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My son is asking for advice on how to handle coach/situation.
This is his 3rd yr as a Varsity Pitcher he is a Junior has had a under 2.50 ERA since he is 14 years old. Which includes his summer elite travel teams. He has been seen often with PG and ranked in the top 500 and has very good said about him. Well this year he has another new coach for HS ball which has decided that his travel team of freshman and sophomores are deserving of being Varsity instead of the Juniors and Seniors.
Well the advice needed is My son had his first start yesterday against the team of friends/summer travel team. He pitched OK had 7 strikeouts in 3 innings but the balls that were hit went to outfield and the freshman do not know how to track balls. It was a 390 field with the wind blowing out. Coach had the kids playing about 300 feet. So you know what that means run 10 ft either side and 80 feet behind you. Just not a possibility. Six balls to same spot in 3 innings so son got 6 earned run since each kid got a triple out of their hits.
Also, my son hit a homerun in the 3rd inning.
Well now where the advice is needed. After game coach required kids to sit for 2 innings of next game (JV were playing) We asked coach if we could take son home so he could ice his arm (game was an hour from home) Coach said that was fair and said okay.
But then proceeded to insult us (parents) on how son needs to hit his spots better and that's why we lost the game. He threw 54 pitches and 11 balls total. With 7 strikeouts. Had a homerun. that's how the coach responds to the game. So we just turned around and walked away shaking our heads. The coach then ran after us (parents) and said we had to change our attitutde or he will have to punish our son. We are just starting our season and my son is already extremely frustrated not having fun. The coach has the kids at practise nightly and weekend for 5 hours a night. My son is quite frustrated but loves the game. He is really torn right now as to what he should do. Just tough it out and let the coach be a jerk or walk away and just get ready for summer ball? There really is no talent on the team. Perhaps the freshman sophomore might be good in a couple years but this coach does not seeem to be there for the right reason except to glorify his boys and tell them home much they (***X). I just don't think threats etc belong in HS ball. The coach should be respected I agree with that but should it not go both ways? After 6 games we are 2-4
Should my sons speak up we have taught him not to. That is respect. But what do you do when a coach is really not respectful to adults or kids. Personally since this guys is a teacher I wonder what he does in a class room. Rather scary.
Yes I know this post sounds whiny I just still very upset that I need to bow down to this coach because he says to. If I have an opionion I can verbalize it to my husband not to coach or other parents. And I will walk away when I don't like what I am hearing when someone is criticizing my family.
I know some/most of you will just tell me stay out of it. But in HS ball I need to trust the person in charge. My son is still my son no one has more authority over him than I do. So that's my question for advice. My son is not happy has no respect and has a future in D1 baseball. What should he do?
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You'll get better advice from other people. Here is my $.02

Tell your son to throw strikes & hit his spots. He can't play all 9 defensive positions. Compete and get prepared for this summer, the most important summer of the recruiting timeline.

As the parent you must monitor his health. (I'm not a pitcher's parent.) Count pitches, ice arm, make sure he's not overused or abused on the mound. All the things pitcher parents do.

I think your response so far has been appropriate. Don't draw attention to yourself. It is not about you - but you already know this.

Best of luck to your son.
BBMom34, I can tell you from experience (basketball) that not all HS coaches are there to help all players equally. Son's coach always has his favorite/favorites on team, runs his offense based on the individual star, rather than to encourage a team offense. Needless to say, our school rarely makes it to state and if they do, they go quickly. Coach is clueless.

The problem I see here is even though coach was negative about your son, turning and walking away only made him angrier. I think a straight on "lets set this record straight coach", reminding him of his duties to "encourage" his players, not critizing them in front of his parents works better for motivating a player. IMO he had no business threatening your son's status. The problem with HS is no one going to defend your son, only you. But from all the experience from the HSBBW folks the key here is your son has to work it out with the coach to the best of his ability. I hope your son can resolve this situation, do keep us informed of his progress. My best to you and your son.
#1 Mom/Dad, be a duck and let the comments roll off your back.

