Treasure It, Savor It, Appreciate It

Thanks for the post, Buzzard.  The messages never get old.  Great example of how things can end so quickly and it happens that way for so many.  Also, a great example of how, at that moment, light bulbs go off...  what could I have done better?  ... regrets...  give me a do-over...   Don't worry, in a day or two, those thoughts are likely to be overtaken by a whole bunch of great memories and a sense of appreciation and pride.

Then you'll have the awards banquet and have to start all over again 

Buzzard05 posted:

  Well, "the end" showed up last night and smacked me in the mouth.  I realize now how foolish I was in the way that I handled some things and wish I had a "do-over"...but that's not how life works.

Thanks for your heartfelt post, it is much appreciated.  As the Dad of a 2021 who finishes 8th Grade in a week, his high school career is just beginning, and your reminder is pretty great timing.

What would you do differently with a "do-over?"

One of the things my wife & I discuss often is trying to find the balance between "too much" and "not enough".  

3and2Fastball posted:

Buzzard05 posted:

  Well, "the end" showed up last night and smacked me in the mouth.  I realize now how foolish I was in the way that I handled some things and wish I had a "do-over"...but that's not how life works.

Thanks for your heartfelt post, it is much appreciated.  As the Dad of a 2021 who finishes 8th Grade in a week, his high school career is just beginning, and your reminder is pretty great timing.

What would you do differently with a "do-over?"

One of the things my wife & I discuss often is trying to find the balance between "too much" and "not enough".  

I remember when my son was heading from 8th to 9th grade. That's about the time I found this board. Now, he is heading into his senior summer of baseball. The kids he's played with since that 8th grade summer (he played for the high school that summer) are moving on. It seems like just yesterday, yet I have so many great memories of these kids over the last several years. Truly great kids with tremendous work ethic. They have been great mentors for my son. 

Next week is the banquet. My son doesn't know it yet, but he was selected captain for next season. A great honor because he will be the first player selected captain under this head coach (head coach chose captains in the past).

These posts are helpful to remind me to slow down and continue to enjoy the process and the road ahead. Best of luck to you and your son Buzzard.

Great post buzzard05!

Best advice I can give you is to relax, enjoy the game and realize that this is just a game. For most, this game always ends with a kick in the gut! Be sure to attend every game you can, support the whole team and know that each level up gets harder. Control the things that you can control, hug your son every time you see him and tell him how much fun it is to watch him play. No matter the results.

All the best to your son/family playing at the next level.

3and2Fastball posted:

Buzzard05 posted:

  Well, "the end" showed up last night and smacked me in the mouth.  I realize now how foolish I was in the way that I handled some things and wish I had a "do-over"...but that's not how life works.

Thanks for your heartfelt post, it is much appreciated.  As the Dad of a 2021 who finishes 8th Grade in a week, his high school career is just beginning, and your reminder is pretty great timing.

What would you do differently with a "do-over?"

One of the things my wife & I discuss often is trying to find the balance between "too much" and "not enough".  

I would say that I would back off a little bit in every aspect.  

Looking back I feel like, at times, I took the "fun" out of the game and made it too much like a job.  

There are different conversations that I look back on and wish we never had, because in the end it had no impact on where he ended up.  Sometimes I think I was more "coach" than "dad", and I wish I could reverse that.  It was tough for me when I stopped coaching him, and a transition that I struggled to make.  I should have just let him find his own way, and ask for help when he needed it.

I wish I would have celebrated the "small" things.  Too often I had my eyes on the "big picture" and didn't focus enough on the "small picture" at hand.  Those little instances are fleeting, and again, had no real bearing on where he ended up.  "Hey, that was a great <insert good play here>...but next time, do XYZ and maybe you can get a <insert better play here>."  I wish I would have just celebrated the "good play", because I was a bit of a buzz-kill sometimes.  At the time I felt like I was keeping him from getting overconfident and teaching him the game a bit better...but in reality, I was just dampening a happy moment for a kid.

Basically, my advice to you is just be a cheerleader.  Be his biggest fan, but be his support when he needs it (not when you think he needs it).

Thanks for sharing and great advice going forward to all. And good luck in college baseball (enjoy that ride too)!

Thanks, Buzz!  Great advice.  Son just finished his sophomore season, which means high school baseball is HALF-WAY OVER!  Seems like he was just a frosh yesterday.  

Wait until your kids graduate from college and move on. Then the mush will be, "I remember when ...." Then you will look in the paper for which high school or college game to go watch. 

