Goals and dreams

JustBB - There are many issues in society that I think contribute to the thoughts you express. I think our society as a whole wants instant gratification much of the time. Thus, we don't want to set goals in order to attain our dreams. Takes too long for goals - we just want the dream - whatever that may be. We also lead fast paced lives and sometimes forget about the goals. At least we forget to enjoy achieving those goals. I watched an old home movie last night when my kids were 11 and 14. It was actually during a break of a tournament my son was in. Both my kids and about six of the other players played whiffle ball in the parking lot. I can remember thinking at the time, you boys are going to get tired and you need that energy for your real games. GOOD GRIEF! Now, I watched that footage and I sat there with a huge grin. Kids having fun. Kids making friends. Kids being kids. We just forget sometimes. I don't even remember now if they won the tournament or not - I think I used up the video battery in the parking lot! We should all have a goal of enjoying life and friends more, while being patient for our dreams to come true.

Kids grow up too fast now. What a shame. The "real world" comes up so fast anyway, I wish there was someway to slow them down. Every year of my son's life I thought, "oh wow, what a great age, I wish he would stay like this forever." He is now 17 and I'm still saying the same thing. Looking back, he doesn't remember the championship game they won, he just remembers being thrown into a pile of bodies. He doesn't remember the "big loss", but the coach that hugged him silently afterwards. Or the pool party afterwards, or the parents standing in a storm, singing together during a rainout.
IMO, that's what it's all about!

My son's dream was always the same - play DI ball down south and move into the pros. As he became older, 11th and 12th grades, he seemed to adjust the dream. First goal of his was to be MVP in LL. That he decided at the end of the season before his last yr in LL. He told the coach that he was going to be MVP and the coach still tells his LL teams how he set that as a goal and did reach it. In jr. high, it was a goal to make the varsity team as a freshman. He would hand me a piece of paper every yr with his goals for the yr and would check off the ones he achieved. It could've been as simple as getting a hit off a certain pitcher. I'd tuck them away and now they sit in his scrapbook of memories. As he got closer to leaving school, he also kept getting closer to home in his choices for college. No longer was DI in the south a priority but being able to come home more and have us still get to see him play seemed more important. Plus alittle reality I think set in that it's alot harder to get on one of those teams when you're from up north. And then the real reality of his grades not being DI material hit home. He adjusted again and now is at a DIII school up north, close to home and having the time of his life. The goal now is to make it to the DIII WS while in college. He loves the school, the team and his teammates. He has new goals for next year already but I miss not getting slipped that little piece of paper anymore. I guess the dream is still there just tempered with some reality. Sure he'd like to play pro ball still but would just be thrilled to even get to play in the minors for awhile. He knows that's still a possibility since a teammate is living proof. I think for awhile he thought since he was at a DIII school that this would be the end of his dream but I saw it renewed when his friend was drafted this yr. For me, I figure he'll know when to move on in life and it's always nice to have a dream.

Justbaseball,
You really touch home with this one. I’m guilty! I used to tell my son time and time again.... ”A goal without a plan is a dream”.

Fungo

This is kinda off-topic, but I thought I would share it. Last summer our local YMCA sponsered a last minute baseball camp. It really wasn't much of an instructional camp. It was just one of our better local high school programs working with the local community. The kids were broke up into 4 teams playing each other on two different fields. The high school kids played too. So, here you had kids from 9 - 18 playing ball together. The high school pitchers were gently tossing the ball to the little kids, batting with their wrong hand, etc. I think the high school players had as much fun as the little ones. None of the coaches or parents got involved one bit. It was really pretty cool. I think the high school players remembered how fun this GAME can be while the little ones were learning for the first time.

Until recently, I used to think that my son was at a disadvantage because he started playing "competitive" baseball later than most. Before his HS Sophomore year, there were no camps, no tournaments, no travel teams... just the local community team in that short Spring season, with a lot of fun... for the love of the game. After that, it was on to the next "season", whether basketball or football or music or whatever. We just didn't know any better <wink>.

I think he thought his playing days were coming to a close, as he skipped out on HS Freshman baseball and almost did not register for Legion. But, through some epiphany, my son decided that he really did love baseball and he didn't want it to end. So, he decided to take a run at just making the HS team... college never even entered the picture. So, off we go to camps and such, learned a LOT of what we'd missed over the years and he gained an even greater passion for the game. He made the team his Sophomore year and just grew hungrier... "Gee, there's got to be more than 2 more years of baseball left? Right, Dad?" So, the Junior season was an intense blur, punctuated by an injury and corresponding recovery. But, more camps and clinics. Now here we stand at the edge of his Senior year, (with Senioritis already setting in <grin>, and now the goal/dream (they seem the same) is to somehow continue playing in college... the pro's never even enter the picture.

As a Little Leaguer, with a lifesize picture of Cal in a room decorated in Oriole memorabilia, complete with orange trim woodwork, an Oriole bedspread and a "bird" paper border on the walls, the pro's were clearly a "dream". Now, the room is decorated in "quintessential teen". Gone are all of those gawdy MLB decoratives, replaced with a collection of all sort of posters, papers, books, stereo, baseball equipment, guitar and dirty laundry. But, recently he pulled out a small poster of "Cal" from his pre-teen days, containing some pithy quote about endurance or patience or something. No, there's no "goal" of making it to the pro's... I'm not even sure it is a dream as much as it is a memory of a dream to motivate him to get to the next rung.

