished or had a proper vacation because baseball was that important. Parent’s that would sit and talk about the kids and parents on the team that didn’t belong at this level and how delusional those parents were, parents with a need to qualify and quantify why their kids where better. The few young men I know that lived this type of baseball upbringing love their parents but won’t be repeating cycle if their future kids are athletes. I also doubt if some will let the grandparents or a specific grandparent take future junior to practice alone.

Obviously, we’re talking extremes here, but we’ve all bragged a bit too much about our kids’ successes, we’ve all not handled our kid’s failures perfectly. Being a successful parent looks different to each of us, but I’m going to fall back on the “cast the first stone” axiom. If were just talking about bragging/exaggerating then I'm going cut that guy/gal some some slack...

Parents don’t understand how much this freaks out the kids.

In 9/10 rec baseball I (opposing coach) stood between a dad coach and a 13yo umpire after a game while the dad tried to get at the kid. The stuff he was saying was atrocious. A lot of kids started crying.

Later that evening I called the guy. He was a friend. I asked him if he was out of his mind. He committed assault.

He told me his wife, a child psychologist professor already told him his out of his mind he was at high decibels about two inches from his face for a half hour. She did to him what he did to the kid umpire.

I advised him to call the league and youth sports board presidents before the kid umpire’s parents decide to have him arrested.

This guy was a friend. He was a great guy. What I found out was he had a bad temper when he reached the tipping point.

The 13yo umpire was brutal that game. But going after an umpire is never excusable. Especially a kid umpire.

I walked off the field one time in the middle of a rec game when the opposing coach went after one of our high school baseball players who was umpiring. The kid literally looked like he was scared for his life.    I dialed 911 and told him he had 30 seconds to get off the field or I was calling the police. When he went off the field I took my players off the field and walked away with my players and parents. I knew that was the only way for the board to have to deal with either him.   They got onto me for walking off in the middle of a game but removed him from ever coaching in that league again.

Sadly several years ago I had to witness a 10 year old player and his mom trying to restrain their drunk dad/husband who was built like a defense end from assaulting an umpire and a coach who was trying to calm him down with reason. The police was called and the drunk dad sped off in his car, yikes. Never saw the family again after that incident. I wish these incidents were very rare but the outrage has now been reduced to just shaking one's head and maybe an expulsion.

Love that GC live stream is going to help capture these morons on video.   The dads are usually the idiots but I’ve Seen plenty of unstable moms in the stands over the years.  

Terrible. No excuse. And the kid was safe.