What is "the dream"?

"The Dream" is whatever one wants it to be. It might be broad (successful job, gorgeous spouse, financial security), it it might be more specific.

My son's dream is to play MLB...and that is my dream for him. Yeah...I am "one of those" who partially lives through his son and I do not apologize one bit.

My dream is to get "that" phone call..."Dad...they called me up...be in (name of city) tomorrow." The thought of that call brings tears to my eyes. I still tear up from the scene in "The Rookie" when Morris/Quade walks into the locker room and sees his jersey with his name hanging in the locker.

Realistically, my son wants to play baseball for money SOMEWHERE...whether it be MiLB or Indy ball. He KNOWS he can achieve that.

As a parent, I have felt it my duty to help my son in chasing his dream. I could not bear the "what if I had provided this, or done that" scenario...so extra money has been spent and trips have been taken. Call me a helicopter parent...but if my son has a dream...it is my dream that he achieves his dreams.

That's as honest as I can put it, gang. In the end...I think WE ALL are "Living the Dream" in one way or the other.

Great topic, Fungo!

Fungo, that question is an ironic thing..apparently the dads dream didn't make the kids dream. My youngest dreams of..no he's driven to play in the bigs..it is a quest, whereas my eldest he had a dream too...back in 1997 we had horrendous fires that swept Florida...forced the evacuation of entire counties (Flagler to the south of us) and we were threatened (I had a sprinkler on the roof and fire a thousand yards to the north and about 500 yards south..smoke everywhere (It starts to effect you mentally living in an envirnment like that for days on end). Well my then 17 year old was aimlessly working to get out of high school (Hated it and it's structure), he was more interested in the outdoors (We live off of the St. Johns river and he was a river rat)..I called it stump jumpin , well anyway his momma got to actually see the moment, he was walking out to his truck and it was like a bolt struck him..or cupids arrow or whatever..he jumped into the air and kind of did a victory dance, looked at his mom and said, "I am gonna be a wildlands firefighter!" Now we only had the dream that we wanted to help him get to where ever he wanted to be in life..no inkling it would be this service to his fellow man..but I guess my point is that it isn't our dream..it's his and bless him for it..a daggone shame your friend couldn't find the joy that his son was able to reach the spot in the stars set for him..it is undescribable to have the security that the kid is where he's supposed to be.

Cool post JT. I would say what my son's dream is but I am so supersticious about it, I don't want to jinx him

Seriously, it is an interesting question:

quote:

Can you tell me what the "dream" is?

Kind of a human nature type of question and perhaps goes to the issue of contentment. Most people say they want to play in the big leagues but what they really mean imho is that they want to star in the big leagues. I doubt many people want to get called up so they can battle the Mendoza line and get booed by the home fans. Also, I don't think some realize how competitive the upper levels of the game are and the committment that it entails which might indeed take some of the fun out of it.

The young man who raised this question in Fungo's question provides an interesting commentary on American society. There are many people out there who make a good living in a good profession but hate what they do. I sense that in this case. It does not sound like the young man likes what he is doing. That is where true wealth comes from - contentment in knowing that you are doing what you love to do regardless of how many accolades you get or how much money that you make. One coach that my son had told him that at the upper levels of the game "They make you lose your love of the game" Apparently, he was referring to the amount of repetition and practice involved at competing at those levels. I told my son that if that ever happens, that if you feel it is an obligation rather than a passion, then it is time to get out.

They asked Dan Marino once if he would trade his long career for a Super Bowl ring. Without hesitation, he said the long career was more important to him than a short cup of coffee with a ring. The dream is all in how someone perceives it to be.

quote:

I then commented that I KNEW his son was doing VERY well since I had just seen him on TV playing MLB. He quickly said: "NO!" He said he wished his son had done anything other than baseball. He said the uncertainty was pure h---. "I wished he would have been a ditch digger rather than play baseball". Pretty strong words coming from the father of a MLB player. I'm sure the player does not share his father's sentiments.

So it sounds like the son doesn't necessarily view things the same way his father does. Fungo, you commented: "I do wonder why a parent would feel this way." I do not know this father, but perhaps he is allowing himself to be ruled by his emotions and living moment by moment rather than looking at the big picture. A moment-by-moment philosophy and emotion-driven life can result in depression/discouragement at each failed at bat or error and anxiety about when/if the son will be "demoted." Yes, the "highs" are great when there is success, but successful plays or at at bats are fleeting and the roller coaster car can frequently swoop very low. I have been there before and let me tell 'ya, it is not a fun place to be!