No matter what the next baseball step is, we sure hope he can keep playing. We both know it's just a game... but there is something about it isn't there? At 40-something, I still get that tingle when I spy a piece of baseball equipment in the garage. Don't understand it. Anyway, if he makes the next step into college ball, we will have been extremely indebted to the many kind "strangers" on this site, helping us to understand and navigate this new world. It's not quite the same as going to the local firehouse each spring with a copy of his birth certificate and a check for registration in hand <grin>.

I do know, and I think I will hold him to this, that when his "playing days" are over, whenver that may be, he has said on multiple occasions, that he wants to go back to Little League or Teener League and coach a team with me. While I look forward to that day, it's a day that I hope doesn't come too soon, but when it does, I know it will be good. Nope. We've not been disadvantaged. We've been extraordinarily blessed. It all seems like one big dream to me.

My son's goal since he was in first grade and attended the local HS Summer Baseball Camp, for the first time, was to make that HS's 5A Varsity team before he graduated. He is now a Jr. and still shooting for that goal and come Spring he will find out if he has achieved this goal or will have to work even harder to make it his senior year.

To help him along the way I wrote this to him during his Soph. year:

Your Personal "Goals" are the "Steps" to your DREAMS.....................KEEP CLIMBING.

He is Still Climbing and it is me that has to remind myself that it is his goals that motivate him and my goals for him are just reflections of what I see for him based on what I see out of him.

Goals that motivate are key.

There is a side benefit to setting goals and trying to meet them. Sometimes, setting and meeting goals can lead to things you never imagined when you set them.

When my son was 10 and 11, he didn't make the all-star team for his league. He told me that his goal for his 12 year old year was to make that team. He did. What he didn't realize was that his first all star season would end up with him on the field celebrating a world championship. He never imagined that that would happen, but by having a goal and reaching it, it did.

When he was 15 and a freshman, he tried out for the high school team. All he wanted to do was make the JV team. He did. What he didn't realize was that 4 months later, he would be standing on the field getting introduced as one of the reserves on a varsity team playing in the state championship game. He never imagined that would happen, but by working for his goal, it did.

I guess my point is that by setting goals and working hard to meet them you may receive rewards that you never imagined when you set them!

quote:

Originally posted by justbaseball:
So he thought maybe we should be thinking of new programs where we just have "supervised-let-them-play." (He agreed that most parents won't allow no supervision...thus the supervised-let-them-play). Throw the bases and balls out there and then go read a book under a tree. Let them invent the game they want to play (like we did)...make up their own rules...just have some fun and then take them home to do homework.

I tried this - 3 dads showed up and proceeded to do infield practice......

Goals and Dreams

Life is a journey. Not really too original but you get the drift. On this site it is baseball we discuss. All angles of the experience. Some tell of great success. Others about situations that they feel impede progress. We all have different angles of looking at things. I was a high school coach for many years so I look at it from that perspective and am also a parent whose son just completed his playing eligibility in college.

I have seen the good and the bad. It is alwyays easy to handle the good the key is how you handle the bad. Hindsight is 20/20. I think knowing the outcome before you make a decision would make geniuses of us all. But as far as goals and dreams you never reach them unless you take chances and battle through the bad. Many people say your goals have to be realistic but who determines the reality? I think that is up to the individual. I always tell my students do not let anyone tell you you can not do something. That is up to them to discover.

justbaseball, you are so right in that we need to let kids be kids. Sports should not be work. Kids should also dictate how much they put into playing. My daughter's select team had tryouts last night for the first time. We had 5 girls show up from a team that we played last year. All 5 started for that team. Why were they at our tryouts? THEY DIDN'T HAVE FUN PLAYING FOR THEIR TEAM - IT PLACED IN THE TOP 4 STATE TOURNAMENT. The parents had noticed that our girls laugh a lot when they play and yet, we win a lot.

Goals - My daughter asked last night during supper what else she has to do to play professional softball. She is 12 and that is all she wants to do. As a parent, we have to run with it and in our case, we have to temper it some because she will play softball 24 hours a day.

Dreams - Ryan Shupe has a song "Dream Big"

And when you cry be sure to dry your eyes
Cause Better days are sure to come
When you smile be sure to smile wide
and don’t let them know they have won.
And when you walk, walk with pride
don’t show the hurt inside cause the pain will soon be gone.

And when you dream, dream big
As big as the ocean blue
Cause when you dream it might come true
And when you dream, dream big.

And when you laugh be sure to laugh out loud
cause it will carry all your cares away
And when you see, see the beauty all around and in yourself
and it will let you feel ok.
And when you pray, pray for strength to help you carry on
when the troubles come your way

And when you dream, dream big
As big as the ocean blue
Cause when you dream it might come true
And when you dream, dream big.

I passed this out this year to all of my students! Take care and nice topic!

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Love this thread...gets to the reality of the thing. Beyond, or should I say through, the vehicle of baseball we learn lessons about the bigger picture....life.

While I am a big proponent of goals and dreams, I use them, I encourage them, I believe in them...it has always been my contention that we often learn more from our failures, and the coping skills, and the adaptions and changes that we make in the wake of disasters and than we do from our successes.

Not always obviously, but often success breeds complacancy, a superior attitude, and ego. Conversely failure tests who you really are and what you really believe. Failure makes you look deep, and there are incredible lessons and growth in that depth.


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