Getting Set Up In College

IMO,
No Xbox, at least to start - your dorm room should be where you sleep - and it is hard if there are a half-dozen kids in there playing x box until 4 am.
Rent the refrigerator - use it, then leave it.
Money - a credit card (we have one that limits to $500 - you can get them for less) and a debit card tied to a checking account in your name and his name so that you can access it too. Create a budget for expenses (after tuition, books and dorm) like meals/snacks outside of meal plan, weekend fooling around, gas if he has a car, and then figure out where that "spending money" is going to come from.
(Yes, I know the credit card is risky, but depending on how far away he is, it may prove to be very valuable in emergency situations).
I send my daughter 2000 miles from home. My advice isn't sage, but I hope this helps!

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Rule#1....

Don't let them sign up for credit cards on campus!!!

If you can't pay the bill 100% when it comes at the end of the month, you can't use a credit card!

Remember "back in the day" when we had to get someone to co-sign a credit card app? Today they give them out like candy, kids get into unbelievable credit trouble, because in so many cases... it wasn't discussed at home.

"I can't be overdrawn... I still have checks left..."

Help your kids out and establish rules with them, and don't let them go out and sign up for credit cards!

cadDAD

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quote:

Rent the refrigerator - use it, then leave it.

Tough call. I have to disagree. My refrigerator cost $120 at WalMart. A microwave would have probably run another $60. So we're at about $180. So if he moves off campus next year, then he's got another refrigerator or you've got one for at home. We've got one in a spare room where we keep beverages.

Renting on the other hand may run $100-200 for one year. At my school, I believe they're $150 for the school year.

1. Meal plan - check with the school as to what they "recommend" and also if you have the option to switch meal plans later in the year. Some will allow this to happen within a short time frame after school begins. Then select the "medium" plan and go from there - if he needs to drop down to a lesser one or whatever.

2. No XBox. They can get so much on their computers these days.

3. Rent a refrigerator - if son is going further than a car drive away to college, you will have to pay to store it over the summer (along with a lot of other things he will take with him that he won't want/be able to bring home.) And if he is not in dorm next year, the dorm refrig you get will be too small - sure you can try to resell it, but most freshman who buy, buy new or rent - so rent one. Make sure that his stuff he brings home will not exceed 2 suitcases, unless of course, you are driving him, or will fly to help bring him home, etc.

4. Spending money - get him a bank account at the college credit union/bank, or a nat'l or regional bank that has a branch close to the school where he can withdraw money. Then all you have to do is deposit (a monthly set amount which you agree upon with your kid) on your end and he can withdraw on his end with his debit card. We did not do the credit card with our kid - too hard for them to account for their spending and they tend to overspend. Also, with cash, they have to learn how to monitor their spending better - IMHO.

4. Dorm supplies - Bed, Bath and Beyond has a deal where you can go into your local store, order whatever you want, and then pick it up at the store closest to the college. Also, check to see what the college book store may be selling when the kids check in - that may be enough.

5. Printer in the room - good idea, not too expensive.

6. Router for wireless? A nice extra, assuming the entire campus (including dorm rooms)are not already wireless.

7. No TV in the room. Besides, they can watch TV on their computers. PS make sure the college supports whatever computer system you buy/own.

8. Check to see what the dorm "cooking" facilities may be - they do not eat all meals at the dining hall and have to eat somewhere besides out. You may want/need to send him with a few pots/pans/dishware.

Like mikamom, mine is many miles away, so we had to make this all happen too.

feel free to pm me if you have specifics.

quote:

Which meal plan he should take. (assume take fewer meals during baseball season)

*XBox, no XBox. (I am sure you can guess what son's vote is )

*Buy or rent the refrigerator/microwave (probably be in off campus housing next year).

*What is the best way to provide spending money(debit card, ATM card, school flex plan card, other)

Less meals is better.........

X Box- Its better to be in his room playing xbox than at other places he can go to be entertained. Game consoles are not scarce at college...they all seem to have one.