#2 Time for son to suck it up. If he has the tools he will play, criticism is part of the game and everyone has a different way of expressing themselves. He's the coach

#3 Baseball is not only things that happen between the lines but is made up of the events and personalities that occur when the game is not played. Situations like these develop "intestinal fortitude" and that is a life lesson that your son should experience without the input of Mom or Dad. Let things roll for now. I agree with teaching kids to "speak up" but sometimes you have to learn when to talk and when to roll with the punches.

#4 You don't leave a team early unless you're on the way to a doc.

JMHO
Last edited by rz1
quote:
Just tough it out and let the coach be a jerk or walk away and just get ready for summer ball?
The only thing he can do is tough it out and play his best. If your son is a college prospect you'll be surprised how quickly the word will spread regarding how much character he has dealing with a difficult situation. People notice when coaches are jerks.

If the threats continue it may be worth taking up with the AD, principal or board. However, if you escalate the situation your son will pay a price. The coach will have his own side to the story no matter have contrived it may be.

For whatever reason, maybe the coach sees upperclassmen as a threat to his authority. By promoting younger players he's molding them to follow him. It's a classic case of insecurity.

There are some facts I don't have to proceed but here goes anyway. Your son started as a freshman. Was he that good as a freshman, or is the school small, or have they had trouble winning over the past few years? If the program hasn't been successful the coach may he trying to run off what he perceives to be, "the losers/returning players." Even if this is the case I would use a successful upperclassman as a leader of younger, less mature players. I would pull him aside and explain the kind of leadership I'm looking for.

One last thing. Has your son in any shape or form, even subconsciously (rolling of eyes, not looking the coach in the eyes when he's talking, strutted his seniority, etc.) dissed the coach because he's new and doesn't care for him?
Last edited by RJM
I remembered my mother telling me this one when I was a kid . " The tall trees catch the wind." What she meant was the ones that have talent and shine over others will get the brunt from those that are looking for a scapegoat. It sounds as if the new coach is very insecure of his new postion so he has to take it out on someone.That someone is your son at least yesterday it was. He doesn't like being 2-4 and he is not about to say he is wrong with his decision making putting freshmen in the outfield behind your son. Your son can only do his job. I would say keep toughing it out knowing that as frustrating as it is, the coach is what he is, not very happy with his team overall and it is not your son's fault. For your son's sake, I would continue to look forward to summer ball, camps, showcases etc. I beleive they are more important anyway in the long run for playing at a higher level. Have your son consider high school ball as practice this year getting ready for summer ball.
We have had our difficulty with coaches over the years and I have tried many approaches of dealing with the c r a p that has been doled out to my younger sons in particular.

I have found that any actions that question the coach or cast them in any negative light have lasting negative repercussions for my sons, both on the field and among his team mates and peers in school.

Your situation is different than ours as your son is known and is already a junior. So he is ahead of the curve.

I still would do everything to keep my son in the game at HS (not playing raises questions that you do not want to discuss, you do not want the term "uncoachable" bantered about by an upset HS coach).

As parents this is especially hard and I find myself struggling with this right now.

It will do you no good to challenge or ignore the coach.

I would have had my son sit the 2 innings and support the JV team though in any case. Taking your kid from the field when everyone else was doing what was required by the coach put you in direct opposition and set your son apart from the team in a way that is not productive.

I have never been to a HS baseball field that did not have ice and a trainer to ensure proper care for a pitchers arm, I suppose they do exist.

I would have sat the 2 innings and then left to ice my sons arm if ice was not available at the field.

Otherwise dbg_fan has it right on, throw strikes and do your job.

Best of luck and I hope your situation improves.
Bring ice and saran wrap to the game for post game icing. I would never let my kid leave one minute earlier than the rest of the team. It just looks bad.

I dont think one minute of that caustic conversation with the coach would have happend had you not asked to leave early.

Being a part of the team is the most important lesson for your son to learn. Dont ask for special exceptions.
quote:
Originally posted by playfair:
Bring ice and saran wrap to the game for post game icing. I would never let my kid leave one minute earlier than the rest of the team. It just looks bad.

