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2016 LHP son invited to make 'unofficial visit' to one of the colleges of his choice for tour/interview/etc. Schedule can't be changed by the school for reasons related to their schedules (academic, not athletic).  This is not a group Junior Recruiting event, several of which he's attended.

 

There is a conflict with one of the boy's HS team's spring break tourney games. These games are local and are of record but do not affect league or conference standings. His mother and I are trying to reconcile him missing one non-conference game (he's their #1 and a team captain) to take advantage of this opportunity. Other schools have made offers to him but this is one of the two to which he'd commit very, very quickly. He's dedicated to his team and does not want to forego the game.

 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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OK let me make sure I got this straight - the college cannot change the unofficial visit due to academic reasons?  I've never heard of this but could be possible I guess.

 

Before we got any further the 10 million dollar question is what has the HS coach said about him possibly missing this non-conference / whatever game?  

 

Overall as a head coach I would wish him luck as he visited the school and welcome him back with open arms at the next practice / game.  This is part of our job to help them get into college either as a student and / or athlete.  Now if it happens all the time (or trying to) then we need to have a talk about how to schedule these things.  I've never seen a school not understand or work with a HS kid with their games.  But I also don't know all the details so more info would be helpful.

Very tough situation.  As a coach, it does weigh in that it is not a league game and I would be more understanding since it appears it cannot be scheduled at another time and future opportunities for our players are certainly of high importance.  That said I have a hard time understanding that there is NO other date/time option - most colleges would not expect a player to miss a game and would work out an alternative solution.

 

I think he needs to talk this through with his HC and get his feedback.  It is also very important how son handles this with his teammates.  Particularly as team captain, he needs to show that he is willing to do any extra work/duties/practice necessary to make it up to the team for missing the game.  Perhaps even a discussion among the team, letting them have some say.  He needs to make it clear that he would not miss a game if there were any alternative.  Of course, this should be under the guidance of the HC. 

 

PS - was typing while Coach beat me to it... what he said.

Last edited by cabbagedad

Make sure your son meets with coach to let him know why he'll be gone, then take the trip.  If the coach has a problem with your son visiting a college that may be able to offer him the chance to play baseball at the next level, then I would have a problem with that coach.

 

This is definitely something both you and your son shouldn't feel guilty about.  It'll be fine.

The boy doesn't want to miss the game. His HC was very supportive last year when, as a sophomore starter, he had to miss one game of the same tournament to represent his school in a statewide academic competition.

 

He has superb SAT/ACT scores and GPA. Academic considerations/scholarships are paramount in any package put forth by the school and this visit is focused on the academics, not just baseball.

 

It's a full day's drive. Flying is not feasible.

 

His mother and I want him to go, he's reluctant but will follow our advice.

 

Originally Posted by NotThatGuy:

The boy doesn't want to miss the game. His HC was very supportive last year when, as a sophomore starter, he had to miss one game of the same tournament to represent his school in a statewide academic competition.

 

He has superb SAT/ACT scores and GPA. Academic considerations/scholarships are paramount in any package put forth by the school and this visit is focused on the academics, not just baseball.

 

It's a full day's drive. Flying is not feasible.

 

His mother and I want him to go, he's reluctant but will follow our advice.

 

Sorry, I didn't read your profile before first post.  Also still a bit unclear on the event but assuming now that he can only make the trip during Spring Break due to the full day's drive and that is the only day in the week the school can accommodate.  Therefore, if that is the case and the nature of the tour is very important then he should go. 

At that point I go back to my first post.  It is very important how he communicates and handles things with his coach and his teammates.  If done properly, they both should understand and support.

Just had a similar situation... 2015 son will be attending a college in the fall to play baseball and we encouraged him to partake in their academic scholarship competition.  There were 3 different dates given to us to choose for when he would like to compete, and all 3 dates were days of HS games.  He did not want to miss a game so he contacted the college to ask if he could have special permission to have his interview and write his essay during a weekend admitted-student open house, since our family was already scheduled to attend this event.  They had no problem with that, whatsoever.  No missed school, no missed game, and only had to make one trip to the school.  A simple e-mail detailing the situation is all it took!

Originally Posted by redbird5:

I would have your son contact the college and inform them that in order to visit, he would have to miss a game.  I don't know of a program in the country that would advocate his missing a game.

