Do you really want an answer?

I really disagree (j/k) 

 

It is something I've wondered about.  Sometimes I side against the OP and sometimes I sympathize with them.  It depends on the topic and/or perceived agenda.  Sometimes I disagree with opinions expressed in a topic but more often than not bite my tongue.  Some old timers feel the need to habitually point out flaws in people's opinions and then try and cover themselves from criticism by saying that's just my opinion 

I know this, there are certain topics that get my dander up.  You know, the kind that seem to be asking a question yet are really disguised as a way to express some wonderful attribute about their "gifted" children and by extension - their brilliant parenting.

Example: My freshmen son who has a 4.5 GPA was the starting shortstop on varsity and batted in the three-hole and was just named to the all-state team.  His teammates seem to resent him and frankly, the other parents seem to give us the cold shoulder in the stands.  Any thoughts on how to handle this problem?  A: Sure, be thankful and quit complaining...

Example 2: (while I'm at it) - My son has trouble getting motivated to play on his high school team.  No offense, but none of the players are his caliber, do not take the game seriously, and are constantly making errors while he is pitching.  Should he just give up on high school baseball and wait for his "elite" summer team to begin?

Example 3: Help!!! My son has full ride offers from Arizona State, Stanford, Florida State, North Carolina and Texas.  We are not sure how to narrow things down.  Please help.  A: Why are you positing here?

Example 4: My son has so many offers that we need some type of filing system to keep everything straight.  Any suggestions?

Etc. etc. 

Both posts reek of the truth...

lol...Had to chuckle at your examples, CD.

 

As an "oldster," what I have to guard against is reacting negatively to the new post that asks something that's been asked and answered a jillion times here over the last 10 years. After all, from a "newster's" perspective, it's a perfectly legitimate...and many times, important...inquiry.

 

While I think it's occasionally okay to nudge the OP in the direction of the "Search" button (particularly if it's a question about a specific college program), l think the better response is to (1) take a deep breath and (2) answer the question for the jillionth time.

 

People who are new to the high school game and the recruiting process need and deserve to always feel welcome here; just as we did a million years ago. Moreover, as they gain experience, their input is vitally important to the new ones who follow them.

 

However, just like we tired of parents on the sidelines who found "transparent surreptitious" ways of bringing the topic around to how great their sons are, I think it's perfectly appropriate to recognize the same inclination on here; addressing the more egregious examples when they come up.

 

(Query to Julie: How do I change my screen name to "Oldster Prepster" ...or maybe just "Oldster" for short?)  

I agree with everything everyone here has said.

Some of those newbie bragging posts are pretty obvious.  Others show their true agenda's the more and more they reply to their thread.  But Old Timers need to be careful to let the not-so-obvious ones get to that point before they jump to a conclusion and respond in a discouraging manner.

 

Coming here a few years ago, I may have came across as just here to say how great my son was but I was honestly looking for insight and answers.  We were trying to find out if it would be worth it to try to play at the D1 level.  We were basically told that he was aiming too high.  Today I am happy I didn't share the responses with him.

 

Old Timer's experiences are very important and help newbies avoid mistakes, and heartaches but please don't jump too early with your responses.  Never forget that baseball is a game of odds...if you encourage someone and they succeed against the odds, you have graced us all.

Nice post.  I agree.  I would never make a decision based off what the message board felt was the right answer.  You have to decide based off your circumstances and beliefs. 

 

justbb's post was crafty.  I think it allows members here to see parts of themselves (good and bad) without calling anyone out specifically.  

I love this topic!

 

I joined when 2013 was a freshman or sophomore, I believe. Have I gotten my nose out of joint a couple of times, sure. Did I ever engage in a p***ing contest about it? Absolutely not.

 

I'll tell you "oldsters" and the newbies alike the same thing we've heard and read thousands of times on this board. It's an invaluable resource. There are three things in particular for which I will never be able to completely express my gratitude:

 

Because of this board my son was connected to a terrific travel team in a region that doesn't have good quality high school ball. He got the exposure, honest assessment, and recommendations that he needed.

 

Because of this board I learned that a DIII opportunity (or DII, JUCO, or NAIA) is not necessarily "less than" a DI offer. Look at the big picture, look at the program, look at your kid.

 

Because of this board I learned that when I needed to cry because my sophomore got hurt three days before his first varsity game, I could do it here when I was having to be strong for him. I acknowledged that my "hardship" was nowhere near what many other parents here have endured, but I still owned it and others shared it with me - and supported me.

 

Okay, so it's four things:

 

Because of this board, I learned that lying awake at night because your player has gone 0-9 in the past three games is not insanity and providing for lifting and private lessons during the offseason really doesn't make me a stage parent. Researching baseball programs and taking him on college visits and camps before he could drive does not make me over the top. It makes me informed and him well prepared.

