The lows of baseball

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Yes indeed...tomorrow is another day iheartbb.



Use my left or my right one. Makes no difference. Both have plenty of Scotchgard™. Let those tears flow.



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Your boys are the players, and good ones too I'm sure. You are the mom, and a good one too. They will learn from a poor game and you will as well. These two rough games are tougher on you than them. They'll bounce back and you will too.

Your younger son has learned not to believe his centerfielder. That kid should have been yelling "Got room, got room...at the ER!" The two of them need to work on their communication skills.

Unfortunately this lesson comes at your son's expense, but his centerfielder hopefully learned that poor communication and poor judgment makes for poor results. He will learn from his mistake. The coach too. He should have applauded your son's effort instead of unloading on him. Hopefully he learned a lesson in dealing with his own frustration. He needs to teach his outfield a thing or two. The team will be better off. He knows it.

And drawing a walk is not bad. What is the result of a walk? A runner is put on first base. This runner has the potential to score. Good! All pitchers hate to issue a walk. It eats at them a little. On this day the battle between the pitcher and the batter was won by the batter. Your son did well at the plate. Three victories and one loss. That's a great percentage in baseball.

And how close was he to making that spectacular play in the outfield? He did everything right, but the ball wouldn't stay put. Would it have been better that he not try to make the catch? Without his attempt the ball still wouldn't have been caught. I know what the coach wants to happen. He wants your son to make the same effort as he did in the game. And he should want his centerfielder to be more helpful. Give your son a pat on the back. He did well.

Now for your older son. A bad outing on the mound is not good. You know it. He knows it. Something went wrong for him and his team while something went right for the other team. It all needs to be sorted out and adjustments made. Your son has an opportunity to learn. What is it that he should do differently? What is it from this outing that will make him an even better pitcher? He's a good pitcher. He wouldn't have been on the mound if he wasn't good. He will find a way to improve. And you will like that.

You served us well by sharing your stories with us iheartbb. It is nice to read the story of a player's or a team's success, but those stories always have a companion story of loss or defeat. That's baseball. We don't often hear those stories even though they're out there.

We all will be here so please let us know how you and your sons bounce back.




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quote:

Baseball, thrill of victory???
Agongy of defeat....yes

That is baseball. In order to play it, you have to have the guts to dig yourself out of a hole and overcome the self-doubt that all players encounter sooner or later. I do believe much of the game is mental. I don't watch much golf on TV but I always watch the Masters tournament. It was amazing how easy the game seemed for Phil Mickelson yesterday when he got on a roll and he was playing well. Conversely, even though he was hanging in there, the game looked much more difficult for Tiger Woods. Tiger is arguably the greatest player ever but without that mental edge of confidence, he is a good player but hardly unbeatable. In a similar baseball situation, I looked at A-Rod's playoff struggles all those years and everyone knows it was not an issue of physical talent. Anyone can play the game and love it when they are playing well and playing with confidence.

Encourage your boys! Encouragement is the key.

Amen. Baseball is such a tough game because one has to be able to handle all those ups and downs. Son #2 leads his college team in just about every offensive category. Yesterday they had a laugher, beating a conference rival 20-1. His day? He made the last out, in each of the first four innings. Gotta be a record. Finally got a hit in 5th at bat. As he gets to first ,the assistant coach says "Gee, I'd hoped you'd line into a double play to keep the string going".

To be successful in this game, you need ability and confidence, but also the ability to just laugh at the sometimes randomness of not-so-great days, and put them away.

Ups and downs part of it. One game, my son got two of the teams three hits off the best pitcher in the county and current D1 pitcher. They were two ropes he hit..Fast forward to the bottom of the 7th, game tied, runner on first, no out and the batter lays down a good bunt. Batter beats it out for a bunt sinle, runner rounds 2B, nobody covers 3B so runner goes for it. My son, playing LF this game, was in position to backup the play sees this and flies in to cover 3B as first baseman double pumps to 3B but nobody covering..Son gets there ahead of the runner but throw just wide and ticks off his glove and winning run scores..He came off that field feeling awful despite getting two hits which may have opened the coaches eyes that he can hit. After the game, the coach actually approached him and told him to not to worry about it because it was an aggressive play and with a better throw, it would've worked. Even though the firstbaseman was charged with the error, my son felt responsible for the winning run scoring. With hindsight, looking back on that play, the wise thing probably would've been to hold the ball and give the runner third base but when the play is right there to be made to get out of the inning, they went for it. Their #3 hitter was up next.

quote:

Baseball, thrill of victory???
Agongy of defeat....yes

Tomorrow is another day.

