Getting all the wrong signs

Get used to it as it will happen all through your life and you have to learn how to deal with these situations. If you dont have passion for the game and you want to let the coach know that you don't have it, quit. If you want to make a point and prove he's wrong, stick it out, find your weaknesses, and work on them. The coach may be holding you back but right now, but you are also fighting yourself. I will bet your attitude is being worn on your sleeve, and that is not good for you or your team.

In a very politically correct way ask him what you have to work on in order to get a shot. Put him on a spot

quote:

Coach continues to play a guy I know I am better then,the people in the stands know Im better then,and most of all,my teammates know Im better then.

I'll give you the same advice I gave my son. The best players will play. If you are not currently playing, get better. I told him, it doesn't matter what I think, he thinks, or what anyone else thinks. Right now, one guy thinks the other catcher is better and that is all that matters RIGHT NOW. Does that mean in the future? No, that merely means right now. If the catcher is that inept, even an inept coach can figure that out over time (not suggesting your coach is inept).

Bottom line - stride to improve, cheer on ALL your teammates, and be ready for your opportunity which ALWAYS comes in baseball. Injuries, poor play, summer vacations, etc., etc.

Also, try and see things from the other person's point of view to help you channel the internal anger into a positive force. Why? Imagine you were named the starter over these past four games. Would you want someone seething on the bench when you were in there? Would you want the coach to yank you after a few bad games? or Would you tell yourself, "Gee, I know I am the best catcher, I hope the coach sticks with me for a few more games so I can show him my abilities." Always try and put yourself in the other person's shoes. Maybe the coach has sensed an entitlement attitude out of you and he is going to teach you a thing or two - from the bench.

Get better, wait your turn, and PRODUCE when you are called. It is very hard to produce with all that rage inside. Let that burden go, and it will all work out for you

Please read and re-read what rz1 and ClevelandDad have written for you. It is very good advice.

Stop talking about it with your teammates...those conversations will only increase your frustration and there are very few friends in the world who will not tell you what they think you want to hear. Talk directly with your coach and listen to what he has to say.

future...Unless this is the only team that you can play on, I would quit and go play for someone else.

The politically correct way to do things is to sit and wait for your turn. However, your turn may never come with this coach.

You are seen by no one when you are sitting on the bench. You learn very little by not playing.

Happened to me one time and that one time was enough. Went to play for another team and it was a BLAST!

When you give up your summers, i.e., weekends, to play baseball, you should enjoy it.

Beenthere - I might agree with you, but from his post it sounds like this is his HS coach...which makes it a different story altogether IMO.

Don't quit. If you go to another team and run into the same situation, will you quit there too. And so on. Stay in there and work hard.

Don't open your mouth about it to the team. Think, how can I best serve the team in the current situation. Asking the coach what you need to improve on to get a shot is great advice. Let him know you want it, but don't let him know you are upset by this LEARNING experience.

JMO - Tim

Always beat the other guy to practice. Always. Not out of spite, but because it's what you need to do.

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Beenthere - I might agree with you, but from his post it sounds like this is his HS coach...which makes it a different story altogether IMO.

I also interpreted it the same way as justtbb - it was the high school coach.

Even if it were just a summer team, the grass is not always greener. First they have only played five games thus far so his opportunity might be right around the corner. Double headers are common in the summer so he should get some opportunity to shine. Lastly, unless some team recruits him, why is he going to magically wind up as the starter on some other team? There is logic in not rotting on the bench all summer, but quitting may cause more harm than good at this point.

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Originally posted by ClevelandDad:
The best players will play.

Someone making that statement has either been incredibly blessed in their experiences and hasn't seen much, or is incredibly naieve.

It doesn't always happen, for a variety of reasons, and that is a fact. {This world is not fair.} And when it doesn't happen, it produces the kind of frustration this young man is expressing.

There has been much sound advice offered to the young man. He needs to approach the coach respectfully, asking what he needs to do to earn playing time. Then he needs to honestly evaluate the answer he received.

If he gets a "non-answer", the problem becomes very difficult.

If he gets a valid answer, then he knows what to work on.

He should try his best to continue supporting his team.

But if we old folks would think back to this age, perhaps we might not be quite so hard on him. He is honestly expressing his feelings to us. That doesn't mean he is expressing them in the dugout.

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Someone making that statement has either been incredibly blessed in their experiences and hasn't seen much, or is incredibly naieve.

Thanks for the cheap shot. I said I gave him the SAME advice as I gave my son. Just so there is no confusion - I gave the advice when my son was sitting on the bench.

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Always beat the other guy to practice. Always.

Good advice, as well as that from the others. It gets tougher as you go. There are very good players in college that don't get to play much. Make the best of each opportunity.

CD, I'm sorry if that came off as a cheap shot.

