Good Quotes heard at Tryout Camps

Quote: "His parents must have used a convenience store to measure his height and a circus carny to guess his weight before filling in this profile sheet".


Quote: " Must be inflation 'cause 88 looks more like 78 these days".

I know this is an old one but there may be some who haven't heard it. "Pitcher must be sick, he's throwing up!"

An old coach with the Angels told a signee after missing three ground balls in a row at shortstop-"Son, a cow died so you could have a ballglove...USE IT".

Moc1

"He's quicker than the last Mass at a summer resort "

Get your arms loose. The first one with a black eye is cut.

One of the best I heard:

"Hey...look! It's scout."

"Naaahhh. It's just andy."

Redbird (self proclaimed baseball expert)

Please list all the MLB teams you have worked for as a MLB scout.

30 years ago,
scout: Hey pitch, quit throwing all that junk, we just wanna see fastballs.

player(me): What fastball?

Player after facing a sidearm righty throwing 88-89mph

man they throw harder here than they do in softball

Said to pitcher after not backing up 3b:

Thats a great spot to watch the game from, how much did you pay for that ticket?

these are still funny. can you tell i'm bored.

"Son I have seen better swings on a porch."

A coach to a pitcher who had a rough outing: "Next time I will have the grounds crew drag the warning track"

One of my favorites..
Tell them to take a couple days off, then after that QUIT...

Player is so bad he couldnt play dead in a cowboy movie...

"Mix in a catch."

"You have a new nickname son. Butter Bean because you just got shelled."

.



.

One of the reasons I stopped coaching my son on a team--"Would you please start throwing some D++M strikes" Him "Im trying" Me "If you want to eat tonight, youll try harder" He was like 12 at the time, so I figured it was time to pump the brakes!!

After a broken bat base hit and a run scored. Player upset his favorite bat broke. The Coach says atleast the bat died a hero!

Got a nail at home? Drive it in the wall and hang your spikes on it.

As the player throws the ball over the first base dugout from ss, the coach says "shows great arm strength!"

My son told me this one. A kid asked for a tryout to his travel team. The kid and my son took their turn working with the pitching coach. After warming up and throwing five fastballs the coach told the kid, "Nice change! Now show me your fastball." The kid gave him a blank stare, threw two more fastballs and left the facility. I guess the kid figured he couldn't make the team with his velocity. He was most likely right. The pitching coach really thought he was throwing changes.

I was working with a pitcher. He asked me "do you want to see my change" I said try throwing a strike for a change. One time a kid came into the coaches office after seeing the lineup card on the locker room board complaining about hitting 9th. I sounded confused and we walked back to the locker room.Looking confused I took a pencil and scratched his name off and replaced it with another player and said now you are not hitting at all.

today i would probably be called into the principals office

"He came out of nowhere, and brought it with him"!

quote:

Originally posted by Will:
I was working with a pitcher. He asked me "do you want to see my change" I said try throwing a strike for a change. One time a kid came into the coaches office after seeing the lineup card on the locker room board complaining about hitting 9th. I sounded confused and we walked back to the locker room.Looking confused I took a pencil and scratched his name off and replaced it with another player and said now you are not hitting at all.

today i would probably be called into the principals office

In college summer ball, after pregame I approached the coach and told him my knee was bothering me and it would be better for the team to DH me and put someone else in center. When the lineup was posted I wasn't in it. After the game the coached walked by and asked me how the knee is recovering. My response, "Very quickly."

This one came from an umpire in a preseason hs friendly game when a young man hit a sky-high popup to first: "Don't worry about it; just another 250 feet and that would have been a home run".


He's working on a new pitch' it's called a "strike".

From my Dad's tryout card before the war: good glove, good contact hitter, runs too long in the same place.

quote:

This one came from an umpire in a preseason hs friendly game when a young man hit a sky-high popup to first: "Don't worry about it; just another 250 feet and that would have been a home run".

In 13U ball we had a kid who flied out a lot. When he would ask how far it went we would respond with mock enthusiam, "Out of LL!"

In my son's first 13U at bat he crushed a one hopper right at the second baseman for an easy 4-6-3 DP. He came back to the bench muttering he can't hit a ball any harder. In LL or 12U it would have been a gapper.

The next time up he elevates the ball for a triple. As he gets up to dust himself off he asked the third base coach if it was out of LL. The coach dryly replied without expression, "Son, you not in LL anymore."

quote:

From my Dad's tryout card before the war: good glove, good contact hitter, runs too long in the same place.

The opposite .... He runs like a deer. Unfortunately he hits and fields like one too.

In HS a conversation between a Freshman pitcher and a senior catcher on the second day of HS practice. Pitcher had a knuckle ball that he thought was awesome. It had no movement but was so slow it actually fooled a lot of MS hitters.

Catcher: OK 1 for fast ball and 2 for curve.
Pitcher: And three for my knuckle
Catcher: No 4 for the knuckle
Pitcher: why 4.
Catcher: Because that's how many bases the hitter will get to touch if you throw that piece of **** in HS.