This is my first post, so please take it easy on me. 
My situation has nothing to do with my son at the present time, but rather with a pattern of behavior. Ninety percent of my son's team have come up together as young as 4th grade through a legion program and now are playing their first season of high school ball. Last year we got a newbie coach from the Midwest Nationals. The highest level he had coached was 6th grade. Now he was coaching a summer program from 8th-9th grade. He wasn't ready for it. He subscribed to the yell it down their throats way of coaching, with what bordered on verbal abuse. There was one occasion where he wouldn't let the boys eat anything between games because he said they "didn't deserve it." That comment was the first and ONLY time I've ever spoken to the coach about a negative matter. I refuse to be "that parent." But my son is hypoglycemic. So I sent the coach a text the next day (because we never talk to the coach on game nights) and simply asked him if he had made that comment. He never responded. My kid was benched for the first game ever the next night. Of course, I can't say anything about it to any of the other coaching staff. His message was received by me loud and clear. I know how it works. But a 13 year boys' health? C'mon.
Some of his other tactics are to look at a kid and say, "well here comes another error." Often, when we were down he would refuse to coach. He'd tell them that if they weren't going to play, he wasn't going to coach, and would deliberately leave the third base box and go lean on the fence with his arms crossed. Or just yell out to the field, "UNREAL!" (That was his favorite word.) He'd stop calling signs, stop calling pitches, and even refuse to look at the boys when they'd come off the field. Head down, shoulders hunched.... body language says a lot. And the basic mistakes were incredible to watch. Since when do you throw behind a runner on a second-third double steal with one out?
Despite rookie coaching issues last year, we thought it was over, but lo and behold, he appears this year as the Frosh coach. All is well over the summer and off-season workouts as the Varsity and JV coaches are all there to help rookie coach and work with the boys to bring them into the coaching philosophy of our program. We start the season optimistic as parents and begin 4-0. Rookie coach is doing okay, for awhile... Now that the upper-level coaches are coaching their own teams, Frosh coach has degenerated back into old tactics. This time, he has added personal grudges to the mix. Still the same insults, the same verbal abuse and the same "give up" coaching technique, but now I think he's crossed the line once again.
Last night one of our pitchers was up to bat. We are deep in pitching - one of our program's strategies. We need them healthy. First pitch is a ball. Second pitch is a fast ball inside, about at the player's chin. Batter pulls his head back. I hear the coach yell, 'Kid, you gotta roll with that. Get ON BASE!' Back in the dugout he told the boy, that he needed to take one for the team because the entire team knew he was the slowest on the team and had to get on base any way he could and he pulled him from the remainder of game one and all of game two. Now, I'm all for the sometimes you gotta wear it philosophy. That's part of the game. But this was at a players face. When is it crossing the line in making it personal and jeopardizing a player's safety for a base?
Other parents have stirred the pot so to speak, with the administration. Emails, phone calls... you know the drill. I have not. My Freshman son is one of the above-average players on the team (at least this year) and also plays JV on occasion and is excited about a possible future with college ball, but one of these days, sooner or later, it could be him again put in a safety situation. My kid has a great attitude and a passion for the game. But how long do I stand by and watch this? My son isn't getting any better. He's actually getting worse. But if we pull him from the town's legion summer program and move him to a traveling team for the summer, he'll be penalized when he returns to school ball. There is no spark on this team anymore and the pattern for two years in a row tells me it's this one particular coach. The other three are wonderful men with good coaching abilities and an approachable personality, yet previous pleas to them have fallen on deaf ears.
What is a parent to do? Do we have any options at all? Move out of the district? Tell my son to suck it up and it will be over in three years? (This guy probably isn't going anywhere.)
