How to decide?

Welcome to the site! With all these things being so close, I'd probably ask my son to remove baseball from the picture and see if that has any effect on what his choice would be. You'll frequently see posted here to make sure the fit is right without baseball. Unfortunately, there are many things that can happen where this could be the case and you want to ensure that the place is still a fit if that is how it turns out. Best of luck and enjoy your son having what sounds like great options!

For my 2018, primary factors were:

• the HC, his attention to detail and his baseball philosophies
• how the HC saw him contributing
• proximity of the school to home (far enough to be away from home, but close enough for us to go to games when we want).

Something we have done with a number of decisions is the pros/cons list for each option.

Good luck!

As the parent of a college senior, I would say that the absolute main factor would be how he interacts and feels about the HC (or maybe PC if he's a pitcher).  If he's not thrilled with the coach now, he won't like him at all in a year or two.  

Players aren't necessarily an issue....as probably 30-40% of the guys he met on his visit will be gone when he gets there.  If the "program" is good, the players normally buy into it.   Facilities?   My son's home field is one of the most blah places you'll ever visit, but because we're "up north" he only plays 15-16 home games there....so it's not an issue.  Indoor facility is nice enough....and that's where most of the real work (winter) comes in anyway. 

I'd say the head coach that recruits him now won't be the same guy he plays for.  It will be the same human being with the same name, but he'll be a different guy.  He won't be nearly as friendly, and he won't make as much time or show the same kind of interest.  If all the schools are about the same, you might try going to their website and do some roster research.  Go back 4 or 5 years and look at the freshmen names.  Then check to see how many were still on the roster as sophomores, then juniors, etc.  There will be attrition, just try to identify where it's heavier than expected and that could be a clue about the program. 

My 2018 had multiple offers from some great HA schools. He ended up not going to the place that had the best baseball coach, but there is no doubt that you have to like the coach where you are going.  Stability was a big thing for him as far as the baseball program went. Having a winning program was nice, but one of the schools that he really liked had a long history of losing, and that school was probably his 2nd choice. 

  He ultimately made his decision where to go to school for non baseball reasons. All of the schools he was looking at were flat out outstanding academically, so it boiled down to location and "vibe". One school was drastically different than the others in that respect.

 So far, things have worked out really well for him, baseball wise.

Since your post indicates that all the schools are similar, and it is a hard decision to make, I would factor in proximity big time.  It is really hard when your boy plays a long way from home.

Welcome to the site and congratulations to him on getting strong interest from many good options... truly a fortunate position!

Many good points made by others.  Only your son (with parents as shepherds) will know what is best for him.  I would caution that he doesn't put too much weight on anything coach related.  You want him to be with a good leader that he can respect but there is so much movement among college coaches, it will certainly not be a given that the HC or, especially, AC's will still be there four years down the road.  (That said, if a D3 program is particularly successful and the HC has some longevity but isn't retirement age, this can be a strong indicator he will most likely be around)

I would also suggest you pushing on consideration for all things beyond baseball.  I understand that baseball is what may be most important to your son at this point, but it is up to us as parents to continue to preach the importance of the 40 year path vs the 4 year path.   There are so many things, baseball related and otherwise, that can be weighed with this decision, there is no way you come up with a tie if you/he drill down far enough.  Unless there is some real pressing deadline looming, I would suggest he take advantage that these schools all seem to hold him in a very high place and wait on the decision.  Stay in touch with the schools, coaches and players.  Do more, deeper analysis with regard to schools, environment/atmosphere, weather, distances, etc.  Wait to see what additional info comes about that will sway his decision.  Since he has interacted with players at each school, I would have him pay particular attention to and continue dialog with the better underclassmen.  At D3, those are likely candidates to still be there and a big part of his social interaction.  After the initial visit, players are the most likely to tell him like it really is.  He should ask them the tough questions.  "What do you NOT like about the program and the school?"

