High school coach won't allow in season recruiting visits

Are these official visits and are they far from home? Perhaps your son could work out an alternative practice schedule to offset some of the dates he will be away.

Baseball is a team sport, I support the coach in wanting to have all players attend all events including practices during season, except for emergencies, you had a chance to make visits before the season started.

Does your school practice and/or play games over the weekend? You will not be able to sit in on classes, but you will be able to attend a weekend series at the college.

It should not have to come down to threatening playing time.

I don't know if there's a standard, but the coach oughta support your son in advancing the kid's career.

There are times in life where the individual needs to sacrifice for the team, and there are times when the team needs to sacrifice for the individual. This fits the latter IMO.

HS coaches have it tough these days w/ travel ball, helicopter parents and the like, but this coach could take this opportunity to teach a valuable lesson and turn it into a bonding experience instead of fracturing the team. The coach and teammates should all take pride in one of their own having success.

For instance, he could say, "huddle up guys. Listen, little jimmy has gotten a great opportunity to go visit so and so, and we're gonna support him. I would ask the same if it were any of you or even my own son. Now let's bow our heads in a moment of silence to show our solidarity with lil jimmy and beseach the Lord Almighty for His blessings on one of our finest. Amen."

When he gets back from his visit, jimmy can tellem all about it and encourage them to work their butts off so they get the same chance.

If it's a matter of fairness to the other players, I see no harm in a policy of a little extra running as payment for missing practice--- even an excused one. Everyone's square. A talented player missing game time for this is undue punishment on the player and the team.

Great post rawbatspeeddad!

And welcome to HSBBW!

The coach needs to understand that having a player recruited for college is a feather in his cap, and something that encourages the other players in his pipeline.

It is reasonable to ask permission to miss a practice to go on a visit. It is not reasonable to miss several practices so that you can visit every team that might express interest in you. In season, you do need to limit visits, especially if you're going on a school day when your team has games/practices.

It is reasonable for him to ask you to coordinate with him on when visits take place, so that disruption to the team can be minimized and managed. It is not reasonable for him to ban all such visits, and if he were to persist, I would go over his head.

There is no reason the player cannot arrange his visits so as to not intrude on his HS baseball---most, if not all, college coaches understand and appreciate a players loyalty to his team


We run into the conflict with our travel team from time to time but if we are in the region of the school where we are playing we can usually work it our with the college coach so the boy gets the best of both worlds---sometimes it can't be worked out so the boy goes for the visit and misses a game or two---what is more important????

I agree with Midlo dad except the part about going over the coach's head if he disagrees. If the HS coach won't bend then you just have to explain that to the college coach and try to work around it if possible.

Going over the coach's head especially one that is already obviously a bit insecure will most likely result in retaliation.

I am a little concerned about your wording where you say "visits". If you are assuming that making a visit takes priority over practice in every case then that's a bad assumption. Each visit should have to be considered on a case by case basis to see what is best for both the player and the program and where adjustments could possibly be made.

I think it is totally unreasonable of the coach to not let a kid take a visit to a potential college. We're talking a practice vs. a future. I agree with Midlo in that this is a feather in the coaches cap. What coach wouldn't want to say that his kids are recruited or signed? I know my son really looks up to the other kids on the team who have committed to a college. He would not mind at all if an upperclassman missed a practice to visit a college - especially if it was an invite. He would think it was cool that a teammate was being recruited.

Like all things, you shouldn't go overboard with it, but to miss a couple of practices for something like this shouldn't be a big deal. I would say go anyway and take your chances with play time.

bballman,
Gotta disagree. I'm all for the player putting the program first AND the program putting the player first, but even when the program doesn't put the player first the player still has to put the program first except in cases of potential serious injury, etc..

The reality is that a coach has every right to cut or bench a player who flagrantly disobeys a rule like that.

When does school ball start for you guys in Alabama? I know some states start fairly early in February, but in Virginia the first official practice is generally the last Monday in February. What I'm getting at is this...you should have at least several weeks remaining before school season starts. Maybe it'll be a hectic month, but I would try to get as many of these visits done now as possible. I agree with others that the coach should be more flexible, but this be an even better option for all involved. Just a thought...

It is definitely OK to enforce rules through suitable punishment.

