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If my son left his current school, would I be "scaring" him for the rest of his life? Or should a parent be expected to sacrafice everything to help your kid pay for an education which in these times is not affordable?
My personal experience is that there will be no scarring. Conversely, if your son perceives later in life that his parents sacrificed too much, that will result in scarring.
40-some years ago, my parents and I were in a similar situation. I was a sophomore at a small liberal arts college, whose cost of attendance today is the same as your son's. It had been a stretch to enroll at that college, but working about 10 hours per week coupled with some scholarships allowed me attend. Then, the price of eggs fell drastically, and poultrymen, including Dad, began losing money. The decision my parents took was to wind down the chicken business, and astonishingly, to join the Peace Corps! This was a very wise move on their part--teenagers when the depression hit, they had spent their adult lives to that point being careful with money, but wanting to give their children the advantages that they hadn't had. I was the last of the 4 children, and this was an opportunity to do something else, and maybe do some good also.
My parents had effectively zero income, but possessed the property of the vacated chicken farm. So I wasn't eligible for need-based aid, excepting my junior year, during which a federal program briefly only counted income and not assets. My choices were to either leave the private school for a more affordable state school, or find a good paying job with flexible hours. I was able to find such a job, and I stayed at the private school, emerging only slightly in debt--about a half year's cost of attendance. I worked 35 hours a week, and gave up most of the structured extracurricular activities I'd been involved in. The midnight bridge games and the pursuit of coeds continued.
So life was different than it had been, but I was surely unscarred! In fact, I think the tradeoff amounted to a net positive for me. Furthermore, in retrospect, had I gone to a state school, it would have been yet another different life, but probably just as good. It's often said that college is the best years of a person's life. I don't know if that is precisely true but the 4 years I spent in college, under either circumstance, were wonderful.
My parent's lives became vastly richer. I'm not going to describe here what they did or the people(s) they touched during the second half of their lives, but I will always be proud of them and so pleased that they didn't sacrifice "too much" to make sure their child could continue an idyllic college life.
Since this is a baseball board, I suppose part of the question is: How much should parents sacrifice so that their son can play baseball in college? Before I became a parent my answer was simple. After high school, the time for games is over, unless a player can get somebody to pay him. Now that I have high school kids who conceivably could play in college, it ain't so simple!