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I'll likley take flack for this....got one in DI, one in JC...this I now know...
You research and you run down every source of information...and then you lie awake at night til late hours wondering if you really have done all you can...
...and you take them to school...and try to set it all up...and the transition is very tough on you (tougher likley than on them)...and you cry a little bit thinking about how you might just have completely ruined the rest of their lives...
...and they start...and they struggle some and you kick yourself for not doing more and not seeing things that "bite" them...and you do your best to solve them from far away...and you realize that the placement isn't what you though it was and it is hopeless for YOU to solve it...and that they are going to have to cowboy up, and grow...and fight and struggle for themselves...or move on...
And you are exactly, and finally right...for most us/them...it will be an entirely different experience than you/they expect...Nothing is set in stone at most schools...the kids who arrive in the fall are no always the kids you expected...sometimes they are at your your position...competition comes and goes...Some players are MUCH better than you thought...others never find themselves...coaches make good decisions and bad ones...players rise and fall...some players really "cowboy up"...others lose their passion...players click with some coaches dispise others...players get hurt...coaches move players into new positions...and sometimes back...and demote those that had waited for spots...Coaches come and go....The social/academic/atheletic trifecta is harder than you can imagine...academics really "Bite" some players...the social world will steal some...the only certainty is that the experience will be unlike anything you could have psyched out...
For in the end you have to trust your son, for in the end it is about a player and his own character...regardless of the coach, the situation...We have seen both and I can assure you that I have seen many more college kids give up and resign themsleves when faced with difficulty than are screwed by situations, or bad choices or bad luck...We have seen more kids simply do not take personal responsibility for fitness, for grades, for credits, for health, than are messed up by chooosing the wrong school...yet many timee the parents blame the school, and the coaches...
In the end ...character DOES matter...passion DOES matter...work ethic DOES matter...I can't tell you how many times spots open up due to injury, or poor performance and some kid steps in who simply would not go away...saw two players start this year who were told by coaches at the end of last year to go away...
and what you will also find in the end is that playing time or not, program development or not, real players find a way to better themselves...and in that process they become "lifetime winners" regardless of PT, AB's, struggle.....it just depends upon what he has in his heart. The winners learn by the experience, they learn about themselves and about their world, and they adapt, work harder or change situations and they are better for it...those who are not willing or able or prepared to pay a large price and see other greener pastures will find their glory in other venues...and that is fine...
Trust your sons. If you have instilled them with character and heart and passion....not just statistics (and I am sure you have) they will be fine....regardless.
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