Exactly!  No college coach/program wants to have the reputation of taking kids away from HS commitments.  It is a tough situation, and I would think it all depends on the style/demeanor of the HS coach.  My son's HS coach would not stand for this for a minute.  He is all about commitment to the team and no one player is more or less important. I respect that.  We learned this the hard way last June when my son approached him about missing a practice (we're talking about practice, man) to attend an Area Code Tryout.  We disagreed, but I respected the heck out of his view.  It is also a slippery slope, from the HS coach's vantage point.  If this UOV is OK, what about a kid missing a game for weekend travel team/showcase event late in the HS year, etc.  On the other hand, I do know other HS coaches who would think this is a great opportunity and be totally understanding of it.

Originally Posted by GHHS-2016LHP:

Make sure your son meets with coach to let him know why he'll be gone, then take the trip.  If the coach has a problem with your son visiting a college that may be able to offer him the chance to play baseball at the next level, then I would have a problem with that coach.

 

This is definitely something both you and your son shouldn't feel guilty about.  It'll be fine.

Totally disagree with this way of thinking.  He can make the unofficial visit at another time.  He should not miss the game.  This wouldn't go over well at my son's school.

 

One of our recent experiences, was an interaction regarding an Official Visit. The coach offering the Official, mentioned whether son could miss a practice for the visit, if it was on Friday.  He said if there was a game that day, they would fly him in on a Saturday.  So I would think that if the coach has the kid's best interest at hart, he wouldn't ask Jr. to miss a game for an unofficial visit.  There is plenty of time for that IMHO.

This is an unofficial visit.  How are they structuring an unofficial visit?  I thought this was against the rules.  Any other information etc. should be available throughout the summer when others take their unofficial visits. 

 

This coach is going to have to weigh the visit for one player versus all players that might be interested in college.  Suppose they all want to visit on non conference games.  Not good. 

Originally Posted by rynoattack:
Originally Posted by GHHS-2016LHP:

Make sure your son meets with coach to let him know why he'll be gone, then take the trip.  If the coach has a problem with your son visiting a college that may be able to offer him the chance to play baseball at the next level, then I would have a problem with that coach.

 

This is definitely something both you and your son shouldn't feel guilty about.  It'll be fine.

Totally disagree with this way of thinking.  He can make the unofficial visit at another time.  He should not miss the game.  This wouldn't go over well at my son's school.

 

One of our recent experiences, was an interaction regarding an Official Visit. The coach offering the Official, mentioned whether son could miss a practice for the visit, if it was on Friday.  He said if there was a game that day, they would fly him in on a Saturday.  So I would think that if the coach has the kid's best interest at hart, he wouldn't ask Jr. to miss a game for an unofficial visit.  There is plenty of time for that IMHO.

Hey, feel free to disagree all you want.  That's the beauty of this board, it's all about different (and differing) points of view.

 

It's also why Baskin Robins makes 31 flavors.

Does the college know the situation?Its hard for me to beleive they would not ask if you come will you be missing anything.Or whats your schedule can you come.Seems once they know theres a game they would back off and figure something else out.Why put a kid in this situation?They know these kids will do backwards sumersaults if asked.Just seems They would be the ones to step up and not put a kid thier interested in in this type of situation. 

Originally Posted by redbird5:

I would have your son contact the college and inform them that in order to visit, he would have to miss a game.  I don't know of a program in the country that would advocate his missing a game.

+ 1. Coaches like dedication and committment.  You guys can go on an unofficial any time.

The boy is discussing situation with his HC and teammates. If there is any problem with them we will leave immediately after game and drive through the night. It is a 10 hour drive. The date is driven by the admissions office, not the baseball staff, and cannot be changed. Period. It is also the date/weekend during which the school's team will be playing at home. This particular school has a specific, fairly rigid schedule for its application process.

 

He has never missed a team practice or game for anything other than an academic pursuit since he started playing this game at the age of 6. He would never consider missing a team function for the sake of a showcase or travel team. His other unofficial visits fell into the late Fall and early Winter and did not conflict with any HS events.

 

We understand commitment, as does he. That's why I posted the query.

.

