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RJM posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:

Please! Do not turn this into a hitting thread.

It's just a conversation about "baseball." So get over it.  These things tend to evolve. 

Hitting exchanges take a different turn than most conversations. They often get ugly with people standing in their own corners based on the guru they worship. More often than not when a thread turns from wherever it was to hitting it gets ugly and goes down the tubes.

I don't disagree at all. Certainly not my intent to go hitting direction. The comment I replied to referenced hitting & my point was to show that likely there was a coaching philosophy in play when the other coach made the "funny comment," that can definitely be effective at times. Could relate to any part of the game. Thx.

With respect to original posters ? I honestly have no idea & certainly appreciate & am trying to soak up much of the advice given here with those who have experience dealing with a scenario like that.

Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:

Please! Do not turn this into a hitting thread.

It's just a conversation about "baseball." So get over it.  These things tend to evolve. 

Hitting exchanges take a different turn than most conversations. They often get ugly with people standing in their own corners based on the guru they worship. More often than not when a thread turns from wherever it was to hitting it gets ugly and goes down the tubes.

I don't disagree at all. Certainly not my intent to go hitting direction. The comment I replied to referenced hitting & my point was to show that likely there was a coaching philosophy in play when the other coach made the "funny comment," that can definitely be effective at times. Could relate to any part of the game. Thx.

With respect to original posters ? I honestly have no idea & certainly appreciate & am trying to soak up much of the advice given here with those who have experience dealing with a scenario like that.

Long distance running anyone?

2017LHPscrewball posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:

Please! Do not turn this into a hitting thread.

It's just a conversation about "baseball." So get over it.  These things tend to evolve. 

Hitting exchanges take a different turn than most conversations. They often get ugly with people standing in their own corners based on the guru they worship. More often than not when a thread turns from wherever it was to hitting it gets ugly and goes down the tubes.

I don't disagree at all. Certainly not my intent to go hitting direction. The comment I replied to referenced hitting & my point was to show that likely there was a coaching philosophy in play when the other coach made the "funny comment," that can definitely be effective at times. Could relate to any part of the game. Thx.

With respect to original posters ? I honestly have no idea & certainly appreciate & am trying to soak up much of the advice given here with those who have experience dealing with a scenario like that.

Long distance running anyone?

Can't we talk about ice again?

CaCO3Girl posted:
2017LHPscrewball posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:
Steve A. posted:
RJM posted:

Please! Do not turn this into a hitting thread.

It's just a conversation about "baseball." So get over it.  These things tend to evolve. 

Hitting exchanges take a different turn than most conversations. They often get ugly with people standing in their own corners based on the guru they worship. More often than not when a thread turns from wherever it was to hitting it gets ugly and goes down the tubes.

I don't disagree at all. Certainly not my intent to go hitting direction. The comment I replied to referenced hitting & my point was to show that likely there was a coaching philosophy in play when the other coach made the "funny comment," that can definitely be effective at times. Could relate to any part of the game. Thx.

With respect to original posters ? I honestly have no idea & certainly appreciate & am trying to soak up much of the advice given here with those who have experience dealing with a scenario like that.

Long distance running anyone?

Can't we talk about ice again?

"To ice or not to ice, that is the question." Shakespeare

Mchlwlsh posted:

well that didnt go well...we had that meeting. I was going to write this elaborate post like my initial post, but...nah

this article came out from this site we follow...talk about serendipitous!

http://travelballmoms.com/2016...s-passing-up-my-kid/ 

I'm not surprised. I bit my tongue through this entire thread...if you weren't going to listen, another voice probably wouldn't have convinced you.

Mchlwlsh posted:

well that didnt go well...we had that meeting. I was going to write this elaborate post like my initial post, but...nah

this article came out from this site we follow...talk about serendipitous!

http://travelballmoms.com/2016...s-passing-up-my-kid/ 

What about the meeting didn't go well?  Heck, what was the meeting even about, I'm still unclear on that.

As for that article...um....yeah....um.....while I do agree that if you take time to show up to a tryout a coach should look at you....I would also agree that if everyone is a foot taller than you and outweighs you by 50 pounds, and the coach is looking to form a Major team, then the coach probably won't look long.  That IS youth baseball, and it is why there are Major, AAA, AA, and A level teams.  If you don't fit the mold of one team the coach will pass on you, that's just life.

CaCO3Girl posted:
Mchlwlsh posted:

well that didnt go well...we had that meeting. I was going to write this elaborate post like my initial post, but...nah

this article came out from this site we follow...talk about serendipitous!

http://travelballmoms.com/2016...s-passing-up-my-kid/ 

What about the meeting didn't go well?  Heck, what was the meeting even about, I'm still unclear on that.

As for that article...um....yeah....um.....while I do agree that if you take time to show up to a tryout a coach should look at you....I would also agree that if everyone is a foot taller than you and outweighs you by 50 pounds, and the coach is looking to form a Major team, then the coach probably won't look long.  That IS youth baseball, and it is why there are Major, AAA, AA, and A level teams.  If you don't fit the mold of one team the coach will pass on you, that's just life.

I just read the travel moms article. It's a typical whiny, parent doesn't get it story. So what if your kid didn't make the team last year and got two hits off them this year. Maybe he wasn't good enough last year. The whiny parent didn't seem to mention whether his kid's team won or lost.

It's not hard to tell when a parent didn't go far in the game. Payback is nice. But it's not motivation. A "player" is motivated by the desire to succeed every game regardless of the competition. 