Buy the refrigerator.....cheaper over the long run

ATM Debit card

Just my .02

Living on campus take the unlimited meal plan. Unlimited means you can access it anytime you wish. It's worth every penny because you won't find them ordering pizza as often.
You also know that they most likely have better food choices than fast food places.
Also at son's school there was an incentive for other programs bought in the way of points that can be used for additional meals.

XBox without a doubt. They are responsible enough to know when to use it and when not too. Besides, they won't use it half as much as they used to at home...LOL. Mine also brought a tv. We bought a cheap one that came home still working but remote lost and the closed caption doesn't turn off. He got his monies worth though.

Buy everything, they can sell it afterwards or keep it, in son's apartment they had two micros for use, two of everything actually and used it. The refridgerator later became the beerator. However wait until a roomate assignment, one brings micro the other the fridge, etc. Or you might want to wait until a week to see if it's really needed.
We loaded up son's Tiger card with money for on campus as well as an ATM Visa debit card, that was mostly needed to be accessed for cash and was given a cash budget for the week. Mine was far from home so he had a cc in case of emergency. Bank America has a free student checking with debit card. They don't have to write checks often but it's good time to begin how to use a checking account. Some people just like the rechargable debit cards, other like to have their kids in the same bank so they can transfer funds easily. First year at any school there is not really a big need for it's use if they eat in the cafeteria. If they are spending too much means that may mean are doing too many extra things they shouldn't, JMO.
Also since son was in the middle of nowhere, I sent him with enough toiletries to last until christmas. he had transportation but everything was very far and time was limited. If you are close that is good.

BTW, the school funds card (loaded on their ID's usually) is great for laundry instead of needing change.

I remember the "college corner" first year before son went off to school, sometimes I got sad just looking at the pile growing, knowing that he was leaving. Wow, that was just ages ago.

BD - we posted at the same time. Is your refrig a full size? Also, I would not do a microwave in the room before checking to see if the dorm has one on the floor common room, or if the college will allow micros in the room. Some don't allow cooking items in the rooms. If they do, maybe add a coffee pot, if your student drinks coffee. Buying Starbucks every day may put a huge dent in the student budget.

Reading all of these, I am chuckling. Jerseydad, see the variety of opinions! Every reason is a good one, you just need to figure out which reason(s) work for you!

A joint checking account allows you to deposit money on one end and the student to withdraw it on the other.

Buy a small refriderator. Buy it there so it doesn't have to travel. They're not that expensive. If he can sell it for $20 at the end of the year to a summer school student, great. If not give it away. It think it's cheaper than renting.

On the meal plans it depends on how it's structured. Some plans deplete dollars from a debit plan. Some are for specific meals. You have to know what the school offers. My daughter missed a lot of meals her freshman year due to team travel. Last year she was in an on campus apartment with a kitchen.

XBox wasn't an issue with a daughter. No way, no how will my son take XBox to college for the reason stated in another post. Your son can play XBox in someone elses room.

Soph year we loaded up her car and put it on the Auto Train. She flew.

Sage advice: Don't call every day. Let him grow.

Another thought- coordinate all dorm room non personal supplies (frig, tv?, printer, router, micro coffee pot) with roommate - share the items (except maybe the printer) and decide who takes what home at the end of the year, etc.

Buy under the bed storage boxes - space is limited. Some beds need lifts, others won't. Some dorms need extra long bed sheets, some don't.

See what the school tells you.

I agree with pia, rather son be home with his xbox than out and about. it's also cheaper than playing cards for entertainment.


Must haves, flashlight, cheap flip flops, foam support for bed and a good sturdy backpack as they carry their life in their backpack. We bought all school supplies in Walmart when we got to Clemson. For players going far from home, don't worry you can find a walmart or target anywhere to get what they need or you forgot on moving day.



Have fun!

Good call on the printer in the room - invaluable!

Also in regard to computer stuff - we had gotten my daughter a Dell with the 3 year service warranty. Expensive, yes, but when she had a major computer problem , the tech met her in the dorm lobby and fixed it on the spot. Probably most computer companies have a close or on-campus rep like this. Also, if your student has a new computer, don't buy the Outlook Office with it - get it at the bookstore for a ridiculously low price and load it at school. (Make sure they have it of course) or perhaps you can download it from a school site. I just know they sell it to students at an incredibly cheap price.