IHBB-

Man, I can sympathize. At the risk of sounding like Pollyanna, though, enjoy the fact that they are competing and they'll get a chance to do so at their next game.

Long story short, older boy is a freshman batting from the right side in a fall ball college game and caught a fastball with his face. Beaned. He had nine separate facial fractures and his left eye sunk about a milimeter. Being 18, of course, he "heals" in two weeks; try hitting, however, after something like that happens (he may have bat .200 after that and less than .100 in the Southern Collegiate League that summer). Though his coach was (and still is) very positive and supportive (top notch guy and a great program), he isn't producing, however, and drops to the bottom of the order on his college team and eventually "quits."

Fast forward to last fall. He quickly tires of playing golf with me and asks if I'll start tossing him balls so he can see if he can hit from the left side. 250 balls a day, four or five days a week for 5 months (and a former coach who "happens" to come around to see how he was progressing), he transfers, starts hot batting almost exclusively from the left side and is starting for another JuCo this year. Can't even begin to tell you how that will ultimately turn out, but I do know that he is a different kid when he is out there succeeding (and sometimes failing), but mostly battling and competing. As parents, I can't tell you how happy that makes us. Now, we enjoy every step on the way.

As I write this, it is Sunday morning on the east coast and the temptation is to attach some kind of metaphysical significance to the game of baseball. I won't; it is still just a game. It is, however, a game where the teams that fails least often usually wins. Likewise, the players that fail least often are usually the best. Tell your sons to be strong and get out there and compete like there is no tomorrow. And, as a dad, I urge you to enjoy the fact that they are becoming men right before your eyes, learning to battle and compete and "figure it out." Great stuff.

OBC

IHBB -
Thanks for starting such a great thread....

I second the "great thread". Very inspirational to read these stories. I have finally learned (son is a college soph) to really enjoy the highs, revisit them often in memory, and ride out the lows. Usually the kids are stronger than us parents (especially us moms) and the get up and cant wait to start another day of baseball.

Mine had an "0-fer" day yesterday but was happy because his team won. A boy on his team (in the duggout but not officially on team) has a degenerative, fatal nerve disease. He spoke to the team parents yesterday about helping to raise funds to research treatments for the disease. You see these kinds of things and you realize not to sweat the small stuff like a loss or strike-out. Just enjoy the games while they're playing as it goes all too fast.


And Woody, I didn't know you were a man of such wisdom, I thought you only "spoke" with pictures. Well done!

I officially "3rd" that! Great and timely post IHBB!

And I agree with you also CaBB about GotWood's sage advise. I guess his ventriloquist dummy knocked him out and took over!!

Man, this post has really hit home to son. Transfers to a potential JUCO World series contender for his Sophomore year. Works as hard as he ever has during the fall to hopefully help his team compete, win conference playoffs, and make a trip to Grand Junction, Colorado. Starts the fall out as #3 pitcher going into Christmas break. Comes home and goes to the gym every day so he can come back off break physically ready to go. After a couple weeks he gets the nod as #1 from Coach. Hard work paying off. Fast foward to February. Rains, snow, bad weather abound and most games cancelled, postponed, etc.

A week before conference games were to begin he develops soreness on his throwing arm shoulder blade. Sports Ortho tells him he has a strained scapula. It will require 3-4 weeks of PT. That in itself in JUCO ball is half a season as far as conference games goes. He has recovered and feels stronger than ever but now is being used in spot relief appearances.

So it goes to show players AND parents alike (especially those of you in high school) that things out of your control CAN and DO happen at the worse possible time. When you read on here that it is IMPORTANT that you find a school you would like to attend if baseball is put on hold for whatever reason - heed that advise!