 

Thank you all. I have always wanted your answers, and in turn, I've tried to provide a few myself when I thought I could.

 

 

Nice thoughts 2013 Parent.

 

I know one of the 'older-than-me' old dudes pounced on me pretty good in my first months on here...way back in the olden days.   In fact, I've felt pounced on more than a few times! 

 

(Er...um...like the time I fit CD's profile of throwing out a question to get attention on an accomplishment for one of my boys...way back when.  Some of the other old dudes will know who I'm talking about when I say our dear, wonderful friend bbscout gave me a good dose of (needed) medicine!  ).

 

But I picked myself up and kept coming back cause the reward seemed so much greater than the price! 

 

I'd be willing to bet that every single 'old dude' like me...has a story like mine and yours about their early days on here....nose out of joint and all of that!  And about how they gleaned such amazing information...by coming back. 

My son walks on water. I'm worried he might get his feet wet. What do I do?

You guys are too funny.

 

JMO 

Ok, so as probably the newest responder, I'll tell you what it looks like from here.  I have been the victim of snappy responses from "old timers" and even though it wasn't sugar coated, I appreciated the responses.  I promise that most of us that truly want input/advice are smart enough to recognize it in any form.  I also know when not to take the bait and get into a shooting match.  As for how fabulous my child is, I will sit back and let his career speak for itself.  It might end in HS or after a long MLB stint, but as you have all pointed out, it will end.  I have often seen those parents that feel the need to show off their kids in a subtle (or not so subtle) way fall silent when their child proves to be less than expected.

I'm here because I appreciate insight and because I know that it would be nearly impossible to gain knowledge & wisdom fast enough to actually get through this process without the you all.

So with a 2016 and a 2018, I'll be around awhile and I am grateful for everything you all have to share.

Hey, wait... I've used JMO/IMO from time to time... am I being picked on here?

I have received great advice, and been involved in a few disagreements with some posters.  This forum has been worth every minute spent reading and responding.  I advise others to get online and read it, and most do not do so thinking it is not worth their time--then they wonder what to do next to help their son  As a result of advice here my son was put in a position to start to get good college offers.  Thank you all. 

I don't remember being bar-b-qued by the old guard, but there was one time when I thought I was going to be for an answer I gave to a new poster. Instead I was supported. It just goes to show that this place is pretty diverse and surprising. 

 

I will say that I think sometimes there are irritating posts that just beg for a smack down. (Like the perfect kids who just can't get noticed.) Usually y'all show a lot of restraint, but sometimes..... 

 

People come here to share or validate ideas both good and bad.  It comes with the territory.  It is only through a place like HSBBWeb that people can try to understand some aspects of the sport that they've never had direct involvement in, or help folks where they have experience.  There is always something to learn from newbies and oldsters, and typically many perspectives which I find fascinating.   Some folks are helpful, cranky, sarcastic, condescending, whatever...but that is what makes it great! I love it.

 

There is just something enjoyable about talking about a game we all love, or watching a game with someone who appreciates the game as much as you do.  I got together with another HSBBWeb poster the other night to watch his son pitch in a College Summer League All-Star game.  I hung on every one of his pitches like it was my son pitching.  His son did great, and I know the poster was very relieved and proud at the same time.  I was very happy for both of them.

 

So, newbies and oldsters keep it coming whether it is a good question or not-so-good  question.  That is how we learn and share ideas. 

I am kind of like fenwaysouth.  I like to hang around here because of the social aspects.  I joined because I wanted to find out where my son stood in the pecking order after he committed to college.  His goal his whole life was to play in the big leagues and I was determined to do whatever it took to help him achieve that goal.  The hsbbweb supplied the answers I was looking for as I read just about every post by bbscout and PGStaff, for example, to try and learn what it took to not only succeed in college but catch the eye of at least one pro scout.  Along the way, I've acquired many great friends all over the country including several who have already posted in this thread.  

I think a good rule of thumb is not necessarily to write for the OP, but for whoever might be reading the thread.

 

Often the motivation to post is that the OP has already heard something they didn't want to hear, and they come here seeking validation more than enlightenment.  When they get the same info again, they aren't going to like it.  But those who are reading for the first time can still benefit even if some minds are already closed.

 

This is particularly so given that these boards are more the province of parents than of players.  What most parents need to hear is, BUTT OUT, stop the helicoptering and force your son to handle his affairs, so that he is prepared for adulthood when he graduates high school and goes off to live on his own somewhere.  What most WANT to hear is that in their particular situation, there are all sorts of extenuating circumstances that justify an exception so that it's OK to helicopter.