I read an interesting article about people who have won lotteries. Kind of amazing how often they ended up unhappy. Some actually ended up broke.

While Fungo's friend might have been exagerating a little, I absolutely understand where he was coming from.

Watch out for what you wish for. You might get it!

IMO Dreams are very important, but dreams can be replaced by new dreams.

Thought I'd share a little Craig Morgan this morning..

quote:

Eight years old wearing his daddy's hard hat
He grabbed the water hose
Says he saw the fireman do it like that
His wagon was his ladder truck
He pulled it around, and at the top of his lungs
He'd make a fire engine sound

In The Dream
He is more than just a hero
More than anything he ever wanted to be
In The Dream
There's a world that lasts forever
And life is so much better than it seems
Close your eyes you can be anything
In The Dream

Fumbling through the attic
She found her mother's old wedding dress
She said someday she'd wear it
And wouldn't mama be impressed
She can just about imagine what everyone would say
When her knight in shining armor comes to carry her away

In The Dream
She's as pretty as a picture
More than anything she ever wanted to be
In The Dream
There's a world that lasts forever
And life is so much better than it seems
Close your eyes you can be anything
In The Dream

On the one side of the isle
Sits all her family
On the other side are all his friends from Engine 53
When she looks at him
I wonder if he knows
To her he's still the boy she met 20 years ago

In The Dream
He's more than just a hero
She pretty as a picture
Like they wanted to be
In The Dream
There's a world that lasts forever
And life is so much better than it seems
Close your eyes you can be anything
Close your eyes you can be anything
In The Dream

http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/morgan-craig/in-the-dream-3239.html

If you can find the song, listen to it-- the lyrics don't do as much..


My dream growing up was to play Major Leauge Baseball. Most players that is a dream of theirs.

Now my dream is to help young athletes to achieve theirs goals through strength and conditioning and athletic training. Maybe someday I'll end up in a Professional baseball dugout or an NFL sideline like PG mentioned in another thread. I'd be on Cloud Nine if the athletes I help reach their goals whatever they may be. And I'd be happy too if I make it "big" someday

Better Question---- whose dream is it?

As usual, Fungo asks a really great question!

I thought about it all morning, and I really don't know if I have a good answer. I have about 20 answers!

No need to go through them all. But in short, I think its important to have both a long term "dream" and a few just-down-the-road "dreams." If baseball is a big part of your dream, some short term dreams might be making your HS varsity baseball team...then being a starter...then winning a league championship...then playing beyond HS, etc..., etc...

quote:

IMO Dreams are very important, but dreams can be replaced by new dreams.

This comment by PG is a strike right over the middle of the plate. Speaking only about myself...I once dreamed to be an MLB player. When that wasn't going to happen, I dreamed to be a (paid-for-a-living) coach. When that wasn't going to happen, I dreamed of coaching my kids playing baseball. BINGO! I have no regrets...I'm a happy man.

I know a pretty good player that quit playing after two years in the low minors of the Rockies farm system. His complaint was that there was such a division between the hispanic speaking players and the english speaking players that there was no team unity. Players were always coming and going, and it was very cut-throat to begin with, but the division of the team in a team sport took all his desire out of playing baseball. It was his dream to play baseball until he got there and realized it wasn't what he dreamed of.

He told me he would never advise a kid to go straight to the majors out of high school unless you are getting 1st or 2nd round money. Even then he thinks college would be better. He would go JC if the grades weren't good enough for a 4-year school, just to minimize the time spent in the low minors.

JT,
now that was an honest post. Probabaly a lot of parents have that dream for their son somehwere deep inside.

quote:

Originally posted by JT:
My son's dream is to play MLB...and that is my dream for him. Yeah...I am "one of those" who partially lives through his son and I do not apologize one bit.

My dream is to get "that" phone call..."Dad Mom...they called me up...be in (name of city) tomorrow." The thought of that call brings tears to my eyes....

As a parent, I have felt it my duty to help my son in chasing his dream. I could not bear the "what if I had provided this, or done that" scenario...so extra money has been spent and trips have been taken. Call me a helicopter parent...but if my son has a dream...it is my dream that he achieves his dreams.

That's as honest as I can put it, gang. In the end...I think WE ALL are "Living the Dream" in one way or the other.

I have extracted JT's thoughts that mirror mine. Granted, there are other dreams my son has ... to maintain a wonderful marriage with his beautiful wife, to have a family (he wants 10 ... she says "I don't think so"), to finish his degree and perhaps coach at the high school or college level. He has told me more than once, with all the health issues his father-in-law and I have with beating our cancers, that he would walk away from the game in a minute if he needed to be with us. But as it stands, he doesn't need to be here and we have both told him that we dream of his getting his dream before he hangs up his cleats.