It is NOT OK to have stupid rules.

It is also not OK to enforce stupid rules just because you have some mental health issue that leads you to have to strut around showing your power over others for no good reason. While most the vast majority of coaches do not suffer from this disability, we have all seen that there are bad eggs out there. And when they rear their ugly heads, their superiors need to be alerted to the fact that they have a problem employee on their hands.

I'm OK with trying to work out the visit with the college guys to work around the HS commitment. I took that as a given up front.

But if a HS coach took it upon himself to put one practice ahead of my son's college future, he and I would have a talk. And while it's not normally proper for a parent to get involved in team management issues, I consider this far enough out of bounds that this talk would continue, in one forum or another, until I won.

In 2007, Ethan Martin was an Aflac All American. He was also the QB on his school's football team. His HS football coach told him he could not miss practice to go to the Aflac game, or else he would be kicked off the team. Ethan went to the Aflac game, where he tied for the HR derby. The following spring, he ended up getting drafted in the first round (though as a pitcher) and got a 7-figure bonus.

It was definitely not OK for the HS coach to try to interfere with Ethan's baseball showcasing process. You can argue whether or not it would have made a difference to his future. You cannot argue whether the coach was being totally asinine, because he was. In Ethan's situation, the decision was not the coach's to make, and he was dead wrong to pretend that it was.

How did it turn out for Ethan? He went to Aflac, returned, and the coach did nothing because the truth was that he needed Ethan at QB. The guy ended up looking like a complete fool. And he would've looked like an even bigger fool if he had tried to make good on his threat.

Personally, if my son had to miss practice to go to visit colleges to choose which one he was going to attend, that would take priority over a practice even if my son were not on a baseball visit -- i.e., if he were just going on a standard college visit. Quite often those visits have to happen in March or April and there's no avoiding the fact that there may well be conflicts with baseball season. These are situations where you owe it to the coach to coordinate with him, but the decision on whether or not to go is simply not his decision to make, nor even to try to influence. It is a family decision and his job is to know when to BUTT OUT. The fact that in this scenario, baseball and possibly scholarship money is involved, only makes the situation worse. Under no circumstances should a HS coach be permitted to become an obstruction to a young man's future prospects or to his meeting his financial needs.

I'm not saying go fly off the handle from the outset. Approach the coach respectfully and on the assumption he will do the right thing. If he starts trying to do the wrong thing, though, then it is time for another adult to intervene and set him straight on what is his right to do and what is not his right to do. That adult might be a parent, it might be the AD or the principal. But if the guy simply doesn't know his place, someone will have to put him in it.

I like what MidloDad says.

Since 2B started playing HS ball, 2 different coaches have had a written policy concerning missing practice. 2B has missed 3 practices in four years, all with plenty of advance notice, none of which was a big deal.

I'm kind of afraid to ask this question, but this was my first thought. If the player is going to be a sure fire spring signee anyway, what difference does playing time on the HS team make?

2BMOM

we not talking playing time here---we are talking responsibility to the team and how to balance it with his own time for visits

I'm sure the coach, as a teacher, is allowed a couple of days off each year to participate in "professional development" seminars or the like.

This student's recruiting trip is a form of professional development and should be treated the same. It would be interesting to see the coach's reaction to being told he is not allowed to participate in any forums that enhance his professional future.

I know. This is a very good thread - some important stuff here. But some coaches use playing time as a threat for playing summer ball, playing fall ball, participating in off-season conditioning, and now this. If you've tried to talk with the coach and he won't be reasonable, do you call his bluff? And if he's not bluffing, how much of a difference does that make?

quote:

Originally posted by TRhit:
There is no reason the player cannot arrange his visits so as to not intrude on his HS baseball---most, if not all, college coaches understand and appreciate a players loyalty to his team


We run into the conflict with our travel team from time to time but if we are in the region of the school where we are playing we can usually work it our with the college coach so the boy gets the best of both worlds---sometimes it can't be worked out so the boy goes for the visit and misses a game or two---what is more important????

Well put TR!

quote:

Originally posted by CADad:
I agree with Midlo dad except the part about going over the coach's head if he disagrees. If the HS coach won't bend then you just have to explain that to the college coach and try to work around it if possible.