It has been discouraging and frustrating to say the least when you know your son was expecting a banner year. But I've been pleasantly surprised at his maturity and demeanor in handling all of this. Through all of this he still wants to help his team win so they can go to Grand Junction. Will they? At this point it is looking grim for various other reasons but his determination has not given up the hope.

Only Lord knows what and where he will attend next year. But one thing is for sure - he now knows that life is unfair but even in times like this you still forge ahead, work hard, get stronger for bigger and hopefully better things ahead. It's all you can do. Fretting on the past accomplishes absolutely nothing.

There have many of you that have given me some tremendous support, advise, and encouragement through all of this and I can't express my gratitude enough to each of you.

Tips my hat to each of you -

YGD

Baseball, for most players is a game of failure and humility. That is why this thread is so pertinent.
To me, a thread like this makes the HSBBW more fully reflect what our sons are doing and how they are playing and competing. A thread like this makes the site real, in my view.
Since we are parents, we tend to naturally keep silent on the board when failure and humility are teaching their tough lessons on the field.
In contrast, good coaches love players who reach the lows of baseball and refuse to accept them, but use them to learn and motivate.
Just this week I read two quotes from two very good college coaches that relate to this so important topic and think they relate well:

1.)"You look at our program, we've got a bunch of castaways who weren't good enough to play at other programs," Hughes said. "We've got a bunch of guys from different places, but they all have one thing in common: They've failed in this league and gotten better from it."

2.)"It was impressive the way he bounced back after a real tough outing at Fullerton last week," said UC ***x head coach *** ******. "I think he showed a lot of character coming back with a quality start this weekend."
"Baseball is a funny game," said ***xx. "You can have a weekend where it seems like everything goes wrong and then play well. That's the good thing about baseball. It's a sport that's meant to be played often, almost every day, and it's a new day. It's a new weekend."

iheartbb - Been there, done that (and I'm sure we will again).

I thank you for your willingness to open up and share a little of the reality we ALL know. Better days ahead!

quote:

Originally posted by iheartbb:
Just thought I would counter all the good stuff everyone is reporting.
Sometimes things don't go so great, and we should report that along with all the good.

Younger son is not playing a whole lot, had three walks and a S/O his last opportunity. On defense
took a face plant into the LF wall,as his CF was yelling "got room, got room!" OOps didn't have room,
caught the ball but lost it out of his glove, as his face became one with the LF fence, lips and gums looked liked ground beef, but of course coach gave him sh!t. Older son gives up three HRS one a GS in the opening day of his conferece play.
Not pretty.

Baseball, thrill of victory???
Agongy of defeat....yes

Tomorrow is another day.

And that is the entire essence of why it is so exciting to me.

One day - Joy.
The next day - Agony.

The desire to go out there - and try it again is what the game is all about.
Actually - any competitive game - that is what makes it so exciting and so much fun.

Do you have the sand - after a very rough go of it - to stand tall - puff your chest out - and try it again.

With confidence - almost arrogance - and a burning desire to succeed.

Nothing else matters.

My son bombed out in the second inning on the mound. Today I asked him about it. He told me the only thing he recollects about pitching this year is the two previous outings and the first inning yesterday. Then he smiled. End of conversation.

Hard times in the neighborhood! Thankful for this site and the many many who know the highs and lows of this game to keep us (me) all on track. Thanks for starting this thread! Looking forward to hearing more stories of success!

Not quite the same as not having a good game, but going along with the topic "the lows of baseball"....

Three years ago my son, a shortstop/pitcher at a D2, complained about elbow pain---the trainer would not allow him to go to the doctor because he said it was "only tendinitis". I insisted that he go and what a surprise, his UCL was torn. He had the Tommy John surgery in July, '07. Another surprise, I wouldn't let him go back to that school, so he transferred to a JUCO to see if he could play. Happily, he could.

Ok. He worked really hard since his surgery to get to this year. He transferred to a 4 year college--LOVES the coach. This was going to be his year! Second week of the season, their games got canceled due to wet weather and they had practice instead. His foot got stuck in the muddy infield and the coach heard the pop 20 feet away. Complete tear of the ACL and a tear in the meniscus, too. So much for the season.