Do I understand what it is to have the smaller kid? My son was 5'2, 100 and 12u eligible in 13u and 5'4", 120 in 14u. It didn't stop him from hitting line drives. He didn't out practice everyone because he was smaller. He did it because he wanted to be the best player. Then he grew and out worked his own work ethic.

Last edited by RJM
RJM posted:
TPM posted:

This entire topic is whiney.

I would like to dedicate a song to this thread. I hadn't thought of this song, nor heard it in years until just now.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qjp_iG9vzEU

come on man you should know, although a little whining is acceptable.... there is absolutely no crying allowed in baseball.

Got to see Joe once in a bar setting , probably less than 30 people there, wow what a show.

 

bballman posted:

Looks like OP went back and deleted all his previous posts. Can someone fill those of us who missed it in on what happened?

What we were told: Kid makes varsity as a pitcher last year in 8th grade, this year, kid gets sent home from practice and parent gets email complaining about kids' attitude.

Parent decides that the coach is wrong (and implied abuse), and meets with him (despite many people here saying that was the wrong approach.) Meeting didn't go well.

My assessment: Parent doesn't listen well, which means that kid doesn't listen well. It was a whole bunch of "everyone else is wrong" (posters here, the coaching staff, etc.) and I'm willing to bet the coaches were absolutely right, if the kid is anything like the parent. I would note that the parent really didn't go into much substance about what was said about the player, and only those responses that gave the benefit of the doubt regarding the implied abuse accusation were treated with any credence.

If I'm misremembering, please correct me.

This is a perfect example of wasted bandwidth from people who have no clue on how this all works, which is usually a parent who thinks that their pre HS player is a stud and the coach is the bad guy.  

Parent didnt get the response they wanted so deleted everything after you all spend time giving advice, grrrrrr.

 

Last edited by TPM
Matt13 posted:
bballman posted:

Looks like OP went back and deleted all his previous posts. Can someone fill those of us who missed it in on what happened?

What we were told: Kid makes varsity as a pitcher last year in 8th grade, this year, kid gets sent home from practice and parent gets email complaining about kids' attitude.

Parent decides that the coach is wrong (and implied abuse), and meets with him (despite many people here saying that was the wrong approach.) Meeting didn't go well.

My assessment: Parent doesn't listen well, which means that kid doesn't listen well. It was a whole bunch of "everyone else is wrong" (posters here, the coaching staff, etc.) and I'm willing to bet the coaches were absolutely right, if the kid is anything like the parent. I would note that the parent really didn't go into much substance about what was said about the player, and only those responses that gave the benefit of the doubt regarding the implied abuse accusation were treated with any credence.

If I'm misremembering, please correct me.

I think it was JV as an 8th grader.

mmm1531 posted:
RJM posted:
TPM posted:

This entire topic is whiney.

I would like to dedicate a song to this thread. I hadn't thought of this song, nor heard it in years until just now.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qjp_iG9vzEU

come on man you should know, although a little whining is acceptable.... there is absolutely no crying allowed in baseball.

Got to see Joe once in a bar setting , probably less than 30 people there, wow what a show.

 

Actually whining isn't acceptable. It's deplorable. But I'll bet most posters have slipped up at least once. I was on a ledge when my son tore up his knee the first weekend of post junior year showcasing. 

The reality is whining doesn't accomplish anything. It's better just to state the circumstances to the best of your ability and ask what people think. 

I played college ball. By the time my son got to varsity (soph year) I had coached 18u showcase softball and 16u baseball. I've seen a lot. Far more often than it's the coach's fault the kid has concocted some story to place blame on the coach to deflect what really occurred.  Other times it's parents not understanding high school ball is big boy ball. They want to advocate for their son rather than teach him how to stand up for himself and be accountable.

Sometimes as parents we forget how we handled situations when we were our kid's age. When my son was a soph the varsity coach humiliated my son in a manner I felt was unprofessional. I was steamed. I was still steamed a week later. My son told me he was over it so, DAD, GET OVER IT! It was a valuable lesson. Never be more pissed off than your kid.

I also had a WWII veteran Marine dad who handled any situation this way, "You can be a pussy and quit. Or you can man up." The first time he to,d me I was ten in LL.

Last edited by RJM
Mchlwlsh posted:

holy crap...I got enough advice that it going to make my head explode. Thanks...

Mchlwlsh,

I get it if you got miffed at some of the insulting comments.  I get it if things didn't go well with the meeting.  But I would like to point out a few things.  

One, you have a young aspiring player - this site is a REALLY good resource that can help you both through the next 4-6 years.  I would encourage you to stay connected here.

Two, there are many who took time to try and help you on this thread.  When we do so, we are trying to help you, the OP, but also others who may find themselves in similar situations.  Among the jabs, there is a lot of useful information that came about due to your post.  By deleting everything, you make it very difficult for someone else to come in and navigate this thread and gain insight from it.  

Three, it makes it hard to learn what worked and didn't if you don't share whatever it is that didn't go well with the meeting.  Again, I get that it may be too personal to share and it is human nature to not want to share failed events but there must be something you can offer up here.

MANY of us have been rubbed the wrong way when we first came on to this site but there is far too much value to let the occasional direct shots, assumptions and negative tone posts bother you.

Hoping you can see the bigger picture and reconnect here...

PS - typing same time as RJM with basically the same message.

Last edited by cabbagedad
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