Personally I would be very,very leary of not only anyone but, any school putting my son in this type of situation.Admissions or not.The HC does have alot of input/influence whatever.So its the teams  HOME series where the admissions can do whatever they have you do correct?The next/last weekend/Friday admissions can do its just the team is out of town correct?My 2016 is the type of kid if you gave him a crap sandwhich he would eat it and go without a word.But he would not have this.

Originally Posted by GHHS-2016LHP:
Originally Posted by rynoattack:
Originally Posted by GHHS-2016LHP:

Make sure your son meets with coach to let him know why he'll be gone, then take the trip.  If the coach has a problem with your son visiting a college that may be able to offer him the chance to play baseball at the next level, then I would have a problem with that coach.

 

This is definitely something both you and your son shouldn't feel guilty about.  It'll be fine.

Totally disagree with this way of thinking.  He can make the unofficial visit at another time.  He should not miss the game.  This wouldn't go over well at my son's school.

 

One of our recent experiences, was an interaction regarding an Official Visit. The coach offering the Official, mentioned whether son could miss a practice for the visit, if it was on Friday.  He said if there was a game that day, they would fly him in on a Saturday.  So I would think that if the coach has the kid's best interest at hart, he wouldn't ask Jr. to miss a game for an unofficial visit.  There is plenty of time for that IMHO.

Hey, feel free to disagree all you want.  That's the beauty of this board, it's all about different (and differing) points of view.

 

It's also why Baskin Robins makes 31 flavors.

I will, and I do...

Question for NotThatGuy:  Do you get the impression that an offer will be made to your son during this visit?

 

Question for everybody else:  You all understand that if the school wishes to make an offer, they cannot do it unless this 2016 LHP is actually on campus, right?  I'm sure everybody realizes this, based on the year of the player.

 

Just re-reading the input from NTG, it seems that the following things are factual:

- Son is very, very interested in attending this college

- School cannot change the date (as stated by NTG)

- Game is a non-league, non-conference game, over spring break

 

We are advising this family on what may be a potential scholarship offer (if I'm reading NTG's posts correctly).  I understand their son's hesitation to leave the HS team short, but I don't understand why everybody is advising against this visit.  As parents, we all want the best for our kids and do everything we can to help make that happen.  If missing one non-league game results in a college scholarship offer/commitment, then so be it.

 

I guess if you want to make everybody happy, drive thru the night after his game.  Seems a bit too dramatic for me though.

"You all understand that if the school wishes to make an offer, they cannot do it unless this 2016 LHP is actually on campus, right?  I'm sure everybody realizes this, based on the year of the player."

 

Not sure this is true.  My 2016 son received offers via phone (and I know other 2016s who have as well) last Fall.  In any case, even if an offer was made in person, on campus, it was made very clear to us via phone in advance that one was coming and they just wanted the chance to sit face to face.

Originally Posted by GHHS-2016LHP:

Question for NotThatGuy:  Do you get the impression that an offer will be made to your son during this visit?

 

Question for everybody else:  You all understand that if the school wishes to make an offer, they cannot do it unless this 2016 LHP is actually on campus, right?  I'm sure everybody realizes this, based on the year of the player.

 

Just re-reading the input from NTG, it seems that the following things are factual:

- Son is very, very interested in attending this college

- School cannot change the date (as stated by NTG)

- Game is a non-league, non-conference game, over spring break

 

We are advising this family on what may be a potential scholarship offer (if I'm reading NTG's posts correctly).  I understand their son's hesitation to leave the HS team short, but I don't understand why everybody is advising against this visit.  As parents, we all want the best for our kids and do everything we can to help make that happen.  If missing one non-league game results in a college scholarship offer/commitment, then so be it.

 

I guess if you want to make everybody happy, drive thru the night after his game.  Seems a bit too dramatic for me though.

I think everybody here gets it.  If the coach is truly interested in the boy, the offer will not be contingent on him missing an Unofficial Visit as a Jr. based on him fulfilling his committment to his High School Team. If it is an issue with the potential, future college coach, he may not be the right college coach.

GHHS & BucsFan: two offers to him from other D-1s were made via phone after some extensive on-campus face-to-face, and observation of his play by the coaches, They are in-state schools and know him well.

 

April 13-16 is D-1 Dead Period. No contact in person, on or off campus. Phone and emails OK. The date in question for us is April 9.

 

Any baseball-related offer the school we are discussing would make to him or any other player is totally dependent on admissions criteria, regardless of the player's abilities on the diamond.