So yeah. The lows of baseball.

The only way you fail is by not having the guts to put yourself out there in the fight. You will never know the pain of striking out with the game on the line if you never play. But then you will never have the opportunity to drive in the winning run as well. You will never know the agony of giving up the winning run on the hill if you never toe the rubber. But then you will never know that feeling of coming through in the clutch for your team.

The bottom line is you have to be willing to put yourself in the fight. You have to be willing to risk the chance of failure to know the feeling of success. Baseball is a game much like life. It teaches about life. The respect that we have for other players is built on the fact that we know they are willing to risk failure just like us. Its knowing that they just like us had and have the guts to fail and come right back and risk it all over again.

Success to me is knowing you can look in the mirror and know you had the guts to risk it and have no regrets. You will fail at this game sooner or later. Everyone does. And you will succeed in this game if your willing to fail.

quote:

So yeah. The lows of baseball

wow, if it wasn't for bad luck he wouldn't have any. tell him to keep his head up, it can onmly make him stronger.

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Hey...how bad can it be for him? He's got me for a dad!




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got wood - you are a GREAT Dad!!With a stress-relieving sense of humor!!

play baseball - My heart goes out to your family. Wow.

And Coach May -Your post is right on. Life is meant to be lived, not recklessly, but with purpose and a persevering attitude. I always tell my kids, that you won't get a front row parking spot if you don't drive up that first lane. Sometimes you do, sometimes you don't.

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"stress-relieving sense of humor!!"

Our KitchenAid® works wonders mikamom. As you can see I just slice up that pesky stress (it all looks remarkably like zucchini) into manageable sized pieces and hit puree. After a half minute or so almost any type of stress is reduced to nearly sub-atomic sized particles. Then I pour it all unceremoniously down the drain. Not even any need for the garbage disposal.

So far the Metropolitan Sanitary District has not told me to knock it off. But I'm hearing rumblings that they may crack down on this practice. Something about their tax sieve not being able to easily collect taxes on this.

If they do snap the towel, I'll just take my stress slurry out to our time share at Yucca Mountain. I've got it all prepared for that eventuality. Every nook and cranny lined with lead and caulked with DAP® Tub and Tile sealant. Should be good for a millenium or so...maybe even an epoch!





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Started out like crazy hitting wise and now - the batting is suffering - something like 1 for 12. Still fielding well. Such is the game of baseball.

Okay, so after that first conference outing, it was followed by another that was similiar, gave up a couple of hrs, (this has not been in his bag of tricks/ hrs that is). Younger son gets the ultimate insult, catcher is put in lf when our starting lf is injured. Younger is 2nd string of. Alright who knows whats going on?

Older has his next start this last Friday.
Does really well, pitches a complete game, no walks.
He was dealing, and attacking, doing better.

Younger gets to show his pitching ability for three innings at the end of their last game, does well striking out his nemisis. He is a LHP and some scout showed some interest in him (needs to gain some weight..hahah)

Oh yeah, so younger son's team lost today ( he NDP)
coach is ****ed so he says they will all run until some one pukes, they ran for at least 21 minutes straight on our first warm day in weeks, so...one player pukes, passes out, can't breathe, loses consciousness and they have to call an ambulance to treat him, goes to hospital....dehydratio
More lows....

This is a very good thread and touches on what I think makes (or breaks) an athlete. Competition is notorious for creating as many L's as it does W's ----- Nature of the beast. How we handle and capitalize on the setbacks are as important if not more so than the way we celebrate the wins. I for one think society has some ills that can be directly attributed to our elimination of "the agony" of defeat in our children's competition/challenges and our everyday lives. The reward of a "participation trophy" is OK at a very young age but is much too common in today's sports. The humility of accepting government assistance should be part of the package to spurn the recipient to push forward but in today's society ----- an inconspicuous credit card has replaced food stamps and commodities allowing dependance with dignity. The stripes of the criminals of years past signified his/her inability to conform to society's rules but today most jailhouse TV interviews project criminals as OK people. So I say the bowed head and tears should remain to signify ones failure to win the competition. Second place means you lost! My son's college coach told his team (and instructed them to tell the parents) after a loss at LSU that he didn't want to see any smiles from the players/parents/or fans after a loss. There was nothing to smile about... I agree. Sacrifice is part of sports. Baseball can be very harsh and cruel but we know that going in. Each time we take the field we stand the chance of having some very bad experiences .... a very serious injury, a humiliating defeat or an embarrassing performance. As an athlete we do what WE can to minimize these but we should not guarantee their elimination lest we destroy the very heart and soul of competition.
Just my opinion.
Fungo