Whatever he dreams ... I am there to help him catch them if I can, as is his father, wife, and all who love him.

Here, there are a lot of dreams, perhaps summed up in the phrase 'playing at the next level'. Pre-hs, it's making the hs team, then varsity, then starter, then college/college-with-a-scholly, maybe D1, maybe top 50/25/10 D1, then college starter....

Where the player is suggests the next dream.

The goalposts (to mix my sports --- or home plate?) keep moving.

But The Dream, IMO, is to play pro ball.

When my son signed as an NDFA, he said, "No matter what happens from here, I've achieved my dream: I can always say I was a pro ballplayer."

But once the players are playing in MiLB, the dream moves again. Advancement, PT, just hanging on are all involved. I would imagine all MiLB players are relieved to see the ST package show up; that's how uncertain life is as a minor league ballplayer. 5% will see a day of MLB play; less than 3% will have a career. Appalling odds.

When my son was released in July, he was surprised to find himself both disappointed and relieved. Being there but playing little and catching endless bullpens --- not exactly The Dream (although it beats never getting there).

Even with that experience, The Dream was still alive, and he was fortunate to get picked up by the Pirates (insert Pirates joke here ) Along the way, he's talked to all ranges of players: organizational guys who still harbor the hope, AAA guys who worry they're Quad A, puppies who are sure they'll have a long MLB career. Established MLB players hanging on for one more year (that's right, Jimmy, I'm talkin' 'bout you! )

Given that background, the dream moves just as much in MLB. The September callup dreams of a career. The bench/utility/bullpen guy dreams of a starting role. The starter dreams of postseason play. Everybody dreams of a WS ring.

And parents of ballplayers dream of security.

Might as well dream of puppies depositing chocolate ice cream.

Your parent-friend needs to learn to enjoy the moment!

I hope my son can read this someday and say, 'Yes, Dad...I was lucky, and that's how it was.' This is my dream for him.

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

May God be with you and bless you:
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings.
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.

May the road rise up to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home
And may the hand of a friend always be near.

May green be the grass you walk on,
May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.

Fungo,
I had a similar conversation last night. One of my sons teammates Dad was a long time MLB reliever who retired after '07. The conversation was about his sister who said there was no way in heck she would date/marry a ball player after seeing what her brothers went through. Eight months on the road, never knowing if you are going to be on a team, years of work before you ever get a chance, media, fans, etc...

One persons dream is anothers nightmare.

quote:

The goalposts (to mix my sports --- or home plate?) keep moving.

As opposed mto the umpire's strike zone, right?

Whose dream is it???

PGStaff:

quote:

While Fungo's friend might have been exagerating a little, I absolutely understand where he was coming from.

Watch out for what you wish for. You might get it!

Playing the game is a Dream.

Playing the Game at the Highest level, under the media scrutiny.
That could be a nightmare.

Is the Player prepared for that, can they handle that part of the game.
Can the Parent handle that part of there players Dream.

EH

I can see where the player's parent would make that comment. The road to MLB is not an easy one, so often parents have to sit by and watch their son's struggle to climb the ladder. Not all days are sunny ones. This is a hard profession to be in, to us, we just see the glamour of the profession. Most of us (including myself) have no clue what personal sacrifices have to be made for "the dream". Those sacrifices can range from anything to injury and long recovery, to putting off your personal life, fans and press beating you up for no reason or for a reason, your agent not being 100% on your side, people only caring about you because they think you are rich or maybe rich someday, away from your family for weeks on end, etc.
Now many of you may say, "my son would sacrifice anything for a chance to play proball". And they probably would, all while you are watching from the sidelines and eating yor heart out at the same time.
Orlando brings up some very important stuff, once you get to know some of the guys who have been hanging around for awhile and heard their stories, you realize just how difficult this profession is.
I recently spoke to a former milb player who found out right before he was to be called up that he had a serious injury that ended his career. I told him about the HSBBW, I hope that he comes along to tell us about his life and share with us his experiences someday.

My good friend and current Sheriff in Durham County once told me a story.

When I was a police officer I was miserable. All I could think about was making Corporal. When I made Corporal I was miserable because all I wanted to do was make Sergeant. When I made Sergeant I was miserable because all I ever wanted to do was make Captain. I woke up one day after 25 years and realized I had spent my whole career miserable trying to make it to the next promotion. Now I am getting ready to retire and I would do anything to be a police officer again.