As far as the money thing goes - everyone is going to have a different opinion and comfort level!

If you are shipping things, check with your dorm to see how boxes should be marked. Most will have a storage area they are willing to put them into. Ask if they can save the boxes for you in that storage area for move-out in the spring.

The suggestion about checking with the roommate is a GREAT one too. No need for two refrigerators unless they are a really thirsty bunch!

Have fun!

1. Meal Plan: Ask the school or if he/she is playing a sport ask their coach. They recommended which meal plan would be right for my son.

2. XBox: Differing opinions on here, but my son took his and honestly doesn't have alot of time to play even during summer school (classes, workouts, study hall, and supper everyday). How do I know, my daughter also has one at home and when I go to play Halo 3 on xbox live (daddy loves video games), my son's id hasn't been on for days. He does play some during weekends, passes idle time.

3. Spending money: We choose to use the debit card route, in his name and ours. We put ***x dollars in his account for graduation, plus gifts he received, and we have statements sent to us so that we can keep up with balance along with him. If he needs extra money for books or other school necessities, we put money in his account for those expenses. Also, if your child's school is like ours, he has to use his flex card account for things like laundry, snack machines, etc. Those things don't use coins at his school, only swipe of the flex card. Make sure you put $50 to $100 on that for those things.

4. Refrigerator/microwave: His room came with one so we didn't have to consider this.

5. TV/DVD player: Most of the time his teammates/friends are in his room watching TV or a movie.

I'll offer another bit of advise on an unsolicited topic- lofts. The summer before I left for college, the school mails us some info about living arrangements- roommate name and info, etc.

Included is info on building your own loft if you want to maximize your space and you'd prefer not to buy one from whatever company provides them. My dad and uncle have spent part (in my dad's case) or all (in my uncle's case) of their lives doing carpentry, so we figure we'll just build one and save some money. So included in this packet are the specifications for how these lofts should be built (lumber to use, etc). We build this loft to their exact specifications.

Well, when we get there to move this thing in, we're one of the few (maybe only) folks to have built our own. To say this thing weighed a TON would be an understatement. Of course, you pretty much have to resort to some illegal activities to get on the elevator, considering everyone is moving in at the same time. So we have to carry it up the stairs- major PITA. Then, to top it all off, we see the lofts that you could buy. Let's just say they weren't exactly built to the specifications we were given. So, moral of the story, if we had it to do over again, we would have just bought the loft.

rent the frigde, I wouldn't trust college students not to take food out of a communal fridge and make it their own.
Debit/ATM card, tell him to use the debit card as a credit card transaction when buying stuff in the store to save on debit fees the bank charges.

Here's a very thorough list of items a FY might need on hand.......some of it is obviously oriented towards the daughters, but there were so many things I wouldn't have thought of.....and beats having to sit down and think of it all yourself:

http://www.belmont.k12.ma.us/bhs/docs/CollegeSupplyList-BHS.pdf

Ten days and counting until we're off to Texas.....enjoying the cool weather of Seattle while we can!

I agree with those that say buy his frig and microwave. Coordinate the frig with his roomate if he has one, but honestly two males will probably need two frigs. I think he needs a microwave in his room - commonly shared ones get too NASTY.

As far as x-box, I agree with those that say take it. He's a young adult now and continuing to learn to manage his time - that includes time for pursuits outside baseball and academics. It's a good stress reliever and he won't be playing it nearly as much as you might fear. Far worse things to be doing on down time and unless he's a tremendous introvert and having the game will encourage him to stay in his room too much - take the game.

Money - I think a nice mix of a credit or debit card with a limit placed on it along with a small amount of cash. If he's living in a traditional type of setting and has a meal card, he won't need a lot of cash. Learning to budget whatever you give him is another part of becoming an adult. You can always re-evaluate if you think he doesn't have enough... trying to back off if you think he's spending unwisely can be more difficult.