 

It reminds me of the old Dr. Laura show, though.  The entertainment aspect of the show was in listening to whiners call up and get chewed out.  Kind of like watching a lion jump on a wounded zebra.  And yet, every day more people would call in, thoroughly convinced that THEY were the ONE PERSON whose situation would garner sympathy from Dr. Laura.  Only to find out ... nope.

Midlo Dad,

 

That is beautiful and so true IMHO! 

 

Last night my wife and I were catching up on her recent college orientation trip with our middle son.  Truthfully, I think the orientation is more for the parents than the kids. 

 

One of the orientation speakers (Dr in Psychology) told all the parents that NOW was the time to LET GO, as their young adults will be making their own decisions about friends, classes, activities, etc in the coming weeks.  So the next morning, my son's best friend's mother calls him at 6:45am (in his dorm room) after they had been at an all-night orientation party the previous night to remind him he needs to be at a certain orientation activity at 7:30am.  The son asks the calling mother...."didn't you hear anything the orientation speaker told you?".  She replied...."I did but it doesn't start until this afternoon when I leave (campus) for home."

What's wrong with someone bragging, trying to confirm their own ideas or anything of the sort? Isn't that what this place is for????? Just because someone is able to sit on their laptop day after day, year after year doesn't make them an expert (old timers). I mean.....if their word was that gospel, then they would be getting paid by someone for it. They wouldn't be here wasting their time yapping all their wisdom for no fee. Just maybe they're HERE because no one in the real world appreciates their views, which in turn is another reason to be here along with bragging and such. Its all perspective.
I posted a question the other day and realized quickly that I couldn't convey my message without writing a novel. I also realized that many of the responses were not coming from "smalltime", USA.

 

I came onto this website as a 15 year old high school freshman. I had a big curveball, a bigger temper and an even bigger ego. One of my first posts involved me basically lashing out towards a regional event held by Perfect Game. I was distraught at the time due to the fact that the tournament was rained out and felt as though my team and I didn't get the appropriate exposure we deserved. I was rude, condescending and downright mean.

 

I was CRUCIFIED for it. I was called every name in the book- and deservedly so. Upon calming down and rereading what I had written, I came to the realization that it'd be pretty stupid of me to be on the negative side of anyone within the baseball world at all, especially as the result of a few blabbing paragraphs I made on an online message board. I apologized for my sentiments several times during that thread. Some of the "old guard" accepted it as a young kid being dumb, others may have taken it to heart and been bothered by the brashness. PGStaff chimed in on the thread as well and although he claims to not remember the interaction- I remember it vividly. The man who was at the helm of the organization I took time to publicly bash accepted my apology and told me I was mature for it. There was something different about this place.

 

I stuck around for a while, soaking up information and reading along with threads. I'd post here and there- mostly nonsensical banter and commonplace back and forths. I developed a few friendly relationships with some posters and a few not-so-friendly ones as well. As time went on, the HSBBWeb became more than just a community in which to express myself. It became a huge resource for me moving forward as I begin my trek into the world of college recruiting.

 

As the clock turned and my experience here went from high school player to college player, my perspective began changing as well. Often times I found myself reading much of the same material over and over again, resonating very well with the individuals who posted the question(s).

 

I gradually found myself switching sides- from information seeker to information giver. I'd become an "old timer"...I had been through the process that many were going through, and I could help. I continued on this path for a while in a manner that I thought was ideal. It was an opportunity to give back to the community that had helped me so much.

 

When I felt a pop in my elbow during my junior year of college, there were many shoulders to lean on here on the HSBBWeb. I shared my experience- from the operating table to my first bullpen back after surgery- here. And everyone was supportive.

 

Are some posts self-centered and seeking affirmation? Sure. We all do that, don't we? I hate being wrong. Can't stand it. Ask my girlfriend, she'll tell you the same thing. That doesn't make you a bad person.

 

I've been a culprit of a cranky response here and there during my time on these message boards. Sometimes an OP will tick me off a little bit and I may be a little blunt and upfront about things. I realize it before I write it, while I'm writing it, and after I write it. We're all human.

 

In the end, this website has provided me with more than I could've ever asked for. I'm no longer a high school athlete or a college athlete. I have no dog in the fight, no ulterior motive. I've realized that this truly is a wonderful and unique place and I love being a (very small) part of it. I read here every single day of my life and learn something just about every time I do so. And when the rare opportunity comes where I actually can provide some insight- I look forward to being able to help out someone who's position I was in, once upon a time.

 

Drew, I can't speak for other people, but that's why I'm here. I am very fortunate to actually get paid by an organization in the "real world" for sharing some of the knowledge I've accumulated over time. But without the HSBBWeb, that knowledge wouldn't be so vast. I thoroughly enjoy sitting here on my laptop and "yapping away" like some kind of "expert" every once in a while because a while back, other people did the same exact thing for me.