I think for parents it can be the same way for us. When our kid is in LL we just want him to make All Stars. The regular season is an after thought we just got to make All Stars. Then we get to Middle School. Man I cant wait until HS , I just hope he makes varsity. ETC ETC. It can be a grind for the parents.

Then your kid reaches a pinnacle in his career and you know how bad he wants it and how bad you want it for him. And then everytime you get to the top of one mountain there is another mountain to climb. I think its very important in my opinion to learn to enjoy the moment. Learn to enjoy that game that at bat that outing on the hill. Thinking ahead and wanting the next step while your in the moment and the next thing you know is you missed the moment you were in.

To me its all about being the best you can be and getting everything you could have gotten out of the game. Living in the moment and understanding that at the end of the day they will spend way more of their life as you son , a husband , a father than they will a ball player. Have fun with the baseball and enjoy every moment. And understand that it will come to an end one day. And it will not be the end of the world when it does.

Coach May good point. Enjoy the present, the years fly by so quickly.

Thats a really good point Coach May. And also for TPMs son, in my eyes he made it, if he never makes it to the bigs as far as TV etc, he still made it to the majors and that in itself is a great accomplishment.
My son has his first fall ball scrimmage tomorrow and were going. Just to watch his first college exp. on the field. I want to watch the team get to know the different guys and as coach May said just enjoy this step of where we are at and my sons accomplishment.
Every step is fun and we have great memories and want to make some more.

Thank you fanofgame, but son has not made it, he has a looooong way to go. Getting drafted or signing as a free agent, is making it to the first step, there are many levels to go, for most of the players. Becoming a professional was an accomplishment and we are proud of him, no matter where or when the road ends.... but milb is NOT MLB.

Part of his decision to go to college was for exposure and he did get alot of that on TV. I do beleive that was an important part of his plan to get him to the first step of his professional occupation.

"Made it"

You know some kids "Made it" if they make the JV roster. Some kids have "Made it" if they make the college roster and never start a game.

To me you "Made it" if you reach the highest level you were capable of reaching. To me being great does not mean you were a Hall of Famer. It does not mean you were all this or all that. To me being great or "Made it" means thay you achieved everything you were capable of.

To me a kid that makes his HS team and achieves everything he possibly could is great. And he is greater than a major league player that was capable of being a HOF guy but did not achieve all he could have.

No one is ever a failure if they achieve all they were capable of. How in the world could we ever say a kid was a failure if they were all they could be? And to me just because a guy makes it to the Majors does not mean he made it. If he is everything he could have been he has "Made it".

What the typical person may feel is the dream may not be the dream to someone else. Imagine the view of the kid who would give anything to be a professional athlete when others walk away to pursue their real dream. Mike Reid (Bengals) left football at age 27 to become a full time concert pianist. Robert Smith (Vikings) and Brent Jones (49ers) left the game at 28 to go to med school. Each of these players were stars in their prime. Smith called football a hobby that paid well.

RJM, another one to mention would be Pat Tillman... if anybody does not know that story, a quick google search should give you plenty..

For anyone who doesn't know Tillman left the NFL to be an Army Ranger. He died in Afghanistan.

This is a great question and a great thread. Like so many here, my son wants to play baseball professionally someday. I think that is great goal.

But I have been around long enough, and have known enough professional athletes to know that the professional athlete lifestyle can leave a lot to be desired. It has its own costs in terms of family life and stability.

So I am fine with my son working toward his goal, his dream. And I love every single second of the time I spend watching him play sports.

But if he never plays baseball professionally, fine. The great thing about baseball is that it has already opened doors and directed him in a way that will have a huge impact on his life, his future success, in whatever field he ends up pursuing. The life lessons he has learned and will continue to learn from baseball will be a factor in his success no matter what he ends up doing.

quote:

Originally posted by justbaseball:
As usual, Fungo asks a really great question!

He's spending way too much time deep in thought out there in his boat on that lake!!!

I graduated with a guy whose brother was signed by the Cincy Reds out of a free agent tryout camp back in the early 90's. He went to rookie ball close to where we grew up in WV and he did great. At that point he was the 5th fastest guy in the entire Reds organization. He was shipped out to like Wyoming or somewhere for low A ball the next year. He quit and came home. He looked at us and said it was too much of a job and wasn't fun anymore.

At that time I thought he was a quitter and was giving up a dream chance. Now that I am older and wiser I can't say that anymore. It wasn't his dream to play. In fact looking back at it now I can see where he played because people expected him too. He wasn't playing for himself anymore and he gave it up.