I dont think one minute of that caustic conversation with the coach would have happend had you not asked to leave early.

Being a part of the team is the most important lesson for your son to learn. Dont ask for special exceptions.


As rz1 (#4) and playfair have pointed out, this could've been why the coach took issue with you.

A move like this reeks of "prima-donna-ism".

Why do you need to ice after an outing of only 3 innings anyways???? Eek

Could've just let your son run some poles afterward instead and stay with the team until everyone was done.
Wow Thank you everyone for your advice. I actually feel alot better in advising my son in how to handle this individual. But the coach was not upset with son going home to ice his arm. ( The game was over) His comment to that was OH Yeah he needs to do that. (Personally he should have reminded him to run either that day or next also) He was more upset because 4 other kids had told him off after the game 4 seniors that did not get to play. So we took the brunt of it I think. Also yes I think he is a bit insecure. He has been passed up for 10 years to be a HS coach at this school. He was there last resort has to be a teacher.
Also to Floridafan. We do not have trainers at any games. Its up to the indiviual to take care of them self. To date last month 3 kids have had major injuries. Torn ACL, Broken wrist, Groin Strain. Not much goes into teaching or understanding health/stretching issues.
Just a little more history. My sons has received numerous (45 or more) letters from some top D1 colleges and this coach refuses to do the coach part. So we sent them in as to the advice given here as N/A.
But I do like the advice you have all given just treat this as practise don't worry about stats just keep throwing strikes and be ready for this summer.
Also keep track of son on his pitch count which we always do. He normally averages 10-12 an inning.
And let the coaches words go in one ear and out the other if it nonsense. We need to keep sons esteem okay and his health.
In his 5 inninigs of play he has gone 70 pitches and has thrown 58 strikes. Just keep going with the flow I guess.
If your son's arm being iced is that important, bring a cooler and ice and do it at the game. Stop asking for special treatment. It doesn't matter if it is reasonable or not. Why put the coach in that situation. It is a no win scenario. If the coach says no, you're angry and he is wrong. If he lets your son leave, then he is allowing special treatment, perceived or otherwise. Don't put him or your son in that situation. He made have had a resentment that he took out on you as a critique. When you didn't handle that well, he turned into an arse.

His response is both immature and irresponsible. With all due respect, what do you expect from a new coach trying to establish his authority.

I can assure you of one thing. You have no control over his reactions. As a result of his perceived instability, don't put your child, yourself, or the coach in those kind of situations.

We all have egos and want our children to be recognized for their efforts. Consequently, we are sensitive at perceived slights. Try to avoid things you cannot control. Such as his behavior.

Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill. He may not be recognized for "toughing it out". I can assure you that if you leave the team, college coaches will wonder if he has an attitude problem. It can hurt him to leave. Just a reality.

This advice is worth exactly what you paid for it. I hope that it turns out well. I have been through it and it is tough when a coach is poo head. Grin and bear it. Remember what we all tell our sons. Just smile and nod and say yes coach. I call it humility, not humiliation.

All that being said, threatening to punish your son for not liking YOUR attitude is wrong and immature. Period. I am sure you could go to admin and level your complaint and concerns over fairness. You will surely get some result. Will it be a positive one? You have no control over the outcome. The coach does though. I would think hard and long on this before doing it. I would also ask myself if it is all that bad, or is my ego getting in the way?

JMO
Asking a coach to leave a game early will never sit well with any coach regardless. Among many variables with a "developing" young coach, this looks like a tipping point.

Sound like, on this issue, you threatened his "turf"

Not siding with the coach on any other issue. If things get too bad then school officials may need to be made aware. However, after this is done the toothpaste will be out of the tube and things will never be the same, even if your issues are resolved.

Best of luck
Last edited by thirdsacker66
Dumb question: why do school officials need to be made aware?