Going over the coach's head especially one that is already obviously a bit insecure will most likely result in retaliation.

This one outta spin it...

I agree 100% with Midlo

I agree 100% with CADad

I am from the camp that it's not someone else's business to do the dirty work. I would go over the coaches head, full knowing the retaliation is likely, and have, and would do it again.

We had a parent of a star fielder sitting in the dugout with the coach. The player truly was a star with the stick and glove. The problem was, Dad thought he was a stud pitcher too. So this kid got his turn in the rotation every time, in spite of dismal, putrid, pitiful numbers. I went to the AD, no satisfaction, went to the principle, no satisfaction, and my son, his junior year, only got a couple of varsity starts on the hill. Now I didn't care about a coaches decision about who pitches, but I don't care if the parent is Tommy Lasorda, he has no business in that dugout, it's simply wrong and there's no other way to see it. The reality of the situation is the HC didn't have the stones to tell dugoutdad that his kid wasn't good enough to pitch. Then the AD and the principle didn't have the stones to step in...in spite of a policy about no parents on the bench/in the dugout for anything...unless they are the head coach.

Every person must weigh for themselves the degree of injustice that would require action, however, in cases of gross unfairness...if not me, then who?

Parents in the dugout??? Wow, I can't believe that is actually allowed. It actually makes me chuckle thinking what our varsity coach would say to me if I showed up and sat in the dugout at any time...much less during a game!

There are very few instances where I advocate parental intervention.

The paramount one is anything affecting health or safety. Some would not take that so far as to deal with pitch counts/rest intervals, but I do.

Anything that truly relates to the player's future as an adult takes precedence as well. And I expect support, not obstruction, from the HS coach.

True instances of misconduct also merit parental intervention. And I mean REAL misconduct, not just doing things you disagree with. Example: A well known area coach lost his job last year for a glaring case of sexual harassment. He meant it as a joke, but he did admit doing it and it was far from funny. Anyone who thought that was OK should not be working with kids.

I have never heard tell of a coach allowing a player's father in the dugout. I don't know if I would cross the line over that. It would certainly be unusual and leave me scratching my head, but I think that may fall more into the category of how the team is run, which I would say parents should stay the heck away from.

Lets put it this was---College Coaches and Pro Scouts do not enter a team s dugout---it is simple courtesy of the game


We do not allow parents in the dugout even to bring there son a gatorade----give him enough to take in the dugout prior to the game beginning

quote:

Originally posted by CADad:
bballman,
Gotta disagree. I'm all for the player putting the program first AND the program putting the player first, but even when the program doesn't put the player first the player still has to put the program first except in cases of potential serious injury, etc..

The reality is that a coach has every right to cut or bench a player who flagrantly disobeys a rule like that.

I think I'll stick to what I said. I really don't think missing a practice is all that detrimental to the team. If it was me, I would do everything I could to make sure a game was not missed, but, at least to me, a practice is different.

The reason most of our kids (maybe all here on HSBBW) play HS ball is to get to college or beyond. If a HS coach is not supporting that, he is wrong. Believe me when I say that I am 100% for the team. I don't think my son has missed a single practice or game for anything since he started playing baseball when he was 7. Even the 1st year he played, he broke his wrist early in the season. He still went to every practice and dressed for every game. My family has split vacations because I thought it was more important for him to play for his team because he committed to them and they were depending on him.

This, however is a different situation. We are talking about the kid's future. Here in Georgia, preseaon conditioning workouts have begun. Tryouts are the 1st week in February. There really is not that much time for the visits even now. If the college coach is asking for a visit during the season, there may be a very good reason he can't do it now either. I really just can't imagine a HS coach not allowing a player to miss a practice to visit a college baseball program. As a 2010, there are only so many opportunities left for this young man. If he misses out, it very well could be something he regrets for the rest of his life.

quote:

I don't know if there's a standard, but the coach oughta support your son in advancing the kid's career.

Welcome raw ... dad! I agree with your "oughta support" thinking and all the other "rational, feel-good comments." But that's of little concern to H.S. Coaches in my "North Metro Area." I'm not saying I agree, but that's the way it is and every player & parent is well aware of the priorities.

