Is it Okay

Yes wait for the word, but it is so tough not knowing. Good luck!

No. Work hard and show your desire on the field. Do not plead your case as that just makes you seem weak.

I don't see anything wrong with a player asking the coach how he plans to use him. Why is everyone so worried about talking to the coach??? your not trying to sway him just want a heads up

quote:

Originally posted by njbb:
I don't see anything wrong with a player asking the coach how he plans to use him. Why is everyone so worried about talking to the coach??? your not trying to sway him just want a heads up

Careful. I sense a bit of heresy in you!

Personally, I agree with you 100%, but I daresay most people don’t feel the same way. IMHO, this is a topic that brings out the paranoid side of most coaches, but I don’t think the paranoia is as warranted as most believe.

I never have seen anything wrong with asking a coach to explain his philosophies. After all, that’s nothing more than reciting things they’ve come to believe. Nit picking every decision is something else again.

If a coach can’t be very clear about his philosophies, and can’t reasonably explain why he has them, he shouldn’t be coaching. After all, isn’t what he’s trying to do is get his players and hopefully their parents to buy into his philosophies? If he can’t state them or explain them, why should anyone buy into them?

quote:

Originally posted by njbb:
I don't see anything wrong with a player asking the coach how he plans to use him. Why is everyone so worried about talking to the coach??? your not trying to sway him just want a heads up

I think it depends on the coach - if he is approachable I would think he would appreciate a one on one with a player. Simply ask if there is a good time to have a short discussion. Dont chalenge him just ask how he sees your role and do what he tells you to do. Just to be clear, this is player to coach with no parental involvement and nothing ever is said outside of that private discussion. I just read TPMs response and she is right - make sure the timing is right - he just might not know yet.

Maybe the coach doesn't know where he is going to use the player.

What happens if a coach tells a player he is going to use him at second base, and he ends up in the OF? Or plans to use him as a starter and then he sits?

I am not a coach, but I am assuming on any level it takes a few games before things fall into place.
Although I tend to agree with njbb, I would wait until the coach formulates his season plans.

As I have siad before, just relax and enjoy.
JMO.

Learn to be patient !!!!

Talk with the coach and see how he is going to use you as quickly as you can...

So...If you are not going to play very much, you have the option of doing something else instead of wasting your time carrying equipment and tossing soft-toss with the regulars.

Find out now...not later.

quote:

Originally posted by BeenthereIL:
Talk with the coach and see how he is going to use you as quickly as you can...

So...If you are not going to play very much, you have the option of doing something else instead of wasting your time carrying equipment and tossing soft-toss with the regulars.

Find out now...not later.

That's very encouraging........

Yeah, I didnt get that post

I've sort of run into a situation like that. I had my first game this past week, and I did overall pretty well, with a couple of mistakes and I wanted to know if I'd be starting the 2nd game also, or being replaced. It was just my paranoia, but I still don't know, because we got cancelled, but I wasnt going to ask the coach, I did speak to the captain, though...I think I'll start!

reality...

The sooner you realize it the better you are.

quote:

Originally posted by Scorekeeper:

If a coach can’t be very clear about his philosophies, and can’t reasonably explain why he has them, he shouldn’t be coaching. After all, isn’t what he’s trying to do is get his players and hopefully their parents to buy into his philosophies? If he can’t state them or explain them, why should anyone buy into them?

So - the player (and maybe even his/her parents) will determine what constitutes a "reasonable explanation" - And if they believe the coach hasnt explained himself reasonably - he shouldnt be coaching. LOL

Here is the deal - if you or your parents dont believe the coaches explanation is reasonable - or if you or your parents dont buy into his "philosophy" - remember - you do have a choice.

You can leave the team and try badminton.


Here is a hint:

Forget about what you - or your parents - think about the coaches verbal abilities.

You play the game with deeds - not words.

Hit the ball hard wherever you are in the lineup (or just in the scrimmages) - catch the thing - wherever the coach puts you in the field - and run like a wild dog everywhere - everytime.