The kid wanted to leave and go ice---very simple--do it why the coach speaks--ice don't make noise

You seem to want to do your thing---and you blame the coach ---you touched a nerve here


By the way it might help if the boythrew more balls just to keep hitters off balance--if they know he grooves strikes they sit on the pitch
Last edited by TRhit
This almost certainly will not be the last time your son has to figure out how to deal with a coach who he doesn't get along with. In my view, this is an important thing to learn.

How to be a great teammate, hustle every day, every play, work hard to get better, and keep a great attitude - even when you feel the coach is treating you unfairly.

Learning how to do this is far, far more important than any single HS baseball season.

It would appear that you have already perhaps reacted to this in a way your son is emulating with the coach. I would stop this immediately.

Turn it into an exercise in overcoming adversity, and it will do you son a heck of a lot of good in the future.
BBMom34,

First of all, congratulations… sounds like you have a very talented son. You also sound like a great parent who loves your son very much, just like most of us here. I hope you can understand that these stories like yours, while being very true to you, are really incomplete without hearing the story from the coaches standpoint. Unless the coach is somehow endangering your son I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it. I would move on to something more important regarding your son’s future.

I’ve told this story a few times before, but I’m not sure how many “read between the lines” and think about what it really means. Please read between the lines and think that this could someday be your son… FWIW

Opening day in Milwaukee, our son had made the Brewers roster out of spring training. He had previously had some major league time with the Yankees and Diamondbacks. This was his 11th year in a professional baseball career that included two surgeries, one TJ surgery. The Brewers were playing the Astros and the park was full being opening day. Not sure how many, but 45,000 or so.

My wife, another one of our sons and a few friends were all there. Our son was brought in to pitch with one out and here is how it went (best that I can recall). All parents of pitchers have experienced the first part of this, it's the second part that is unusual. Smile

Hitter 1 – Bloop single
Hitter 2 – Ground ball through opposite side of the infield for a single runners at 1st/3rd
Runner at 1st, steals 2B
Hitter 3 – Intentional walk to set up double play – Bases loaded
Hitter 4 - Squeeze play works, ball late to the plate, and bases still loaded, one run scores
Hitter 5 – Another infield hit, second run scores, bases still loaded

Manager comes out to take him out, and as our son is walking towards the dugout, the entire crowd (minus us Big Grin) were booing him at the top of their lunges. Now I have been around this stuff my entire adult life. I spent a lot of time trying to teach our kids how to deal with the many things that can sometimes get in the way of success. But as I sat there watching our son walk off the field and listening to the boo’s get louder and louder… I could only think of one thing… How in the hell do you ever prepare someone for something like this? You just never think about advising someone about how to deal with 45,000 people full of temporary hate directed at one person. First of all, how many actually experience anything like this? I had heard lots of booing in the past, but it sure was a lot different this time around.

Then it hit me… Sometimes there are things you have no control over, things you can’t prepare for, times that you can’t protect someone, or you have any control over. I stood there looking around and wondering what was going through our son’s mind. Thinking, it's just a bunch of crazy baseball fans and hoping that he was strong enough to deal with this. Somehow, I just knew he was as he looked up at the crowd rather than hanging his head as he entered the dugout!

BTW, the next relief pitcher came in and gave up a Grand Slam. Son’s totals on opening day… 0 IP, 5 ERs. Oddly enough, there wasn’t a ball hit well, but that had happened before and he WAS prepared for that.

Anyway, we are in the car after the game and they were interviewing our son Ben on the radio. They actually asked him what he thought about all the booing. His reply… "You can’t let that stuff bother you. I would have booed too, when I do well the same people will be cheering". I was very proud of the fact he actually was prepared for the adversities that come with baseball. Even those things you can’t possibly prepare for.

Some might not understand why this was such a big deal or anything out of the ordinary, but that is only because they haven’t really experienced it in a personal way. It’s one thing to get ridden by the opposing crowd, this was the home team crowd. This wasn’t a few crazy fans yelling negative comments, this was more like 45,000 crazy people wanting to stone your son to death (exageration). My wife had heard bad things said by fans before, but as I looked at her this time she was shaking, her mouth was wide open in awe of this scene. There was nothing normal about this moment! This was something unforgettable, yet a very important experience, maybe even one of those priceless things. It might be hard to understand, but once past the immediate impact I was actually glad that it happened.