Prime is a Senior and every year we get the same mid-December 4-page mailing from the Coach regarding tryouts, practices, school conflicts, Spring Break, other Travel team commitments, College visits/ recruiting, etc. With all those variables, 18 different players to consider, an AD that expects post season success, the Coach's personal resume enhancement need to win Championships, etc., your son's post high school opportunities don't factor much into his thinking! In our case it's real simple.
There are no outside conflicts allowed. In school conflicts are handled via a "conflict calendar" produced by the school. His letter clearly states that you SHOULD NOT TRYOUT for Varsity baseball if you can't commit to ALL practice and game schedules! He further reiterates all these points at the Parents meeting just after the team is selected, to drive home his definition of TEAM.

So you know what happens, kids make official School visits prior to tryouts and practice or on Weekends. They attend all required practices and scrimmages. They don't play on Travel teams until the High School Season, including playoffs, are over. They accompany the TEAM (not mom and dad) on spring break. They learn to put their TEAM first. They play in almost every post season Playoff tournament, they often play in and win State Championships (three in the last for years). They get recruited and drafted. Seems to work here.

Where I live, high school practices are not allowed on Sundays. We plan to use Sunday's whenever possible as days to visit or meet baseball coaches.

If it was my son, I would plan around the baseball practices, and if I felt we needed to do a visit that caused us to miss a practice, my son would simply suffer the coaches punishment. I certainly don't see this as an issue to take over the coaches head. His rule isn't really affecting my son's college future, it is simply affecting playing time in a high school game.

Unless a team makes the playoff's here in Georgia most games are over around mid-April.

I'd think the same for most schools nationwide for the most part.

Could he just wait until after the season and go?

Anything can be abused. But I dont think we are talking about that here. By all means a player should be allowed to miss a practice to go on a visit. In fact I encourage it. The school allows for excused absences for this as well. As a coach you should be excited for your player and assist him anyway you can.

If its a visit far away usually those are on the weekends anyway. If its close by it may be on the weekend or during a week day. Again we are not talking about a player who constantly wants to miss practice to take constant visits. Most players dont want to miss anything anyway.

Seriously you got a player who is being recruited and wants to go on a visit. You should be happy you have players that are good enough to be recruited. Dont be a coach that gets in the way be a coach that assists your players anyway you can. jmo

Interesting input all. Our practices start Jan 4 and go Monday-Sat. The season kicks off in Feb when Sunday practices become a genuine possibility.

In addition, we have baseball P.E. all fall where my son practiced 5 days a week. He also practiced all of June with the team. He did Travel ball at many top level national tourneys this summer and played ball all fall on another prospects team. He does hitting lessons and a lot of work on his own after school. He's played or practiced year round all four years of HS (including time on his own and time with the team).

He is being pursued heavily by several out of state schools so visiting will take more time than just a one day Sunday trip. Many are small schools, so it is more important to visit to get a feel for the school. It's not like at the large school where I went to where everyone could find a fit somewhere because there were so many people, organizations and things to do. At smaller schools, if it's not a fit, you are out of luck.

Prime 9: Schools started calling or writing in November and December as he was a late comer on the scene. So we haven't had much time to make many visits. I also have another son on a varsity winter sport and I have to work on Sundays which severely limits my ability to get him anywhere for a Sunday, Monday morning visit. My wife works M-F so she can't miss many Mondays. . .so while I admire your devotion to the team, at what point should your devotion to your son's future kick in? I mean in 3 months, HS baseball will be a memory. And in a few years, when my son is starting a career, will he be able to tell his prospective employers, "My education is not that great, but you should hire me because I was really loyal to my varsity baseball team?" Not to mention, scholarships are on the line. I wonder if his high school coach or his team will be helping him pay off his student loans should he miss out because he cannot make the visits? It's easy for a coach to make tough stances when he doesn't face any consequences.

I am coming late to this thread. It would be great if the coach had some flexibility. Perhaps he will rethink things. I hope so. That said, if he remains inflexible, I would do my best for a Sunday visit (even if it requires vacation time on your part -- perhaps your boss is more flexible than his coach). Flights usually can be arranged late on Saturday. Even a red-eye might work. Best of luck in a tough spot.