Then - get a drink of water or gatorade - and do it again.

quote:

Originally posted by BeenthereIL:
reality...

The sooner you realize it the better you are.

What is reality for a player in HS?

I agree with njbb on this. I say it's OK to ask. Why do some consider the coach/player discussions taboo? I agree the player need to respect the coaching position but asking about his own development is not getting into the coach's sandbox. Most coaches initiate these discussions with their players and some coaches publicly post depth charts. They use these as motivational tools for their players. Since 3 innings is not much of a resume for a roster spot, I would like to know what the coach wants (needs) me to do to earn a spot. Besides, what's the harm in asking about which direction the coach sees your future headed? Hey, this might even show a little desire and maturity in your son that his coach wasn’t aware of.
Fungo

bb1,

I agree with Fungo,nj and others as well.

Your son - and every player - should have a discussion with the coach. Any coach worth his salt will speak to each player and let them know what he expects of them during the season.

However - that is a far cry - IMO - from evaluating the "reasonableness" of the coaches plans.

Two very different topics - and IMO - a distinction that you should pay careful attention to.

I'm in disbelief of some of the responses. Quit and do something else. Play badminton! They brought it up to him first that they would be discussing whether to play him at sophomore or not. He's a freshman. He would have been fine if they hadn't said anything. Also telling him to keep the jerseys means something. I think if a coach says something he needs to follow up with the kid, at least something about how they see it. Once again the coach brought it up not the kid. They've already told him they see him going far in the program and blah,blah, blah. To say one thing and then not follow-up on it is wrong. The kid just wants to know where they see him for this season not for 4 years, he's going to start that's not the issue, it is just at what level. Why is it that coaches every time they are asked a question regard it as disrespect. Shouldn't they want a kid who wants to be the best.

bb1,

Read my responses again - please.

My first response was directly - with quotes - related to the advice given to you by Scorekeeper to evaluate the "reasonableness" of the coaches explanations.

That is really bad advice IMO.

My second response was directly related to your original question. There is nothing wrong with your son - IMO - asking the coach what is expected of him. I think that is a much better way of going about the process - and I think it is totally appropriate for your son to do so.

And whatever the coach says - every time he gets a chance - at anything - tell him to go at it like a hungry dog on a piece of meat.

Geeze!

He did tell him to keep the 2 jerseys, which probably means he's planning on using him on both squads (this is good news, smile).
He told him they see him going far. (good news again)

Now, is the coach supposed to tell every kid on his roster (I have 34 right now) exactly what plans he has for them? Because for every one that is going up that means there is one going down... And since it is early in the year it is only fair to hand out the jerseys and let the kids start doing the talking with their bats and their gloves. Personally, as a player I couldn't stand coaches who always had to "talk"... How did they know what was going to happen? If Billy gets hurt things change, if Frank shows he can't hit a curveball, things change.

Basically your kid is doing great. Go out to the games, get a good seat, bring your camera and a bag of seeds and have a great time...

Trojan-skipper. That is the advice I was looking for it makes a lot of sense. I agree I had a few coaches that were always talking and actually they were my least favorite. Just let me field, hit, run, pitch and everything else will work itself out.

Keep us posted... And tell him not to get his dobber down if he gets sent over to the freshman field one day because he might be right back to the sophs the next... You never know what all is going on. Sometimes kids are on the downlist or sick or their arms are tender and it causes all kinds of roster moves... Enjoy your season.

IITG,

If you re-read what I said, you’ll notice I didn’t say a word about what was reasonable or who was the determiner. I did that on purpose because I’ve been through this one, and it gets real ugly real quickly. Perhaps I should have explained in more depth what I was thinking, but I’ve been told to try to shorten up my posts. However, since you ask, I will go into more detail.

First of all, I was thinking of HS teams. What I was thinking is that every coach I’ve ever heard of has some kind of meeting prior to the season getting going. Now you have all the coaches, players, parents, and probably the AD sitting in a room. Usually there’s a handout of some type, and in it there’s some kind of overall philosophy written down.