Buzzard05 posted:

(I swore I wouldn't write one of these sappy posts...maybe it is just the whole "misery loves company" aspect of life...but here is mine.)

I made it through the high school graduation ceremony on Friday without issue.   It was bittersweet watching my senior end that phase of his life, but excited for him to begin the next one...and with the baseball playoffs still in full swing, high school wasn't "really" over, just the school part of it was.  I knew I would still be seeing the kids and families I had grown so close to for at least another week or two because we were favored to contend for the state crown, and being the only undefeated team in the state (or so I heard), I was sure that we still had some time together.

That all changed in the top of the 7th last night.  Our team was up 4-2, and even though the scoreboard didn't show it, we had pretty much been in control the whole game.  Aside from a throwing error in the first, the visitors never really were able to mount much of a threat.  Unfortunately for us, our Achilles heel that we had been able to dodge all season, came back to bite us.  All season long we would have big innings, but fail to capitalize with timely hits with runners in scoring position...tonight would be no exception.  The difference was, our pitchers had always been able to bail us out and close teams out...tonight would be the exception.

In the top of the seventh, the visitors strung a couple hits together and got within one run.  Then a fateful line drive to right field that seemed to defy gravity, sailed just inches over our right fielder's glove and went on to the fence to score the go-ahead run.  Add on another insurance run, and our fate was sealed.

That quick, in what seemed like a blink of an eye, I went from video taping what I knew was going to be an exuberant celebration after our big arm closed out the win, like he had done every other time before...to a numb shock that still hasn't left me.  High school was now officially, "over".  Chapter closed.

Those faces I had seen for the past four years would now become memories of some great days gone by.  Instead of the normal "Good-bye, see you Wednesday (or whatever day the next game was going to be)", our short conversations became, "Good luck, I know your son will do great in college."  Instead of a handshake or high five with some happy teenagers, I was giving out consoling pats on the back to young men with tears in their eyes.  Instead of, "See ya Coach" it became, "Thanks for everything Coach."  That quick...

I look back at this high school run fondly, but with regrets.  I wish I had truly enjoyed the ride with my son and not taken things so "seriously".  When my son was a freshman, sophomore, even a junior it seemed like "the end" was just a mythical "thing" people talked about...something so far off, that it wasn't even real.  Well, "the end" showed up last night and smacked me in the mouth.  I realize now how foolish I was in the way that I handled some things and wish I had a "do-over"...but that's not how life works.

My purpose in this post is two-fold.  The first, is just to try to deal with this "grief" (for lack of a better word) that I am dealing with today at work.  The second, is to reiterate what has been said so many times on this board (much more eloquently than this), four years goes by very fast.  If you are fortunate to still have some time left with your HS athlete...treasure it, savor it, appreciate it, because it really will be over before you know it.  No more, "Bye dad, I'm going to practice."...no more, "Hey, you need a water bottle?"...no more high school baseball.

I am fortunate in that my son is going to play in college, so hopefully things work out and I still get to see him on the field.  However, I am certain that will fly by as well.  I know I am going to try to back off and truly try to enjoy every pitch, because you never know when "the end" will decide to show up.

Thank you for posting.  hasn't hit me yet, I'm sure it will when we drop him off in early July.

Man, this is starting to hit home with me as my 2020 is just finishing up his freshman year. What a quick year it has been. I keep telling myself to just enjoy the ride and it is so hard because I want him to succeed sooooo bad. But even if he does end up playing at the next level, that too, will be over some day and it's really all about him succeeding in life. Baseball is just one part of it and that's the thing that I have to keep in perspective.

Thanks for starting this post and sharing openly. Keep the posts coming everyone.

My son was home from college this past weekend and brought his room mate with him. They had both tried to walk on and the roommate was a recruited walk on. Neither made the team for various reasons. We were all sitting there before dinner and they both asked if I would throw them some BP in the backyard cage. Brought back a lot of memories. Enjoy every minute!    

Nice post!  It does go sooo fast!

Buzzard05 posted:

(I swore I wouldn't write one of these sappy posts...maybe it is just the whole "misery loves company" aspect of life...but here is mine.)

I made it through the high school graduation ceremony on Friday without issue.   It was bittersweet watching my senior end that phase of his life, but excited for him to begin the next one...and with the baseball playoffs still in full swing, high school wasn't "really" over, just the school part of it was.  I knew I would still be seeing the kids and families I had grown so close to for at least another week or two because we were favored to contend for the state crown, and being the only undefeated team in the state (or so I heard), I was sure that we still had some time together.