Many people prefer to wait until they get to school and buy things. We always ended up making a last minue trip to the store upon move in and will with my daughter this year. However, I wanted to have the bulk of things bought over the summer. Easier on my budget and allowed me to bargain shop as well as be more prepared. Worked out best for us.

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Go to an Academy. Show up for Beast (basic training) with the clothes on your back, and they mail those home the next day.

Not a normal college experience however...

cadKID#2 is doing his summer OPS assignment right now at Marine Corps Training School. Called last night and said he got to shoot an anti-tank weapon y'day. 1 for 1, killed a tank!

cadDAD

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If your son uses a laptop, get LoJack!!
Laptops tend to grow legs & wander off.

A lot of good advice here about what to take. So I'll go the opposite way (no, no, not giving Bad Advice! )

Our kids are used to a lot of stuff, much of which has already been mentioned. But how much of it do they actually need? Most stuff that goes then has to be brought back or dumped. And in between, they have to take care of it. Ya'll know your sons to answer how well that will happen.

My advice would be to get your list together and/or your stack started and then take an extremely hard look at it and see where you can cut back.

Nice To Have and Necessary are two different things!

one of the benefits of mine going off with the clothes on his back, a few toiletries and $100 in his pocket...

I agree with Orlando and guys don't need all the stuff our daughters do. Give mine his pc, ipod, phone, TV and xbox and he's complete. He had some issues when he went to college, didn't fit well in the twin bed, and sharing one bathroom with 3 others got a but testy at times, but with the locker room being a few minutes away he learned to adjust.
I think that I may have gone overboard, but that meant less the following year. My son had an actual apartment first year, so he didn't need some things, but then again needed others (like furniture, etc). He had three roommates so we each pitched in for necessities.
This past february with son returing all his things here there were items that were never used. Those he took with him to use where he lives now. I do remember one silly item, an ironing board, mine prefers the floor.
Try to make a budget and stick to it, it can become very expensive.

What about a safe for laptop, jewlery extra car keys etc anyone with any opinions on safes?

SAFE: I think the calibre of your son's friends (if he plays baseball) will be better than most. My son never had anything stolen out of his apt.

MONEY: We used the debit/ATM card with a joint account. Used online banking. The only two thing you have to make sure of: 1. That you can make deposits and --- 2. he can make withdrawals. That will cover 99% of the transactions. No credit card!

XBox: He will play XBox if he wants to. Most baseball locker rooms have them. If he wants one --- give it to him.

Laptop: I say go as cheap as you can (500.00 or less). Make sure it can play DVDs, download music from iTunes and/or limewire, has sufficent USB ports for iPods (etc) can access "Facebook" and "MySpace" , and has a wireless internet card. You might throw in a word processing program too just in case he has to type a paper.

Cell phone: I suggest you get unlimited texting w/PICs. Your carrier may change as he changes girlfriends. Make sure he has 2 chargers (he will forget one somewhere)

GPS: Might want to consider a GPS if your son is away from home.

Tool Box: Tape, pliers, small crescent wrench, wire, small hammer and nails (pictures). (It's a man thing)

I laughed as I read almost all these suggestions. Younggun himself leaves next week and it seems my list grows by the day!

We too got younggun the 3yr accidental damage warranty in case he just happens to back over it with his truck..lol. And we also purchased the Lo-jack feature for 3yrs because just like his ball gloves over the past 2-3 yrs that seem to have grown legs and walked off..I'm sure laptops will grow legs as well. ugh.

Money. We are getting him a debit card with a monthly allowance of $200 for incidentals, i.e. gas, meals after practice when the chow hall is closed, movies, etc., and a credit card with a $500 maximum to use for larger purchases, i.e. books, clothes, room necessities, etc. and for the purpose of helping him establish a line of credit for when he graduates.

I found a large lockable storage trunk at Bed, Bath, and Beyond that is ideal for locking up things (credit card!) that may need to be locked away when he is away on weekends or practicing. Mainly he will use it to store "extra" items that he will need over time.