You deserve MUCH more credit here than that, my friend!

 

What a great, great post...and what a tremendous contribution you've made here over the years!

 

In no small part due to this website, I have a son who's living his dream, day-in-and-day-out, working in the game he loves. That's all the "payment" I could ever want.

 

Those of us who have walked the path have picked up some things along the way. It's never seemed like a waste of time to try to give back some small portion of what my son and I received when he was of the age to benefit from it.

My point was it's an open forum and who cares if someone is bragging.
Also, for the most part, I don't see Ray Tanner, Rick Savage or anyone that would say something that has the resume to back it up. A lot of knowledgeable folks, but just because you consider yourself an old timer does not give you any more authority on the subject than me. Maybe you are Ray Tanner.......IDK, but my name is Drew. It's all perspective.
Like I said before, you can't ask a question and get well thought feed back unless u write a novel explaining every detail.

Really, because I would LOVE a real paycheck from baseball besides the mediocre checks I've received coaching high school and Juco.

In my time in professional baseball, I've learned that the payment being received often goes far beyond the actual numbers on the paycheck.

Heck yeah. Great hotels, beautiful women, working with people that have seen everything, great seats etc.....
No brainer.

Not exactly what I was referring to...

This is entertaining!  

Exactly my point. If you do not write a novel, your thoughts can be perceived in many ways.
Its great u enjoy more than ur paycheck. Otherwise...... what a crappy life it would be. I think that's everyone's philosophy in life. Nobody wants a job they hate. Right?

My thoughts on the above comments by Drew..... 

 

Great post JH.

 

Prepster, just love that new avatar!

TPM.......what so great about it? Was it spiritually lifting for you?
Please detail out what was GREAT about his post?
Read down thru.......I thru myself out there and now all you see is the "mob mentality". Exactly what I expected. This great and is so common on forums with members that feel like they're entitled. See how easy it was to get off of the OP.

I was a long time reader before I ever posted for fear of the lashing, harsh comments, etc.  To avoid putting my son's "novel" on the board, I PM'd (private message; private dialog) an old-timer to get an answer to a question I had in the pre-high school forum.  Seeking out the advice from some of the old-timers can be so valuable! 

(Love the avatar, Prepster!)

 

This was a really good topic.

I do not feel like I am entitled, but I do get the impression that you do.

You may coach the game, but IMO you have no clue about what it is really all about.

 

In all fairness, most of us here know who each other are, you don't know us and we don't know you, so yes you have come to a place where there are strong bonds and ties.  This isn't your ordinary message board.

 

What we always taught son when he was very young, the game is so much bigger than one person can comprehend and he has learned that, and he gives back as much as he can, and so do I without every asking anything here in return as do all of us.

 

I take offense to the comments made about what you perceive as the reason why men play a boys game.  Those who abuse this job are exception.  Everyone my son is or has been involved with is deeply involved with everything that is good about the game, good hard working guys, family men, religious, caring. 

 

You have no clue.

I'm certainly getting the impression that Drew is all about...well...Drew.  

 

According to Drew, HS head coach (who got the job over him) is an idiot.  All the parents and AD love him and want him to coach to cover for the idiot.  He's the savior. But still, he didn't get the job and the "idiot" won't listen to him.  (Anyone wonder why at this point?  ).  

 

He gave up coaching his LL son to save everyone.  But then again...I think the real motivation was to coach his HS son to begin with.  We now learn that he would have to write a novel for any of us to understand.  He's underpaid despite his hours on the JC and HS diamonds.

 

Now its all about the 'old timers' ruining his party on this thread...which was not about Drew.  But still...why not make it about Drew...he begs?  

 

Drew needs attention...that is clear.  Its all about Drew...for Drew of course.

 

I've seen several hundred "Drews" before...so now...can we move on from Drew?  Please?!  

Drew - it's ironic you bring up Ray Tanner.  The guy is the epitome of class and humility and his teams play hard without any fluff.  He would never brag or try to puff things up like you seem to be advocating.  You seem to be the opposite of that - all hat and no cowboy is my impression.

 

You don't need to write a novel to communicate Drew.  You just need to learn how to write.  Amazing how simple the solution is sometimes.

 

Sticks and stoners boys. Did I question someones knowledge? No.
Ray Tanner is great. And ya.....I'm not in his class.
I donated my pay back to high school boosters. Soooo. Honestly.....there was no juco pay.
The coach for my sons team is an idiot. Talking about taking away from coaching my younger son....seriously.....ya went there? I said if I quit the high school team I would get the chance to coach him. I can be his savior.
Great coaches are at all levels but if ur at the proffesional level then UV seen a lot more than most. That's easy to respect.

All hat and no cowboy....great stuff!