BTW, in his next 7 appearances (all one inning) he allowed one base runner. That one baserunner was another strange experience, that was replayed a gizzilion times on ESPN… It was Barry Bonds (historical at the time) 661st HR, which passed Willie Mays on the all time list.

So how does all this relate to younger kids and the adversity that comes with baseball? I will let others figure that out in there own way. But IMO it does have something to do with the mistakes we all have made by being too protective about certain things that are really insignificant in the long run. I think young players have to learn to deal with and solve problems on their own. It’s actually a very important part of the process! If they play long enough, they WILL run into many different coaches. Might as well prepare them early for the inevitable. If they have what it takes and they aren’t being abused, they will overcome the obstacles.
Thank You all but We did not leave the game early. The varsity game was complete we sat for another 30 mins. So that the 4 seniors could have it out with coach. Then the JV team had 45 minutes to warm up and then we were to sit for another 2 innings to support JV teams. It was a rescheduled game change from Tuesday till sat at 3 then sat at 11. Not our home field it was an hour away. Numerous players left (6) total. We support the team but we do have somewhat of a life. Saturday is a busy day in working people's life. Have other children also. But you need to get your children where they need to be. (They are not allowed to drive themselves per coach.) Yes I guess we could be considered selfish but I enjoy weekends with my family. Since in the summer all we do is travel for his baseball. And my sons plays 3 Varsity sports.
The JV game went 4 innings lost by slaughter rule.
Not that I can top any of the advice given (especially PG's) I do have some questions about some things you said

quote:
Well this year he has another new coach for HS ball


How many coaches has your son played for in HS?
How successful has the school been during these other coaches tenure?

quote:
To date last month 3 kids have had major injuries. Torn ACL, Broken wrist, Groin Strain. Not much goes into teaching or understanding health/stretching issues.


Were all of these baseball injuries or other spring sports invovled?
If they were baseball injuries how did they happen?

quote:
He was more upset because 4 other kids had told him off after the game 4 seniors that did not get to play.


So the 4 seniors told him off because they didn't play?
How did he handle this - did he yell at them or sit there and take it?

quote:
My sons has received numerous (45 or more) letters from some top D1 colleges and this coach refuses to do the coach part. So we sent them in as to the advice given here as N/A.


What did these letters want from the coach?
What did he say or do when he was asked to fill these out?

quote:
Well now where the advice is needed. After game coach required kids to sit for 2 innings of next game (JV were playing) We asked coach if we could take son home so he could ice his arm (game was an hour from home) Coach said that was fair and said okay But then proceeded to insult us (parents) on how son needs to hit his spots better and that's why we lost the game.


So did he go from reasonable to a jerk all of a sudden or do you think you might have missed some sarcasm? Reason I ask is that from what you put it seems he went bipolar and changed his attitude very quickly.
Did you stay the required amount of time or did you ask to leave the JV game early?

quote:
The JV game went 4 innings lost by slaughter rule


If most of the younger players are playing varsity then who is playing JV?
How many are on the varsity and JV roster?

Does your son play another position? Reason I ask this is if he pitched 3 innings and came out he could ice his arm the rest of the varsity game. If you waited until you got home an hour away after waiting all that time then icing would be pointless at that point. Of course if he went to another position then he would have to wait.

Thanks
A torn ACL is not something that you can really blame a coach for... Guess what-- no stretching is going to prevent that!!

Regarding staying for the JV game, how hard is it? If coach says to stay, then stay. How difficult is it to follow a few simple policies? If your son needed to so desperately ice his arm, then I'm sure there was ice at that school or he should have brought his ice packs or whatever with him.
It's Over BBMom34, Over.
Unless the coach apologize to you the next day , your son will have a tough time to be in the team.
Coaches have pride to protect. If he is a hard nosed coach, he won't give up that pride.