 

We have Plan A, miss game if HC and team understand; Plan B, lots of caffeine-laced energy drinks, strong coffee and lead foot after the game.

 

As a former HS head coach, I was lucky never to be confronted with this question from one of my players being recruited. Different sport, different process, different time. In that era, early commits were almost non-existent, unlike today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Originally Posted by NotThatGuy:

 

 

Any baseball-related offer the school we are discussing would make to him or any other player is totally dependent on admissions criteria, regardless of the player's abilities on the diamond.

 

 

 

 

I am not really sure I am understanding. Unless your son is going to be offered from an IVY program or an IVY type,  what D1 school would offer BB scholarship  to a 2016 contingent on admissions? Or will it be an academic scholarship?  The usual and customary is that coaches offer based on the criteria set forth by admissions? You mean the coach wont offer unless he passes criteria first and this can not be done via phone or email?

 

 

 

Your ability on the diamond for most programs means very much.

 

Are you sure they are not putting the pressure on your son?

Originally Posted by NotThatGuy:

GHHS & BucsFan: two offers to him from other D-1s were made via phone after some extensive on-campus face-to-face, and observation of his play by the coaches, They are in-state schools and know him well.

 

April 13-16 is D-1 Dead Period. No contact in person, on or off campus. Phone and emails OK. The date in question for us is April 9.

 

Any baseball-related offer the school we are discussing would make to him or any other player is totally dependent on admissions criteria, regardless of the player's abilities on the diamond.

 

We have Plan A, miss game if HC and team understand; Plan B, lots of caffeine-laced energy drinks, strong coffee and lead foot after the game.

 

As a former HS head coach, I was lucky never to be confronted with this question from one of my players being recruited. Different sport, different process, different time. In that era, early commits were almost non-existent, unlike today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

As a current head coach who has currently 4 D1, 1 D2, 3 NAIA, and 1 D3 all playing in college or currently on the roster I never was faced with this.  All players worked around our schedule. 

Agree with several others.  Seems to be an odd situation.  That being said I always like to answer these questions taking OP at face value.  Assuming there is just no way to work around this date and it is a dream school for your son as a coach I would be ecstatic for him, proud of him and tell him to have a great time wish him luck and tell him if he commits bring me back a hat or something so I can wear it proudly!  As a parent...  pretty much the same thing!  Good luck.  Hope his dream comes true.

Yes, tough one indeed. Been there.

 

2017 sophomore was invited by RC to visit campus and catch a game.  Told son to check the college's schedule and come on a game day.  To let him know what day works for son.  Due to about six different factors (my work schedule, wife's work schedule, son's HS baseball schedule, etc.) we decided that X-Day was the only day to make the visit.  Only problem, was it was the same day as HS team's first preseason scrimmage. 

 

My first thought was, "it's just a scrimmage.........etc."  But as time went along, it just didn't sit well with me.  Son is only a sophomore so he does have plenty of time to make another visit.  New HS coach this year so it would not be best first impression with head HS coach.  And the whole thing seemed a$$backward$?  I was imagining new HS coaching saying or at least thinking, "So you are not playing in this scrimmage that I worked hard to schedule because you want to go for a visit to a school you MIGHT attend in three years and play baseball?"  After some time, the irony seemed ripe to me. 

 

I then imagined my son's performance in #2 preseason scrimmage upon his return and what if it was a train wreck performance?  Again, the irony seemed just too much.  A little bit of putting the cart way far ahead of the horse??

 

Again, son is a sophomore so he has plenty of time.  If he was a Junior I may have stayed the course and had son make the visit still and take whatever lumps came with the absence. 

 

Definitely a tough call though. 

Last edited by #1 Assistant Coach

NTG-2016son has made decision on his own....play in the game, then we hustle up the highway. Simple. We well realize that the circumstances are unusual, not at all like other schools which have invited him on unofficial visits during the past off-seasons. His mom and I are musing that he may seriously consider attending this school regardless of baseball. The boy has realizable dreams of playing at the D-1 level but more importantly is determined to follow a specific career path

 

Interestingly enough, one of the other schools which has offered him showed up to watch his first start this past week. They are steadfast in their pursuit. That is a positive for them with him.

 

Thanks for the discussion. Your opinions have been interesting, enlightening and helpful.

Last edited by NotThatGuy

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