There are two other aspects to fit; social and cultural. By social I mean the campus not the players he met. Even more important is cultural. For example a large metro northern player might not be comfortable in a rural south religious environment and vice versa.

All things considered where will he get the best academic experience combined with an acceptable baseball experience? If baseball doesn’t work out would he want to stay at the college. It’s why social and cultural is so important.

My 2018 had a number of offers from a variety of schools. There were a number of good options. His decision, quite honestly, came from the gut. It felt right to him. 

It was one of the last schools we visited, and before it, he did the same as your son. Visited a lot of schools and liked certain things about each one. At one point he told me, I'd like to have the dorm from School A, the major from School B, the facilities from School C and the coach from School D. Obviously, that wasn't possible so we kept looking. We visited some schools three or four times in an effort to help him decide.

But when he finally made up his mind, none of those things mattered. He didn't discuss it, didn't ask our opinions. He knew it was the right place for him. To some degree, if your son hasn't felt that yet, maybe he should keep looking?

Great question OP!

We first (collectively as a family) winnowed down the schools to those fitting a specific profile. In our case it was schools where the overwhelming overwhelming number of students graduated in 4 years AND which provided the most diverse and numerous number of prospective employers AND which also offered enough differing majors if S decided his preliminary pick changed (it did). S was very much a part of this process - and ultimately bought in.

Then we (again collectively as a family) worked through any financial issues - in our case it was really an understanding that we'd pay for 4 years of undergrad, period (no grad school).

Then we turned it over to him. (Essentially, we created a subset of schools.) It became the first adult decision he made in life. We didnt care if he chose a school because he liked the school colors, motto, girls, coaches, food, whatever. He wound up choosing a school we M and D) didnt rank as number 1 - but it was his decision. 

(Wife and I also believed that there is more than one perfect fit - kids can make their own fit in lots of schools.)

Not once did he complain about the overall selection (he had plenty of gripes as he realized how much harder it was than HS - gripes which ended by soph year) (and he had three disastrous - truly disastrous - baseball years). How could he complain? He made the decision. Now five years post graduation and his first adult decision - in hindsight - was a wise one.

For both sons it was the balance between who appeared to want him the most. the cost of the school after financial aid. needed his position in a year or 2. location not as important but not entirely  of no importance.  

For both sons it was the balance between who appeared to want him the most. the cost of the school after financial aid. needed his position in a year or 2. location not as important but not entirely  of no importance.  

A couple of things. School is important, would never argue it isn't. That said I'd guess 50-60%+ of the people I know are working in a field other than what they majored in. A majority of those would assert they put a lot of thought into their major but things changed. So picking the right school over the right coach/program might end up being the best decision one will ever make. Could also be one's biggest regret. 

As to baseball, now having gone through this, I'd say that fit is #1. How the coach thinks the game should be played and how your game/skillset match that. 9AND7DAD made a great point about the HC/RC. My son's HC is who he was, his RC turned out to be Jekyll and Hyde. My son's school recruited him because he "kills" baseballs (HC's words), then spent last year playing small ball. Coach told the kid at the end of the year they have big plans for him but at this point I'm left scratching my head as to why they recruited him. I've seen the same thing in some of the kids my son came up playing baseball with. They were recruited by schools, never saw the field, and left. Facilities and all that matter, but the coaching staff will determine the experience. 

So, this is probably your son's biggest decision in his young life and a large family investment probably somewhere in the $100K-$250K range...please correct me if I'm wrong.   Based on those large numbers, I probably would not put a heavy weighting on baseball UNLESS he is going to be a professional baseball player.   I'd probably look at which school graduates the highest quality students that are professionally ready for something other than baseball.   Also, he may have loans to pay or grad school on the horizon...remind him that he never stops learning or paying for that education.