By the way, I have seen many other coaches take this position. Some remain tough; others give in. Some take no action even if it was earlier implied. What I would NOT DO is threaten the coach or go over his head in any way. It's not right, regardless of the coach's inflexibility. Make your decision and live with it. This stuff about newspapers and school boards is particularly ridiculous and does nothing but destroy programs and teams, which is indeed a very selfish course of action.

It looks like you are ready to go with what you have written. I would say make your plans and advise the coach of the dates. Put it in writing. Let him answer you any way he wants (verbal or writing.) Then take it over his head if he continues to threaten.

Any principal, AD or guidance counselor worth their salt should cry fowl to stand in the way of a young man getting a college degree. The next step is the school board and the newspapers.

Son had a pretty strong coach that did not like kids missing practices, but he always stood behind his kids getting their chances at the next level.

I understand your frustration. But if he wants to be a part of the team then he has to try and work it around the teams schedule to the best of his ability. There are ways to do it. How many out of state visits are you planning on making. How many practices is he going to miss?

And ask yourself this question what if your son was on the team and a team mate was constantly missing practice but still playing in front of your son who never missed a practice? Your first post sounded like a guy who just wanted to make a visit or two. Your last post sounds like someone who feels that the hs experience and the team is not very important to you. Im kind of confused on this one now.

quote:

Originally posted by Backstop-17:
It looks like you are ready to go with what you have written. I would say make your plans and advise the coach of the dates. Put it in writing. Let him answer you any way he wants (verbal or writing.) Then take it over his head if he continues to threaten.

Any principal, AD or guidance counselor worth their salt should cry fowl to stand in the way of a young man getting a college degree. The next step is the school board and the newspapers.

Son had a pretty strong coach that did not like kids missing practices, but he always stood behind his kids getting their chances at the next level.

I think this is bad advice. Nobody is getting in his way of getting a college degree. If he wants to make a visit, he simply tells his coach and goes. The original post states "it may affect playing time" not that he will be kicked off the team. Make the visits in January, and I'd bet that all will be forgotten by the time they play games. Or at worst he may sit a preseason game.

Funny thing has come up in this thread as well. A parent's boss won't allow him to miss work to schedule these visits. Should they be looking to go "over the head" of their boss to get the time off, or "go to the newspaper".

I also don't see why a HS senior isn't capable of making a visit on his own. In 6 months, is he going to be ready to go to college out of town, but right now he can't travel alone?

In no way am I defending this coaches rules and saying he is correct. But if the rule is out there in advance, players should have to abide by them or suffer the consequences.

What if a player wants to miss basball practice to visit a college for recruitment to a different sport? What if a baseball player wants to miss a practice to visit a college but is going to college for academics and not baseball? At what point should this coach bend the rules?

Plump when you cook 'em,

I was feeding the OP what he wanted to hear as he held to his original sentiment after several viewpoints. I thought throwing in the newspaper comment might make that pretty obvious.

quote:

Is this standard?

JonesFan;

I understand and am not judging just saying that from the viewpoint of H.S. Coaches that I know in our area, that response is, indeed STANDARD! The Team does come 1st and the "Official Line" is that there are no exceptions. Prime has signed his NLI, supported by and surrounded by both his Coach and Teammates. I know the Coach is happy for him but his earning a Baseball "scholly" and making personal College visitations is certainly not on the Coaches priority list! Number one concerns are to the Team and all it's members, the School athletic department that mandated certain performance thresholds in his contract, and to he and his family!

Good luck with your son. If the amount of physical visits will be limited due to time limitations (signing period begins in April to August so you have alot of time still if they want him, as you say)do more of your "due diligence" on-line and via phone discussions, regarding said schools.

quote:

Originally posted by Coach_May
And ask yourself this question what if your son was on the team and a team mate was constantly missing practice but still playing in front of your son who never missed a practice? Your first post sounded like a guy who just wanted to make a visit or two. Your last post sounds like someone who feels that the hs experience and the team is not very important to you. Im kind of confused on this one now.