If I were you,
1. Start a body conditioning right now for March.
2. Get a private pitching and hitting instructor for Apirl or May. Practice everyday.
3. Play in a elite summer team in the summer.
4. Attend 3-4 PG events during the Fall & Winter.
5. Start signing the NLI after November.
6. Skip the senior ball and start spring training in Feb & maybe more PG showcases around the country if no one pick him up.

jmho
BBMom34 said: I know some/most of you will just tell me stay out of it.
___________________________________________________________


Your son is just starting the journey that separates the men from the boys. At this point it is important for you to show your son that you trust his judgment.

He needs to handle himself under stressful circumstances. If you fail to assure him that he has the "stuff" necessary to handle this coach and his new circumstances you could be responsible for destroying his confidence such that even when he is on the mound in pitching situations he may feel unworthy to succeed.

Believe me he will get plenty of negative feedback from coaches, players and people in the stands at the ball park. What he needs from you is a firm belief that your trust him, that he is worthy of the responsibility he has been given and his future is his to determine based on his own commitment to excellence.

In every walk of life there are jerks. Your son's performance and his reaction to them is based upon his own goals for himself not based upon hurtful actions and words of their insensitive remarks.

None of us are guaranteed not to be offended. What separates the men from the boys is how we handle being offended.

Believe me when I say your son will weather this coach if he keeps his eye focused on the task and not the personality.

JMO
Last edited by BBkaze
I am with PG here. It is never over. If you value the HS baseball experience then I would have my son, face to face, have a conversation with the coach. Tell him the steps you are going to take to make sure you hit your spots etc.(whatever is important to the coach)

The thing about hs baseball is this. It is a club. The coach runs the club. You can if selected to play for the club choose to play or not. But, it is his club to do whatever he wants with it.
quote:
His reply… "You can’t let that stuff bother you. I would have booed too, when I do well the same people will be cheering". I was very proud of the fact he actually was prepared for the adversities that come with baseball.
Great story PG. One spring I was wandering around the Padres spring training facility. Against a backstop I encountered a coach named House. I turned and said, "Are you Tom House who played for the Red Sox?" He laughed. He said he was surprised I knew his last name. When I asked why he responded, "By the time the announcer said, "Now pitching, #28, Tom ..., the park was echoing with boos." House had been brought in as a savior for the Red Sox bullpen and didn't meet expectations.
I would be very proud if my own 13 year old son ever got to pitch on his HS varsity team.

But as the father of just a 13 year old pitcher, I am surprised that the parents of a varsity pitcher didn't bring their own ice to the game? Especially if the schools trainer is not on top of this stuff already????!!!!

We have for a long time brought one of those ice wraps that you freeze in a cooler in our car.
quote:
In every walk of life there are jerks.


Very true, and also: In every walk of life there are less-experienced (coaches / teachers / managers / bosses) who will make some mistakes on the way to becoming a more-experienced and hopefully better (coach, etc.).

It sounds like this coach didn't handle things perfectly, but as a new coach he may be having a tough time learning to juggle the priorities of putting a winning team on the field this season, developing players for next season, and trying to get some playing time for seniors.

I remember when my younger son was on his HS freshman baseball team. Our freshman team had a new coach who had coached track but not baseball and had not even played baseball beyond LL. The coach was also a pastor and teacher at our small private HS, and one of the nicest, gentlest, kindest men you could ever hope to meet.

A few games into the season, our freshman team was beating the opponent something like 30 to 2 in about the third inning. This coach was so excited for his team that he forgot all about being a coach. He was grinning and just about jumping up and down at all the runs being scored, and seemed to have no idea that he should manage the game to keep the margin from going higher. He also had two players sitting on the bench who had gotten little or no playing time in the season so far, and he seemed to have forgotten all about getting those two players into the blowout game while there was still an inning or two left before the mercy rule. One of the dads who knew the coach quite well went over to the bench and quietly, respectfully reminded him of those things - which he appreciated.