At that meeting everyone is usually told to ask any questions they have so that sort of thing doesn’t have to become a distraction during the season. What’s in that booklet or whatever, has to have been seen, edited and approved by the people the coach works for and is answerable to, the AD and the Principal.

Common sense tells me those people aren’t so stupid as to not read what the coach is gonna say, if for no other reason than there are generally guidelines that everyone has stay within. So now at least we hope there’s some kind of an explanation there, but if some dense daddy like myself doesn’t get something, he needs to ask!

If he doesn’t, that’s his problem, or if he still doesn’t understand, its still his problem and he needs to ask again. But at least he deserves an answer! I don’t give a rat’s patoo that the option is to go find another sport if you don’t like what’s going on with baseball! That’s a stupid option to have to take just because there’s not good communication!

If everything is done out in the open, there shouldn’t be any problem with whether or not the coach has explained things well enough. At least there wouldn’t be with me. But if there is a question and the person asking it doesn’t understand and says so, if the coach wants to take the “Go play badminton” card, to me he’s a jerk.

You seem to be trying to make it all about protecting the coach who may not have good communication skills. But is it so hard to believe that if an adult can’t communicate with other adults, he’s very likely not gonna be able to communicate well with a bunch of yahoos who’s testosterone and hormones are flowing like Niagara Falls?

People are all different, or are you gonna say every single ML player played or plays the game like Pete Rose speed? Parents are entitled to know who they’re turning their kids over to, and what they can expect, at least in a general way. And I’ll say it again, that if a coach can’t communicate what the big picture he sees is so it can be understood by the people playing for him and responsible for their well being, he’s the one who needs to go find the badminton courts.

Not everyone is an unreasonable jerk PITA parent just because they want to know what’s going on.

We are making this way to complicated. Simply say coach can I have a word with you. Then ask one simple question. "Coach, as of right now, how/what do you want me to do to help the team".

If this is the second day of practice it is to soon. If the second week maybe not.

Whatever the response, say yes sir and do what he tells you.

quote:

Originally posted by itsinthegame:
bb1,

Read my responses again - please.

My first response was directly - with quotes - related to the advice given to you by Scorekeeper to evaluate the "reasonableness" of the coaches explanations.

That is really bad advice IMO.

What in the world are you talking about? I didn’t give advice to anyone! I responded to njbb’s post, and was agreeing with him! All I was doing was stating my opinion, not telling anyone to do a darn thing.

Scorekeeper,

Now you say - if "everything is done out in the open its OK"?

Before you said - you wanted an explanation that was reasonable - as determined by player and parents.

Which is it?

Openness - or verbal acuity?

I think you write alot of words - but dont say very much.
I think you hijack threads and turn them into garbage.
I think your attempts at subtle sarcasm are sophmoric - at best.

Here's the bottom line - I dont like how you talk down - albeit in cyber land - to this community - and how you put down coaches and parents - and the game.

That is my opinion - and it is most certainly one you will have to struggle against mightily to stifle.

Lets keep on track folks

quote:

Originally posted by catcher09:
We are making this way to complicated. Simply say coach can I have a word with you. Then ask one simple question. "Coach, as of right now, how/what do you want me to do to help the team".

If this is the second day of practice it is to soon. If the second week maybe not.

Whatever the response, say yes sir and do what he tells you.

quote:

Originally posted by Scorekeeper:

You seem to be trying to make it all about protecting the coach who may not have good communication skills. But is it so hard to believe that if an adult can’t communicate with other adults, he’s very likely not gonna be able to communicate well with a bunch of yahoos who’s testosterone and hormones are flowing like Niagara Falls?

Scorekeeper,

BS

Now you are labeling young players as "Yahoos"?

And talking about who the parents are "turning their kids over to"?

The question was should a young player talk to his coach about what to expect during the season.

You turned it into garbage - as usual. IMO

You all still chuckling?

quote:

Originally posted by catcher09:
Lets keep on track folks

quote:

Originally posted by catcher09:
We are making this way to complicated. Simply say coach can I have a word with you. Then ask one simple question. "Coach, as of right now, how/what do you want me to do to help the team".