Losing is never acceptable. Simple as that.

good food for thought, fungo

I'll celebrate the wins if we win the Championship at the end of the season.

Until then - the only thing that matters is the next play and the struggle to win it all.

To go along with this thought of winning and competition....

The baseball coach and softball coach at the high school in which my children attend and play were both quoted at the beginning of the year in the local newspaper as saying their goal for the year is to win 20 games. If they win 20 games, then that is a successful season. Ok, 20 wins is good---if you play 20 games. Our teams play 35 games.

Which means both the baseball and softball coaches are pleased if they win 20 out of 35 games....or 57 percent of their games. I don't know where you go to school and if grade inflation is even an issue there, but I think that no matter what, a 57% is an F. F for FAILURE.

The softball coach also told me in a conversation that in his 11 years of coaching, he has never had a team which has gotten beyond the first level of play-offs. And when he asked me what I thought the reason for that was, he answered for me. He told me "it's because the girls choke". I have my own theory for this, of course. And it doesn't include the girls choking.

And oh, by the way, we are in a very weak conference....for example, the girls softball team just finished up a 3 game stand vs. a conference team and we outscored them 50-3...in a total of 15 innings. The baseball team had a similar result. I love when you really have to dig deep down to win.

quote:

Originally posted by itsinthegame:
I'll celebrate the wins if we win the Championship at the end of the season.

Until then - the only thing that matters is the next play and the struggle to win it all.

I agree but I think we are the top of the food chain because of our recall abilities of the good and the bad. Celebration gives us a chance to ingrain that moment in our mind and remind us of what we have to do in order to get to that state again. The hard part is to put that celebration behind us in order to get back to business. That same mind set is used for the "anti-celebratory" events.

"Celebrate" is also rated to what degree. I celebrate every morning I wake up with a pulse so I guess I celebrate after every victory..

We drove over 600 miles to see son "get caught looking three times! In four games the best he could do was get a walk. Couldn't even hit one of his classic pop ups either.

Question, after game son mentions his hand is hurting after hitting a ball wrong. Team has other catchers, DHs. Was he right or wrong to continue to play knowing he could not swing the bat properly, or should he have mentioned this to coach? I say if you aren't %100,especially batting, you take yourself out of the game. Opinions welcome.

Play until the coach says otherwise or until the hand is broken Never take yourself out of a game unless you know continuing to play will hurt you beyond todays game.

--Your replacement might get hot and you might not ever see the field again.

Its possible the coach knows there's a problem but still thinks your son is the best option.

I disagree CollegeParent... Although I understand the logic of what you said that is a self serving attitude in a TEAM sport.

If he was the starter then he was there for a reason and will return to start. If the sub gets hot...good for the team because he was not...

There is something to be said about integrity even in sports. At the very least if an important at bat comes up and you cant do the job; call time out and inform the coach. Let him make the decision on whats best for the team. Don't jeopardize the team if you cant do the best you can.

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"Couldn't even hit one of his classic pop ups either."

Oh my goodness Pop Up Hitter dad! Even your son's pop ups have vamoosed?

Do you suppose he has been visiting some of those tawdry websites? You know what I'm talking about. The sites where no good can ever come from them.


Like this one...I'll say no more.


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Or how about their site?


You can not find a more alluring pop up stopper than Grohe's© No. 4532400 with a very bright chrome finish.

Think about it...sunny day, bright chrome. Can you see the pitch? Again...I'll say no more.




Just some things to toss around in your head on that long drive back!