That all changed in the top of the 7th last night.  Our team was up 4-2, and even though the scoreboard didn't show it, we had pretty much been in control the whole game.  Aside from a throwing error in the first, the visitors never really were able to mount much of a threat.  Unfortunately for us, our Achilles heel that we had been able to dodge all season, came back to bite us.  All season long we would have big innings, but fail to capitalize with timely hits with runners in scoring position...tonight would be no exception.  The difference was, our pitchers had always been able to bail us out and close teams out...tonight would be the exception.

In the top of the seventh, the visitors strung a couple hits together and got within one run.  Then a fateful line drive to right field that seemed to defy gravity, sailed just inches over our right fielder's glove and went on to the fence to score the go-ahead run.  Add on another insurance run, and our fate was sealed.

That quick, in what seemed like a blink of an eye, I went from video taping what I knew was going to be an exuberant celebration after our big arm closed out the win, like he had done every other time before...to a numb shock that still hasn't left me.  High school was now officially, "over".  Chapter closed.

Those faces I had seen for the past four years would now become memories of some great days gone by.  Instead of the normal "Good-bye, see you Wednesday (or whatever day the next game was going to be)", our short conversations became, "Good luck, I know your son will do great in college."  Instead of a handshake or high five with some happy teenagers, I was giving out consoling pats on the back to young men with tears in their eyes.  Instead of, "See ya Coach" it became, "Thanks for everything Coach."  That quick...

I look back at this high school run fondly, but with regrets.  I wish I had truly enjoyed the ride with my son and not taken things so "seriously".  When my son was a freshman, sophomore, even a junior it seemed like "the end" was just a mythical "thing" people talked about...something so far off, that it wasn't even real.  Well, "the end" showed up last night and smacked me in the mouth.  I realize now how foolish I was in the way that I handled some things and wish I had a "do-over"...but that's not how life works.

My purpose in this post is two-fold.  The first, is just to try to deal with this "grief" (for lack of a better word) that I am dealing with today at work.  The second, is to reiterate what has been said so many times on this board (much more eloquently than this), four years goes by very fast.  If you are fortunate to still have some time left with your HS athlete...treasure it, savor it, appreciate it, because it really will be over before you know it.  No more, "Bye dad, I'm going to practice."...no more, "Hey, you need a water bottle?"...no more high school baseball.

I am fortunate in that my son is going to play in college, so hopefully things work out and I still get to see him on the field.  However, I am certain that will fly by as well.  I know I am going to try to back off and truly try to enjoy every pitch, because you never know when "the end" will decide to show up.

I can definitely feel your pain.  In 2012 our son was a senior and his HS team enjoyed a special season.  Finished the regular season in a three way tie for first place in the district, but when on to win the district tournament - son had a crucial hit in the 7th that tied the game.  This was the first HS baseball district crown in 25 years.  They went on to get through regional's and made it to the state quarterfinals.

The quarterfinal game was tense.  We had our ace on the mound (had been drafted earlier that day by the Rays), but he was struggling.  Despite giving up 9 walks, we only trailed by 2 going into the top of the 6th inning.  Then somehow our boys scored three runs - a towering HR, a hit and a few errors and we were clinging to a one run lead going to the bottom of the 7th (we were the visitors).   Coach removes the ace (127 pitches after 6 innings) and puts in our reliever.  We weren't worried as the reliever had been lights out in most of his appearances.   We're pretty sure he can do this.  He strikes out the first batter. (our hopes are getting higher)  Narrowly walks the 2nd batter. (ruh-roh!)  Has the 3rd batter on his heals, but the batter laces a dying liner that our RF just misses.  Relay is good, but catcher just misses tagging the runner at home.  Game tied. (Oh crap!).  Next batter hits a blooper over SS and that's it.   The season over in a blink of an eye.  Lots of tears and stunned disbelief.  Many were certain they were destined to win it all.

A long wait before son finally leaves the dugout (he was the last one out).  Hugs Mom, sister and then me.  When gets to me he loses it - I can hear him crying softly.  Only thing I can tell him is "It's okay, you gave it your best,  Legion ball awaits and then it's off to college ball (JuCo)."

Like you we were fortunate that we knew it wasn't his last game and he would be playing college ball.  But for some of the other seniors, it was their last game of organized ball.

Yes, by all means whatever sport your child participates in at the HS level, take the time to enjoy it.  You never know when it will be the last one.  And four years goes by quicker than you think.