You made the statement. Either you believe it or you don't.

If you don't believe it (which I hope is true), then don't say it.

If you do believe it, then what I said stands (with the wish that I had said it more tactfully).

quote:

Originally posted by ClevelandDad:
The best players will play.

Originally posted by Texan:
Someone making that statement has either been incredibly blessed in their experiences and hasn't seen much, or is incredibly naieve.

Texan, Yes there are exceptions to the rule. But go to a game and look at the starters for each team, unless the coach is rotating a player in I'll bet 17 of the 18 are the best players available and to me that percentage qualifies someone to make that "the best players wil play" statement.

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But if we old folks would think back to this age, perhaps we might not be quite so hard on him.

When he gets old like us he will also have the right to express his experienced opinions to a young person who asks for it. Kudos to him for asking

rz, even if 17 of the 18 are the best, that doesn't help much if you are the 18th.

With regard to being hard on the young man, it seems to me that often (granted, not always) many posters on this board assume the worst of a young player posting on a controversial subject.

Just seems to me that we should give the young men the benefit of the doubt. And hopefully they will then return when they have other questions or issues. JMHO.

I tend to agree with ClevelandDad. I interpret the advice he gave as "patience is a virtue".

The great thing about baseball is this..............YOU CAN'T HIDE FOR LONG.

Over a stretch of time(games), the numbers rule baseball.

Any coach ignorant to this fact shouldn't coach young men.

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Originally posted by OLDSLUGGER8:
Any coach ignorant to this fact shouldn't coach young men.

Somehow, that ignorance never seems to stop them from coaching...

Id appreciate it if you would all stop suggesting its my attitude.Youd have to be a moron to think I go ranting about my displeasure in the dugout or infront of the coach.Im always the first guy to crack jokes,and support our team in the dugout.

I am just so furstrated when Im the one who has been hitting when pinched hit,and he cant hit the ball when he gets EVERY DAY PLAYING TIME.I think its pathetic he cant block and ball and throws off our pitchers regemine,when I get in there for an inning or two and smother everything.

I havent been given the oppurtunity to lose the job that I so clearly won during the season,much less win it.

This other guy is a 2 sport athlete,he doesnt devote half the time to baseball I do.He also doesnt have to work 5 days a week,so he can attend every morning practice.

Im frustrated because I bust my rear every minute im free to get better wether it be weightlifting,scheduled practices,hitting,etc and Im not given a shot to win a WIDE OPEN JOB.

FC, there has been good advice offered. Take it & use it.

There have been assumptions made that may well be incorrect. If you know in your heart that they are incorrect, then let them slide off you.

All you can do is your best. You can't control the coach or the other players. Keep working hard. Respectfully talk with the coach. Listen carefully. Set the standard for the team.

But once you have done your best, you have done all that anyone can expect of you. You can't control the results.

Hang in there.

futurecatcher - My advice remains the same. Talk to your coach.

Just know that as a coach, I very often knew when there was displeasure regardless of whether the player or parent said something or not. There's body language, comments from other players, etc... It is very hard for anyone to totally self contain it. But also as a coach, I was nearly always very happy to hear the frustration and questions directly from the player's mouth.

If your coach has your team's and your best interests at heart, he will respect you for talking to him.

FC,

The other catcher owns the spot. If his other sport is a fall sport, he'll play that sport and then come back and be the catcher in the spring no matter what you do.

This is very common of two sport players especially good football or basketball players.

Just imagine if you are the starter all fall and then back on the bench come spring when he returns from the other sport. Seen it many times.

I just hope that you haven't suffered the indignity of having to pay for sitting and watching these games while wearing a uniform.

To Thine Own Self Be True.

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He also doesnt have to work 5 days a week,so he can attend every morning practice.

Ouch, there may be something here. Many coaches have this as a big issue. If you and this other player are close in ablity he has to look at intangibles. To him he may be looking at this as the other player being more committed.

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Youd have to be a moron to think I go ranting about my displeasure in the dugout or infront of the coach.

Many times we look at ourself through rose colored glasses and cannot see our faults and weaknesses. I don't know you or have I seen you play. However, you come on this thread with some hostility and I can only assume you are carrying a little attitude, intentional or not.

If this is the tone that you talk to your buddies about the coach with you can bet your bottom dollar it is getting back to him. Right now I can envision your buddies talking off the field and you spout off "The coach must be a moron for playing Joey over me" Trust me FC27 he has picked up on something you said verbally or in your body language and that and interputed it as a little attitude.

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Im always the first guy to crack jokes,and support our team in the dugout.

