I had originally put this in the 9th inning sr year, but decided to start a new thread in keeping with the theme of the post!
Eavery day is a new day - fresh, with no mistakes -or something like that - from Anne of Avonlea...
In 2006, my oldest daughter moved from CA to Purdue in West Lafeyette, IN. Three weeks before, we shipped five or six big boxes to her dorm via UPS. She got on the airplane the day before orientation started, flew herself back there and got in very late at night after all the "move in helpers" had gone home. So she took the shuttle from Indianapolis, marched herself and her two big suitcases up to the dorm, found her room and the next day started settling in.
I felt pretty bad about not going with her, but that's the way she wanted it. Family day came and went, by then she was in a sorority and the big sisters were her family for the day (very nice).
Her roommate turned out to be horrible, and classes were hard to understand when the teachers couldn't speak English (only 2 classes), but she persevered. We never had a "why did I do this call" but there were a few that were close.
Why am I telling you this? Because from my limited experience, I have learned that there is a fine line between the excitement of going away and the panic of going away. Every one needs to stay on the excitement side, and stay positive. What they tell you in the little brochure about staying positive when making the transition and during phone calls home is true. It may be one of the most difficult things to do, but the truth is your child will still need you to say - hey you're going to be okay, you can do this because that's the kind of person you are. I found that asking questions like what was the best thing that happened TODAY - and what interesting people have you met - are better than just how are you..... gets them thinking about the positives of their situation. Remind them at the end of the conversation that next time you talk, you'll be anxious to hear about what they are learning at class, the funniest thing that happened in the cafeteria, and how beautiful the campus is in the fall. Set up the next conversation - prepare them for success.
THen when you hang up, you'll feel better too, knowing that even though they probably won't realize it until they are sending their own kids off, you have helped them get through a life changing experience, and made it interesting and exciting.
I can say all of this because I moved from MN to CA right after I graduated from the U of M (go Gophers, MN Mom! ) and I left my whole family (including a very old mom and dad). My mom did all these things, and said all these things to me, and of course, I didn't appreciate it fully until I sent my daughter off.
I don't know any of you well, but from reading the posts for the past year, I can tell that your sons love you all, and would bet they appreciate everything you have done and do for them. Krak, I am sure Krak JR understands your situation. He will call and be concerned more about your safe trip home than you missing the breakfast. Will he miss you being there? Of course, but perhaps it will be him who is a strong friend and example for someone else on the team.
Before they go off, just remind your kids to "be a good friend and a good student, try your hardest every day, and sleep well knowing you've had a great day". That's been our motto since kindergarten.
As for us, my son is staying home this year to go to Fresno City, which presents a somewhat similar but yet totally different set of circumstances, and I would love to hear from other websters about how they successfully made that work. I am really good now at the go far away from home situation, and I want to be really good at the stay close situation!
Everyone have a great end of summer - enjoy those last barbeques and good luck freshmen parties you're goign to throw. Life is about to change big time - kind of like when those little guys were born!
Have fun!
PS And yes, my daughter is happily packing stuff up to return to Purdue this fall. She took a year off to serve as FFA state pres and is READY to BOILER UP for her soph year. She's even hoping to become a scorekeeper for the baseball team!
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