Another parent also suggested to us a while back about purchasing a small inexpensive shredder. These kids are inundated with junk mail from financial companies, credit card companies, etc. and shredding (not just throwing in the trash) was the best way to discard them in today's society of ID and credit card theft.

We were given the phone number to his roomate/teammate and are splitting over who is bringing the fridge (them) and the microwave (us).

Heck, those are the easy things to remember. It's the other 100+ things that are driving us crazy!

We took our son to college. We didn't buy anything until we saw the situation. We bought him sheets etc for an extra long bed they supplied after he hung out over the end of the bed.
We bought him a printer scanner combo, a mini fridge and micro wave. He uses all of these items daily.
He has a credit card with a $2000. limit jointly with my wife having access to it. He has a Canadian account which we transfer money into and he transfers to a US credit union . He has checks for paying rent and bills. He had a C phone but his girl friends parents put him on their family play. He has an unbelieveble C phone that is similar to an I phone but also has a slide out key board. The plan has free international calling and text messaging. The phone is unlocked so he can buy a sim here and use it while here in Canada.
Personally I think it is better to wait and see what they really need as things change. My son has a free unlimited meal plan but be prepared for fast food etc. They get bored eating the same thing as the plans have limited choices.
My son also has Xbox, PS3 and we bought him a Wii system for xmas. He had a DS but sold it. He played it on the bus trips. When we call him he usually has a gang over playing Wii. That system is husterical. The Wii is also portable and he brought it home for a couple weeks before he heads back for his SR year.
I think it is better to wait and see what you need and there are usually lots of student deals on. There is a couple weeks where you can set things up. My son's apt is tastefully decorated with some donated furniture froom his roommates relatives in the area.

Don't forget the posters. This one seemed to be very popular on campus.

quote:

Originally posted by Fungo:
Don't forget the posters. This one seemed to be very popular on campus.

Fungo,
roflmao. Those are the things that the kids pick up "after they arrive" when mom and dad go back home.

College is supposed to be fun thus I would not try and place remote restrictions on them which they will not be bound to follow anyways. If they have an Xbox, then let them take it with them. Guitar Hero is perhaps the most popular game on campus. My son is pretty good at Aerosmith and Led Zepplin.

I had simple advice for my son when he left for college and he has held up his end of the bargain - knock on wood (life is always a cr-ap shoot).

Pleading No. 1 - I asked that he never drive (if he drank) or get in a car with someone who has had something to drink. I pre-authorized paying for a cab (if necessary) and no questions asked. I pray he has followed those simple rules because I still remind him of them even though he is now a senior.

Pleading No. 2 - I asked that he do his homework as soon as he got home and then goof off. The biggest mistake most college kids make is putting things off until it is too late - especially the first semester. I encouraged my son to have fun but AFTER he did his homework. That is all I asked of him and it has worked thus far.

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quote:

Originally posted by ClevelandDad:

Pleading No. 1 - I asked that he never drive (if he drank) or get in a car with someone who has had something to drink. I pre-authorized paying for a cab (if necessary) and no questions asked. I pray he has followed those simple rules because I still remind him of them even though he is now a senior.

Pleading No. 2 - I asked that he do his homework as soon as he got home and then goof off. The biggest mistake most college kids make is putting things off until it is too late - especially the first semester. I encouraged my son to have fun but AFTER he did his homework. That is all I asked of him and it has worked thus far.

Exactamundo!

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They will do what they are gonna do.
We have given them the foundation.
Here is something I posted elsewhere:

A Parent’s Prayer

I pray that I may let my child live his own life and not the one I wish I had lived. Therefore, guard me against burdening him with doing what I failed to do.

Help me to see his missteps today in perspective against the long road he must travel, and grant me the grace to be patient with his sometimes slow pace.

Give me the wisdom to know when to smile at the small mischiefs of his age and when to show firmness against the impulses he fears and cannot handle.

Help me to hear the anguish in his heart through the din of angry words or across the gulf of brooding silence; and, having heard, grant me the ability to bridge the gap between us with understanding.