I've been through this 3 times (my last college bill will coming this December then I'm done).   We gave my oldest son (college baseball player) a lot of rope with determining where he wanted to go (he had it narrowed down to 3 outstanding schools...baseball was a very small part of the decision) and we provided the parental sounding board when he needed it.  His rationale was incredible for a young man ready to make the biggest decision and accept some financial responsibility for some large numbers.  Honestly, if I was going to do it again I would take the same approach.  College baseball coaches come and go...college programs come and go.  Focus on the things your son has control over...his education. Let him come to you with his reasons then have an open mind to his choice.

Just my two cents.....    

I still believe a lot of it is what they want to be or do after college.  My son wants to play or coach/be involved in baseball.  So the baseball side is huge.  We were looking for a college with either long-term proven experience as HC or a new coach who would reasonably be there when son arrived.  Plus his goal was to play at the top of the college world so he was SEC or top half of ACC (no disrespect but his words and most peoples).  He was given several great offers from P5 schools and some were full rides but then he got his dream to play in SEC for a new HC who had been recruiting him as RC for another SEC school.  I may be on here 2 years from now saying we made a mistake but he has been accepted, got email this week, and now we wait for NLI.  As has been said, it has to be the whole package but baseball has to be a large part of it because of the time you invest in it.

My middle son was successful but I think he wishes he had taken another route.  He was offered full ride by SEC school out of high school to play QB and LHP at SEC school.  Football would be main priority and that is why he turned it down.  He wanted to focus on baseball but I think through conversations he wishes now he had taken the offer.

Wow ! You must have some very athletic boys to have multiple of them getting full ride baseball scholarships at P5 schools!

Can I suggest something I do at work while trying to make a decision (I sometimes have to make multimillion dollar decisions that can affect the direction of my company). Put together a list of categories of decision making criteria. Things such as “school location”, “liking the head coach”, “possibility of playing time”, “campus life”, etc.  

once you the develope the categories rank them and assign a weight to them. For instance if liking the head coach is important then give it a weight of 5. If campus life is impotent also give it a 5. If distance from home is not important give it a 1. If cost is only a minor factor give it a 3. 

Now without trying to influence the grading go through and grade each school for each category on a 1 to 3 scale. 

Take the category weight and multiply it by the score for each school. Add up the weighted scores for each school and hopefully one or two of them will stand out from the rest. 

I agree with Joes87.  What is important to one might not be to another.  Most have said baseball isn't that important in the decision, but for my son, it was really big, followed by location.  Those things might be really low for others.  The decision and weight of each aspect has to be determined by your son and your family.  What works for someone else, may not be the best for you.

Thanks so much to everyone for all your suggestions.  We had already done what Joes87 suggested, made the categories and rated them for each school.  I did want to weight the categories and multiply; what we didn't know was how important each item should be for him, which is why I asked my question here.  For example, he was very influenced by differences between the players who hosted him at each school (video games vs. shooting baskets, whether or not they were in fraternities, etc.), but no-one here has mentioned that, and thinking about it, the choice of hosts was probably somewhat random, with 30+ players there must be a variety of student types.

My son now has a better sense of how to think about some of these things.  He is very fortunate to have great options, we keep emphasizing that.

joes87 posted:

Can I suggest something I do at work while trying to make a decision (I sometimes have to make multimillion dollar decisions that can affect the direction of my company). Put together a list of categories of decision making criteria. Things such as “school location”, “liking the head coach”, “possibility of playing time”, “campus life”, etc.  

 

once you the develope the categories rank them and assign a weight to them. For instance if liking the head coach is important then give it a weight of 5. If campus life is impotent also give it a 5. If distance from home is not important give it a 1. If cost is only a minor factor give it a 3. 

Now without trying to influence the grading go through and grade each school for each category on a 1 to 3 scale. 

Take the category weight and multiply it by the score for each school. Add up the weighted scores for each school and hopefully one or two of them will stand out from the rest. 

I must apologize for the choppy nature and grammar in this post.  I typed it up on my iPad while doing some other work.

Tell your son to make sure the school passes the Tommy John test!
Will he still be happy at that school if he gets hurt or baseball goes away?