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quote:

Originally posted by GovernorTim:
I disagree CollegeParent... Although I understand the logic of what you said that is a self serving attitude in a TEAM sport.

I disagree with GovernorTIm

There is nothing self-serving about playing through a minor injury, a player must have confidance that he's better then the number 2 guy even on a bad day. A half decent coach can tell when a kid has a problem and its up to the coach, not the player, to choose the teams best overall option. A player requesting to come out of a game ties a coaches hands as the player clearly doesn't have the confidence to play.

PUHD Son may contribute more then his bat to the game.......

I dont often disagree with a point strong enough to post anything more than my first comment. And I dont disagree with CollegeParent often. I have seen some great wisdom from him/her.

But... There may be a difference in that I do not suggest that a player not work though a minor injury. Not at all; I get tired of the whiners in pro sports all the time and have great respect for those that work thru and play thru injuries. But we are talking about college and below on these forums.

As a coach over the years and parent of a player that has worked through injury I have seen both sides. If the player previously informed the caoch of the injury,soreness,queezy stomoch,blister or what ever and the coach made a concience desion to allow him to continue thats one thing. But to many players because of pride or what I still call a self serving attitude hide information from the coach and therefore not give him the chance to make an informed decision until it is to late.

As you pointed out "a half decent coach"... I have seen many half decent caoch's abuse a pitchers arm or continue to allow a player with a tweeked hamstring to continue and risk further injury. There are not many players that will tell a coach he is injured and cant preform at 100% because he is affraid of losing his spot. In doing so they extend or worsen injury to themselves and give thier team a less than 100% effort for a longer time. A decent coach especially in the youth ranks dont allow thier players to make those decisions and can pick up on some things a player hides.

Bottom line inform the coach of all injuries. Let him decide what to do, but protect your self from abuse or further risk of injury. You owe it to the team to be the best you can be. If 75% is still better than a sub then you have more to protect and more to offer. If you cant preform to that level its the players place to tell the coach and/or make that decision.

GotWood, thanks for cheering me up with your pictures, very funny indeed.

Both Governor Tim and College Parent have different views, one of my concerns is a hand that is used while injured will never heal properly. Team goes into post season play in three weeks. But College Parent probably has nailed it on son's thinking. He may be afraid of losing his spot. College baseball is most definitely about who is the hottest bat at any time. I intend to question son about his thinking in this matter.

You know... If I was a player I would rather a coach give me some rest a couple games to heal knowing I was injured. Rather than doubting my ability and benching me for my preformance thinking I was healthy.

As a coach I give my healed player a chance to get back in the game quicker than a non preformer gets a second chance.

Talk about lows...

2010 was just turning the corner on his senior season, had hit about .500 for the past 5 games and the average was headed up. Defense was stellar and he looked to be headed for post season accolades....

Game about two weeks ago now started off great, he was 2-3 with two bombs, one to LC one to R and the team was leading an important league opponent. He was brought in to pitch in the 6th from his SS position to finish the game. Team was leading 6-3 when he threw a pitch and the batter fisted it. It was a very soft line drive to his left and when he changed positions to catch the ball his R knee buckled. ****! We feared the worst...torn ACL. Fortunatley MRI results a week later told us that he had partially torn the tissue that holds the patella (knee cap) in place on the inside part of his knee and sgtretched some of the other tendons. Fortuantely he will be ok...100% very soon but what a downer to have that happen a little over a third of the way through his senior season. He has kept his head up and continued to support the team and is working hard on his rehab....hopefully the baseball Gods will see fit to help him get back to the field very soon.

J23

J23,

Wow, sorry to hear that.It happens in a split second.Can be a baseball ending injury just like that.My own son has been through some rough moments and suffered a concussion after a collision with a teammatelast Sunday..Very scary to see them hurt.

Hope your guy gets back on the field soon.

Thanks Fan... We did get some good news. The injury was not as severe as we feared. We have taken the non-surgical route and it looks as though he may be back playing in a few weeks! He has been choasen to play on a competietive travel team for the summer and is looking forward to that... His team has made it to the post season playoffs, just hope that he can get back soon enough to be able to participate...but wont sacrifice that experience for safety. He has the rest of his life to play....