I pray that I may raise my voice more in joy at who he is than in vexation of who he is not, so that each day he may grow in sureness of himself.

Help me to regard him with genuine affection so he will feel affection for others. Then give me the strength, O Lord, to free him so he can move strongly on his way.

Great posts by all. I have learned several things from reading.

I don't believe anyone has mentioned a rug for the floor. My son's dorm floors are hard linoleum so we are sending him up with a large carpet remnant that will make things seem more cozy.

I called the campus housing office to inquire about nearby banks and was informed that one bank has an on-campus ATM with no fees for account holders. Bingo! That's the bank for my son. There's a branch about 5 minutes from my house and I'm hoping to be able to set up automatic transfers from my account to his.

We had problems last year with him not keeping track of his bank account balance and ended up closing the account. I've been trying to figure out a way to solve this problem and am going to encourage son to take out lump-sum withdrawals ($20, $40, etc.) rather than use the debit card for a lot of piddly purchases ($3.63 at McDonalds, $33.79 at gas station, etc.) that make it hard for him to keep tabs on his balance.

Meal plan -- originally, we were going to do the 14 meal per week plan, but then I got concerned that we'd be getting regular calls from son saying he needed more money for food. I found out that for only $100 more for the entire semester, I could get him an unlimited meal plan that includes even late evening snacks. We are doing this for the fall semester at least and will see how things go after that.

Great Thread!

I know I sent my son with way too much stuff last year for the dorm but he didn't have to do laundry as often!

For my son, the XBox was a must have for the down times. We have a "live" account and my younger son and husband got a kick out of playing my son (or his roommates) at different times. They had a "suite" dorm room and the Xbox was in the main room. Good stress reliever for all the pressure of baseball, academics, and being away from home.

The roommates bought an old big screen TV off of Craig's List for a $100 that they put in the little main room for the XBOX. We sure had fun imagining those boys going to pick up the big screen and get it in the dorm elevator and up to their room. One of the boys had custody of the TV over the summer.

We bought the frig and my son will put it in his room in the house they are renting this year. Hopefully it is for food....

I am working on getting him set up for a house this year - is there any point in buying the cleaning supplies? I guess for my peace of mind! My son has absolutely no interest in shopping for anything for the house. Last year we got into a huge fight at Target when I was moving him into the dorm - he had no interest in that either.

He is rooming with the same 6 guys that were put together in their suite last year. Amazing how you can become best friends quickly! He only knew one of them before.

Infield, his dorm was carpeted so no need for the rug for us. I also encouraged my son to take out larger sums on the ATM but he usually didn't. I think it is a must to have a bank account tied in to theirs. We also got him an American Express card from our account with his name on it for special emergencies and to buy books.

I also do a little medicine chest - band aids, Advil, Neosporin, Claritin, Benedryl, Cough medicine, diarrhea medicine,etc. I would add Lotromin to the list this year after my son battled athlete's foot last year. The trainer will keep an eye out for your son but this medicine chest helps when they are sick and you aren't there. Also inform your son about the clinic on campus. Mine actually went once last year.

Cell phones are a must since the coaches use them to get in touch with players.

Can someone please tell me what a "bed lifter" is and where to purchase one/them?

We will need to slide his storage trunk underneath his bed and it's quite low to the ground.

YoungGunDad,
Suggest you make sure the bed has round or square legs. Bed lifts are at Bed Bath & Beyond, Walmarts, Target, even Sam's Club. Usually it raises about 4-6". priced about $10.

Everyone,
Remember to sign the HIPAA & FERPA forms!! These gives you legal acess to your son's medical history and grades while at college. You can download the forms from your son's schools, usually thru registrar. Keep a copy for your records, with both yours & students signatures & send the other copy to school.

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While this is way out of my "Guy" league...

I do remember last couple years there were long discussions on the value of Fabreeze sheets to keep things "fresh" in the face of all not-so-fresh things "baseball guy"....

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I know in my son's freshman year their laundry was done for them by some female freshmen. Not sure how he lucked out but now he does his own ironing and laurdy.