There are quitters in life but not all of them are. Guys like Robert Smith who gave up the NFL have different paths and just because we think that is the way to go doesn't mean it's the way for them to go. If someone gives up playing professionally and enters medical school and becomes a doctor they haven't wasted their talent. They are using their talent.

As for the father who said he wished his son hadn't made it to pro ball (early in the thread) I don't know what to say about that. On one hand he is being realistic and realizes it's a cut throat business. It's tough. But if my (or my son if I ever have one) dream is to play pro ball then I would rather go through the tough times and the anxiety that comes with it. I would rather go through the heartache and say I was there than to not make it and always wonder if I could or what it's like.

My dream of playing pro ball is now in the fantasy category. I am a high school coach and my dream has changed and now I want to coach college baseball. I have no idea if I will ever acheieve that dream but right now I have the opportunity to make a difference as a high school teacher / coach. If I never coach a college game I want to retire knowing I gave it my everything at whatever level I end up at.

Awesome post Rob. My sons goal is to play MLB one day. But his first goal was to be where he is right now. Your son is going to a great University and will have an opportunity to get a degree from Duke! And at the same time play in the ACC. I hope your son does play in the ML's one day. I hope mine does too. But if they dont so what? They are already winners in my book and so are all the rest.

See you Sunday night. Call me this weekend.

quote:

Originally posted by RJM:
Brent Jones (49ers) left the game at 28 to go to med school.

You're probably thinking of a different 49er tight end: John Frank, who retired at 27 and went to med school.

Brent Jones played until his body wouldn't cooperate, served several years as an analyst for CBS Sports, and is a partner in Northgate Capital. He's doing a little high school coaching on the side.

I like Coach May's word choice of "goal" vs. dream.

To me there is a differnce, my dream is to live on a beach in the middle of nowhere, it ain't gonna happen but it's fun to dream about it. Sometimes dreams can cloud the path to your goal.

It's hard for young players to identify their professional goals, I am not sure I have identified mine yet. However, working towards a goal (short term and long term), helps to make your dream a reality. That's why it's important to make a plan. Using baseball since this is the HSBBW, when son told us he wanted to play professional baseball someday, we sat down together (early HS) to try to come up with a plan to achieve that goal, using his best interests in mind. That is one reason why son never particiapated in other HS sports, that was not PART of his plan to reach his goal, but concentrating on baseball worked better for him. Organize and prioritize, and this included which travel team to join, which showcase or tournament to participate in, and very important to do well in school. That plan also included going to a HS that had a special advanced academic program where for some, going to a hS for a better team may be part of your plan.
Sometimes dreams and goals get confused, and become clearer as one gets older.

TPM - and this whole time I thought DK didn't play other sports because he wasn't athletic enough!

quote:

when son told us he wanted to play professional baseball someday, we sat down together (early HS) to try to come up with a plan to achieve that goal, using his best interests in mind.

Great approach, TPM ... we never put that much thought into it, just kind of let the chips fall where they may. Son was fortunate even tho we were relatively relaxed about everything until it came time to negotiate scholarship money.

I have to chuckle when I think back on the days when he was a very young player ... we are driving down a Montana highway on our first big camping trip ... trailer behind us ... country western music on the radio. 10 year old son is sitting in the back seat of the family Suburban playing Nintendo when all of a sudden he ponders aloud: "I just don't know what I want to be when I grow up ... a professional baseball player, a professional s*ccer player (he was not very good at that game with the anchor he wore when he ran), or (this is the funny part) .... A COUNTRY WESTERN SINGER."

He picked the right goal !!!

FBM,
I know that all of our sons express that desire. I don't think that we would have really thought much about it, but he was throwing hard, great mechanics, accurate and 3-4 pitches for strikes early. And he had that pitcher's body, a good sign. He often rejected the idea of pitcher only, because he loved the game so much and wanted to play everyone of them. It wasn't always an easy road being told you were just going to pitch. Even right now, sons dream is that of coming to the plate to hit. There were times he was frustrated, but as they mature and by junior/senior year of HS, most "pitcher" only guys have to face reality. But undertand, doing well in school was a large part of it, and I do feel that it opened more doors than just being a "pitcher" only. Sometimes if he got lazy in baseball, we never bugged him, but the question asked every night was "did you do your homework"?

IMO, most of our players will never see the ML field, and maybe if they do it will be for a short period of time. The average time of a MLB player is 4 years, with pitchers being less. That doesn't even count the time put in before you get there. Therefore, IMO, it's important to have other dreams and goals, and the game of baseball just part of the ride to prepare you for your future after baseball.