Sometimes it's not what you do or say it's how you do or say it

You may be a better all around player, you may not (in the coach's eyes, and that's what counts) I see it every day on my son's high school team. The coach has his favorites and he doesn't seem to care about whether the team could be better. I’ve seen him play a career 150 hitter over a 400, just because he liked the 150 guy. (by the way, not my son, mines a pitcher)

All I can add is; give your all, be a team player, build up, don’t tear down anyone (you don’t get better by putting someone else down), get to practice early, stay late, work harder than the other guy, and if you do this you still may not be the starter.

this is the only place Ive said anything about it

My body language in the dugout is like it would be if I were in a game.My coach is someone I have known for a few years now(before my HS days)and he and I joke around alot.We did so at last nights game

I dont show my emotion in public,and youd have to be crazy to do so and throw fits in your teammates and coaches presence.On the way home last night I was just overwhelmed by the fact that I wasnt playing,considering there is 1 game left in the summer.

And as I worked the bullpens last night the pitchers where the ones that approached me and told me that they would like to see me in the games,because we built up trust over the season.

Im always smiling and laughing in the dugouts,regardless of playing time,when I get home is when I can stomp my feet around in the garden and think about the games.

As far as work goes I dont have a choice.I want to go to college,and I will soon need a car because Im not sure how much longer my mom can drive me where I need to be on a daily basis.He has the luxury of having a very wealthy family,and my coach knows this and respects me for my work ethic as he has told me on many occasions

Im sorry if this comes off as steamy,and rude,but this is just beyond frustrating.After a long days of working,I look forward to a baseball game at night.When I show up,knowing im superior in talent,and I find myself on the bench it crushes me.

You really have to know my situation to understand why its so frustrating

oh and by the way Im hitting .321 this summer while he is hitting .269

Quit stomping in the garden and talk to your coach. He's the only one with the answer.

Sometimes you cannot change what is!!!!

futurecatcher27:
This all sounds very familiar to me . My son has struggled through this same thing all varsity season and for the most part through legion season. (same coach) I know it's not easy hearing what is said here to you but believe me that most of these postrers have your best interests at heart. ( and also much experience to share)You may never know what your coach really thinks of you . Don't let that bother you, in life you will not really know what other people think of you either .
What you are going through right now builds iron into you. In the long run , in baseball and in life this will improve you, even though it hurts right now.
Life is not fair. I wish I could create a majic pair of sun glasses that would let coaches see what players are maid of . ( boy could I be richer than Bill Gates if I could patent those.) I only coached youth baseball so I guess I am lucky cause I had to play everyone , so when I was wrong ( and I was wrong about players at times) I never had to get secound guessed because the player got to play anyway and I sometimes would see my error.Some times I was right also. Same with most coaches. Stick with it. Improve your self. never give up. read the advice given here and take it for what it is , for the most part good advice.
Decide where the end of the rainbow is (college ball? ) and work on your own to get there , with or without a coaches help. Go to show cases , camps pro tryouts just to get seen. The tough times you are experienceing now will help you be stronger then. There are many on this board who can help. Some sound gruff when they give you advice but for the most part they are trying to help. ( first time TRhit replyed to one of my posts he said that in the coaches eyes the guy in front of my son was better for the team than he was .) at first that smarted a little bit until I realized that what he was trying to tell us was that coaches can and sometimes are wrong and to get off our duff and do whatever it takes to get better and achieve the goal. I have since talked to TR and watched his posts and found that he's really just trying to help.
I know this was not what you wanted to hear but it is the truth.
Remember , just because your not playing doesn't mean you should'nt be .
I wish you and all who are like you ( including my son ) well and hope it all works out for the best.

I appreciate everything that was said and I have talked to my coach since last night(did so at practice today).His reasoning for me not playing was this.I told him my worries about my standpoint on the team,and he reassured me he will give me every oppurtunity to win the job,however he wanted to see the other catcher play at this level.He said he hadnt been doing so bad(I can beg to differ but thats likely biased)that he had to be pulled.He didnt want to shake his confidence.And he apologized for shaking mine and effecting my playing time.

However I do not have a bad attitude,and that bothered me when people said that.When in the dugout,you couldnt tell wether or not I am playing or not,Im always cheerful,joking around,and asking coaches about game situations and things of that sort.

I was and still am extremely frustrated because I wasnt playing.I still dont like the reasons I am not playing,but if he says Ill get my shot,then so be it.Until its presented to me,all I can do is work and continue to keep my mouth shut infront of the guys.

i'm going to throw my two cents in .you are in the midst of some good life lessons,life isn't fair.when you do get your chance ,get r done.quit once,your a quitter.you sound like a level headed kid.keep working hard, with a good attitude.make the best of it.after the season reavaluate.look at a college roster,25 men,they don't all play everyday .good luck to you

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27,

Great thread, great advice, from some quality posters...

My two cents.....For me comes down to a two simple items....