I tell this story just to point out that new coaches have a lot of responsibilities to juggle, and it may take them a while to get things all under control. Meanwhile, if they are criticized by players and parents at games, they may not always have the presence of mind to stay calm after the 3rd or 4th complaint of the day. I agree with what PGStaff said:

"Things should calm down in time. Coaches are people too and just like all of us they sometimes say or do things they wish they wouldn't have said or done. I wouldn't be surprised if something good happened yet this year."

Good luck to your son, and let us know how things go!

Julie
Last edited by MN-Mom
Just an update on what happened on Monday. Well my son and one other boy are the only junior or seniors left on the team. The coach decided to suspend the rest (7 of them) since they show him no respect. So he will play his freshman and sophomore's who play on his travel team. Sigh its going to be a long season. Yes my son will probably sit the bench but oh well.
quote:
Originally posted by BBMom34:
Just an update on what happened on Monday. Well my son and one other boy are the only junior or seniors left on the team. The coach decided to suspend the rest (7 of them) since they show him no respect. So he will play his freshman and sophomore's who play on his travel team. Sigh its going to be a long season. Yes my son will probably sit the bench but oh well.


That's tough - at least your son is respectful. (btw, is that an excuse for the coach - not that your son isn't normally respectful) you know what what I'm saying - Smile

Bet the AD gets an earful. Good luck with the season.
The one thing that I am very experienced in is crazy coaches in HS. I can tell you that the players develop thick skin very quickly. After about the first month, when the coach starts acting crazy, he is lucky if half the players are actually listening to him. They may be looking him in the eye and nodding their heads, but they aren't listening. By the end of the year none will be hearing a word he says. If the kids are underclassmen, they won't hear a word he says the following year. Get your son ahead of the curve. Teach him to nod his head, look the coach in the eye, and go out and do his job. It will be good training for when he grows up and gets that crazy boss.

Good luck.
quote:
After about the first month, when the coach starts acting crazy, he is lucky if half the players are actually listening to him. They may be looking him in the eye and nodding their heads, but they aren't listening. By the end of the year none will be hearing a word he says.
Even a good coach gets tuned out sometimes by the end of the season. The kids are thinking, "Been there, heard it before Coach." This is where leadership by experienced players is helpful.

A crazed coach is just cutting his throat. I coached with one last year. The players told me they had already tuned him out when I told them to hear the message and take the behavior as a sense of urgency instead of craziness.
quote:
Originally posted by Doughnutman:
Gonna have to disagree with you on that RJM. Good coaches keep their players motivated, challenged and continually learning and improving. Most kids don't tune them out. They have the ability to interact with all of the players and keep them interested in what they have to offer.
They listen most of the time. But there are times when they tune them out. When Pat Riley resigned from the Lakers one reason he gave was he had run out of ways to motivate his players where they would listen. He said he had come at them from so many angles and run out of angles. There was nothing they hadn't heard before. They were starting to tune him out from hearing it before too many times.

I've played for some very good coaches in high school and college. There were times I knew they were being tuned out. What are you going to say to a Legion player (high school age) at game sixty of the summer he hasn't heard before? Now let's make it game sixty of the third season playing for the coach. This is when motivated players and team leaders take over.

My son has played many seasons of rec and travel baseball and basketball for me. One time in the car on the way to a game he smiled and said, "Dad, do we get motivational speech #7 or #26 today?" I know he's not paying attention when I give the speech. He could probably give it word for word. He looks in my direction out of respect me as a coach.
Last edited by RJM
RJM,
Those are long term scenarios. Most HS coaches only get the kids for a year or two. They had better be able to motivate them for two short seasons. Even kids that play for four years have a different dynamic with the coach over the four year time span. They go from kids that have talent and know next to nothing to Coaches on the field as captains and leaders. Good coaches know how to handle them and keep them listening, motivated and learning throughout their entire career.
quote:
They go from kids that have talent and know next to nothing to Coaches on the field as captains and leaders.


How can you say that the 14U 'All-Universe' travel player knows 'next to nothing'??? Wink

Seriously, it doesn't have to be the same coach for the 'been there, heard this before' or even 'been there and heard it from better coaches than you' to set in....

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