You are correct, we do want to make a visit or two, possibly three. We are not asking to spend all season on the road. My opening question was genuine. The discussion got me thinking and provoked the last comment. A lot of interesting points have been brought up. Many, I hadn't considered. And to others: my Job is such that Sunday is my major day, game day for all you baseball coaches Any other day would work better than game day. And I've taken all the game days off I can. Yes he can go on his own locally, but mostly out of state schools are calling. But 17 & 18 year old's can't rent cars on out of state trips so we will have to go on some. Also, coaches are now asking him to meet the team and sit in the dugouts during practice or games. Those don't take place on Sunday.

In regards to the team comment: Team is important, I think some have a skewed view of team though. "One for all, but NOT all for one" makes for a bad team ethic--not to mention a bad Musketeer!! I think, if a kid was missing practice to go fishing, or hang out with his girlfriend that's one thing, but to miss to visit a college is quite a different thing. That is what most kids in sports dream of doing. That is what they are busting their butts for, and it impacts the rest of their lives.

I don't think any kid would care if someone is missing to go visit colleges. I never did. Nor have I ever heard of anyone who did. In fact, I agree with other posts, it's a good thing for the team. It's also life. Everyone else on the team knows that if they work hard and get as good or better than Jonny Q, they too earn the right to go on visits. If they don't, they have to stay and practice until they can. In work, those who succeed do better and are rewarded and promoted, those who don't work hard, don't put in the time or effort fail. If you get the job done and done well you go home. If you can't get the job done or you slack off and work half as hard, you pay the price.

And believe me, he's got a lot of teammates that spent their off seasons fishing and hanging out with their girlfriends, while he was busting his butt. He's got a few others who do work as hard as he does, and they are all excited for each other not ticked that someone is missing practice. Seriously, what kind of person would be upset at that? If they were, then they don't understand team and the coach needs to address that. "We are a team, we don't get mad when our teammates succeed. Team is family and we don't want to hold them back. We rejoice when our family members succeed we don't get jealous and hold them back."

And in regards to what folks have mentioned in several posts, visits aren't priorities for many coaches. They are concerned with winning, and satisfying AD's, etc.,. I completely understand (and I am not saying that this is my son's coach's motive, I don't think it is. I think he's just got the bad Musketeer syndrome). For these coaches, it's not about team, it's about job security. Kid's futures are not their concern, winning is. But is that team? Jonny needs to sacrifice his future so that I can be successful? Sounds like its all about me not we--all for one and NOT one for all. I think, a coach with that set of priorities needs to move to the professional level where that is the standard. This is high school and the number 1 priority of a coach is to help build character in kids, to help build young men and women into good people and good productive members of society. That is why parents want their kids to play sports. With that backdrop, get as many kids to college as you can, and anyway you can help launch a young person's future do it. Other coaches from other sports here do this, and their teams are very successful.

Jones fan - you make many good arguments but seem defensive to me. I am not sure why you even started a topic on it? Why not just go ahead and miss practice if you feel you are right in your convictions? Do you feel guilty in some way?

I'll give you my two cents even though it goes against your feelings on the subject. I feel practice and being there for the team is vitally important. Winners put the team above all else imho and if I were a college coach I would be looking to recruit winners.

I believe college coaches are looking for championship caliber players who not only have skills but can raise the level of their teammates by sacrificing themselves for the team. This is a trait that is learned at the lower levels of the sport imho.

For those coaches that want to recruit your son this spring, work it out with them. Tell them your son values his team and winning more than missing practice. I think you might be surprised the reaction you might get.

Offer to meet with them the day the season is over. Go over your schedule with them and see if there are any off days that may be accomodating. Offer to send them video in the mean time. See if any of them can attend his games. Offer to do all the visiting now before the season starts. Make it clear that you will do anything for them but one thing your son will not compromise on is his team. I think you might be surprised at how college coaches will react to that attitude.

Most importantly, this is not a zero sum game imho. I believe your son can meet all his current team obligations while creatively working on his future goals. Show his current coach and all future coaches that the team is most important to him. I believe that type of attitude will positively attract the type of future outcome you are seeking.

quote:

Originally posted by Jones fan:
I have a 2010 being recruited by several schools. He'll be a spring signing. His coach told us that it is unfair to other players for him to miss practice time to go on recruiting visits, and is threatening his playing time should he go.

Is this standard?

I am not sure if anyone noticed that you said he would be a spring signing, so therefore there may not have been no fall or summer to visit. Not sure why you didn't use the fall, but then again, perhaps the recruiting process has just begun for your son.