Be above the bubble, and think big picture.

How do you do this?....

1. Best the best team player that you can. Be above the reproach. Show up early. Stay late...if possible.

2. Communicate with the coach. Build a relationship. Identify and fix those things HE perceives as deficiencies. Empahasise those things that HE values. Keep asking what more you can do. Be his "dream player".

3. Use that relationship, your desire to know what you need to do, your hard work, and your "dream player" status to keep the pressure on him.

4. Be ready to make the most of your openings. Things happen. Opportunities present themselves to those who work hard, keep their eyes open and are truly ready and willing.

5. Beyond that....Think long term/big picture/outside the box. If you cannot go through...then go over, under or around......If the goal is to play college ball there are a great many paths to make that happen, not all run through your current coach. Here are a few of many ideas......

- Summer teams, fall teams, private coaches all have contacts and influence, many greater than a high school coach. Find someone who DOES believe in you and your future.

- Consider playing two positions. Many players change/play muliple positions in college. Frankly, If you are hitting a solid .325 no coach is going to keep you on the bench if you are willing to play another position.

- It has been our experience that more often than not, that college coaches and professional scouts are looking for powerful, skilled athletes, high school records and stats are nice, but there is a reason that recruiters and scouts want to see a player in person.



Frankly, you may be wasting FAR too much energy on the current situation. Use your current situation only for motivation and as a tool to push you to sharpen your mind, body, will and game...

...Fix everything that you can, best the best you can be, then start looking beyond the current situation. Don't get lost in short term frustration. If you truly are a better athlete, and a better player, and a better teammate then the long term belongs to you. Get excited about your future, and get on with it....

44
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FC27,
I don't want to repeat what everyone has been saying, so I'll try and say something else. There must be something in your coaches head that makes him start this guy instead of you. On you profile you right soon to be a sophomore, and that was in '05, so I'll assume your a sophomore now. If this guy is a senior, maybe the coach is getting you used to varsity, and next year, you'll be all ready, starting for two years at Varsity. There won't be any nervousness about being put on a higher level, with better pitching...I'm jsut trying to understand your coach. If that's not his plan, I can't think of anything else. Good luck with whatever you do.

44:

Great advice! I'm printing it and it will be a part of our kitchen "decor"...Thanks!

My bad- I didn't see there was a 2nd page...I didn't realize futurecatcher27 already posted his coaches response.

.

PB...

Thanks! Hope it helps...

Unfortunately, part of the reason I know this stuff is that going through it at the moment with one of mine...

We're patient, We've moved outside the box...AND we've turned it into a joke...We haven't decided whether his new nickname is "The Big Secret" or "Stealth"...

and we're excited about the new opportunities at the next step...

44
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Its hurting my playing time alot,and its hurting my developement.I assume tonight I will be on the bench again,but all I can do is accept it and prepare for what is hopefully my shot in the fall

Thanks all

FC27 - I don't know if the other guy is an upper classman but never-the-less you still have time. Keep your chin up, at least you have a shot as a soph.

I know your summer ball is ending this month have you looked past June? Owasso is holding a 15U World Series in August....I believe there are some teams coming from the area, if you don't have plans you might try to hook up...check with your coach.

FC:

You turn will come. Keep working hard as it appears you are. Good things will come your way.

HS baseball is not fair. I didnt make varsity until a junior and didnt play much but I knew I was a better player far and away. I still signed to play at a D-I school last November because of my summer team performance not HS.

Good luck.

baseballtoday:

Congratulations and I hope you have a wonder-filled college career...good luck to you.

High school baseball in many places isn't very far up on the food chain. Follow observer44's advice--it's good.

Well he pinch hit me in the 5th inning and then I stayed in defensively

I singled to left field,then did ok catching.No passed balls,just didnt have to do much.

FutureCatcher: Alot of great advice (esp. 44's), keep this in mind....when someone shows you who they are...believe them. Beenthere is probably right, but HS ball does not offer much option to change. The lesson learned might be more about the big picture. When you choose a college....CHOOSE CAREFULLY. Study everything you can...how many transfer out...and check out how they did AFTER they left. I absolutely know of several colleges where the best catcher is not playing (despite what posters may think, alot of stupid stuff goes on that has NOTHING to do with the players abilities or attitude) That said, the best HITTER is catching.
FC27, you need to know this much, you must love what you do (catching, playing pbaseball) and you MUST believe in yourself and your skills...against all odds. Keep working, keep improving and do not let anyone tell you otherwise. Posters, though extremely well meaning, all have differing baseball experiences, each has a wisdom that applies to their personal experiences, YOU are acquiring the wisdom to deal with your life experience...just know that you are the most important person to believe in FC27.
Never let anger or frustration rule you, take what you feel and turn it into fuel.