If this is the second day of practice it is to soon. If the second week maybe not.

Whatever the response, say yes sir and do what he tells you.

Right it really is being made all too complicated. When I have seen these types of questions before it turns into things such as the parents shouldn't say anything. The kids should jump off a bridge for the coach without question. There are many good coaches out there who truly care about and want the best for their players. However, there are others that don't seem to know their ________ from a hole in the wall. There are some who got stuck with the job and are really football guys in baseball get-up. The jury is still out on what kind of coaches my son has but I'm leaning towards the second one. Really though it is a simple question that becomes all to complicated, can a kid ask where he stands? The answer is yes with guidelines. Such as put it in a way as to not be questioning the coach. Do it at the appropriate time. In other words not during or after a game. Do not be on the defensive take what the coach is telling you to heart. Then go out and work hard whether the news was good or bad.

bb1 ...

Just some motherly thoughts:

"Really though it is a simple question that becomes all to complicated"
It is only complicated in the minds of some people

"...can a kid ask where he stands?"
I truly admire any player who has the ability to speak with his coach and not feel intimidated, and if he can do that, I think he should

"The answer is yes with guidelines. Such as put it in a way as to not be questioning the coach."
Key point here ... do not speak to the coach as tho challenging his authority, but show respect with well thought out questions.

"Do it at the appropriate time. In other words not during or after a game."
Good idea to make an 'appointment' and talk with the coach when he is least likely to be stressed.

"Do not be on the defensive .. take what the coach is telling you to heart."
Listen intently, make eye contact, have nothing in the hands to distract, breath deeply if the response isn't what you had hoped for, and try to let the coach know that you understand what he is telling you.

"Then go out and work hard whether the news was good or bad."
I think this is especially true if the response isn't postive, showing the coach that you aren't a pouter or a quitter. I am pretty sure he will take notice.

bb1 ... good luck to your son this season. Sounds like he has the coach's attention in a positive way. Hope everything works out for him and that he has a productive and healthy season.

quote:

I responded to njbb’s post, and was agreeing with him!

Kids need to learn how to talk to people of authority in a respectful, yet not timid manner. It's called adult conversation. It isn't always good news, and it isn't always pleasant, but it can and should be straightforward and earnest. Nothing wrong with talking with a coach, I always encouraged it of my players.

There is no reason at all for the parent to talk to the coach.
The parent has no business expecting the coach to talk to them.
It's as simple as that.
Stay out of the coaches business.
Its your son's game, Your sons team, Your son's responsibility to talk to the coach. Period.

Let them grow up to be the young man you would like them to be.
EH

Be patient - ultimately, the coach will make the decision (if he's a good coach) that's best for the program and beneficial to the player. Many times as a coach, you are looking for the right mix of players to help your team perform at their optimum level...and that isn't as easy as it sounds. I have had players "hanging in the balance" a bit over the years, but it was never done to hurt the kid or make things difficult...I just wanted to make sure that my decision was a good one for everyone involved.

Coach Knight


Once again we agree-- patience is key for a young player --if he has talent his time will come

Our coaches always had a meeting with the parent and player after the team was picked. They met with each player/parent during a practice and laid out where they saw the [layer fitting in and his overall role on the team.
What I noticed was the reality was often different than the discussion would indicate. No coach can forsee were a player will fit in. There are a few that are obvious better than others but the landscape changes as the season progresses.

Bobblehead


That is why we don't have meetings

quote:

Originally posted by itsinthegame:
Now you say - if "everything is done out in the open its OK"?

Before you said - you wanted an explanation that was reasonable - as determined by player and parents.
Please go back through my posts and point out where I said as determined by player and parents

Here's the bottom line - I dont like how you talk down - albeit in cyber land - to this community - and how you put down coaches and parents - and the game.
And I don’t like how you try to come off as the baseball God who sees all, knows all, and is all. To me, you come across as a very mean and bitter person.

That is my opinion - and it is most certainly one you will have to struggle against mightily to stifle.
And now you have my opinion, and that’s what make the world turn.