When son was in school, no player in in our county can be penalized for missing a game or practice for junior days or official visits at a college campus and is an excused absence. No student can be penalized for visiting colleges and also is an excused absence. Though the HS coach had a "no miss" policy, his hands were tied as to taking away any playing time for visits. The weekend should be your own time. You might want to check on the schools policy for this.

However, I do agree that your plans should be within reason. College coaches are more flexible, try to work out a solution.

You have been given some good advice, try to sift through it and see what works in your situation.

All,

This is as intriguing a thread as I have seen in weeks and it has obviously sparked good debate. This one interests me as JR is in a similar situation at a major D3 where he has a great baseball opportunity. We have just learned of his acceptance and that he more than qualifies for considerable academic support via competitive scholarships. As you know these require secondary visits and are rarely flexible. What I am speaking of is well in excess of the standard "you are breathing" scholarships most privates seem to offer in order to spend through their annual endowments...in JR's case, garnering these extra awards could make the difference in his ability to attend...

That being said, here are my thoughts:
1) The subject of leverage and loyalty seems to come up in all major sports. It gets argued to the point of silliness....how many times have we seen the SportsCenter headline...."player *** chastised for missing the game to see his child born....how selfish???'
2) For 14 years, most of these baseball boys have dedicated their lives to spring ball, summer ball, travel ball, fall ball, lessons, etc in the hopes of honing natural raw talent into a skill that gives them leverage with a university or the pro's. This is the once and rare time they need to feel reciprocal support from the very coaches [and teammates frankly] that they have sacrificed for so long.
3) Not sure who said it, but I agree that HS Coaches should cherish the fact they have kids that are generating this level of interest. Secretly they should pray that it doesn't interfere with his team schedule, but be reasonable enough to understand that his schedule, while sacred to him, is invisible to the rest of the real world.
4) I too live in GA and am very familiar with the power and strength of the N Metro ATL baseball machine. It is long argued that baseball is taken very seriously here. So much so that many HS programs in the belt between E Cobb and Gwinnett Cty contain a 50-75% annual saturation of college worthy players....most of which have forfeited everything to baseball by choice. Unfortunately, this saturation breeds amazing success for coaches and therefore allows for the policies of 'no exceptions' as you see in previous posts....are these kids putting the 'team' first, or the 'coach?'
5) Lastly, we are fortunate to have a son and a coaching staff that is loyal to each other, and grounded enough to recognize that in life exceptions are the rule....anyone who is responsible for someone other than themselves realizes this naturally....

In my opinion, nearly all thoughts on this thread are accurate and relevant because they all rely on your local situation. The reality is that extremely high level, dedicated athletes are required to sacrifice themselves to keep the machine running. They do this by choice and for my part, it is one of the main reasons I have such a great respect for the game of baseball. It is only when you highly concentrate players of like minds that the game is played at its highest level....but that's not what Jones Fan is asking is it?

On the advice of many on this site, I have turned this stuff over to my son to decide...he is capable, and if he's not, better to figure that out now!

bigboy:

Extremely well-written and interesting post. Thanks.

Great post bigboy

There has to be a middle ground here where the coach gives in some and the player gives in some. A coach who has a "can't miss" policy is wrong but a player who wants to go to many visitations or miss for this and that to help them get into college is wrong.

Only way to solve this problem is communication. The player sits down with the coach and they work out a schedule that works for both sides. Then stick with it that way neither side is caught off guard.

Myself personally I would rather this kid miss a practice than a game and try to steer them to do that. This way it gives the player a chance to go off and do his college thing and it gives the player who backs him up even more groundballs and BP cuts for next year to replace him. If this player has to miss we try to find a game that should be a win but if not then we live with it. We got 8 other guys in the lineup who should be able to perform to help us win.

It's all about the middle ground and communication.

My Coach had no problem with myself or other players having to miss a practice or even a game for a college visit. He understood the importance of college for all his players. Either if they were going to visit for a recruit visit or just academics there was never a problem with someone going to visit. Coaches have to realize that high school is just one step and the next for many is college which is more important. As long as a kid is not missing many games or practices it would seem not to be a problem.