I still dont buy in here. You missed a practice and you pitched well in playoffs but your defense let you down so you lost opportunities just sounds like a bunch of excuses.
I think its a great idea you are making a change, he probably is glad too.
JMO
TPM posted:I still dont buy in here. You missed a practice and you pitched well in playoffs but your defense let you down so you lost opportunities just sounds like a bunch of excuses.
I think its a great idea you are making a change, he probably is glad too.
JMO
Believe what you want. If I were making excuses I would be saying things like "he has it out for me!" "he doesn't want me to play in college so he is benching me!" "I never had a bad outing this whole season and he's taking me out because he hates me!" I am purely explaining my situation that you have absolutely no background on which is why I find it odd that you are making assumptions that he is "glad" about me going in a different direction. If he didn't want me around he would have kicked me out of his training facility which he has done to others in the past. But as I opened with, believe what you want 
Dont take offense, although the reasons given may be of significance, never gives excuses as to why you sat.
Thats why I said what I did, because you mentioned you and your coached didnt "mesh" well on the field ( your own words) and he took the fun out of the game for you, so it sounds like you both were ready to move on.
Best of luck to you.
LHP2017 posted:TPM posted:As a 2017, and so much wanting to play at the next level , instead of worrying about this summer, you should be worrying NOW about where you will be after the summer.
You state that you want to "enjoy" next summer, do you have a commitment as yet.
I had thrown a great 6 inning game giving up 2 ER to our defending state champs but a defensive breakdown lost us the game
Giving up 2 earned runs doesn't exactly help either, Hoss.
ironhorse posted:LHP2017 posted:TPM posted:As a 2017, and so much wanting to play at the next level , instead of worrying about this summer, you should be worrying NOW about where you will be after the summer.
You state that you want to "enjoy" next summer, do you have a commitment as yet.
I had thrown a great 6 inning game giving up 2 ER to our defending state champs but a defensive breakdown lost us the game
Giving up 2 earned runs doesn't exactly help either, Hoss.
The loss of the game is on everyone, offense and defense.
I find it fascinating how this thread turned.
CaCO3Girl posted:I find it fascinating how this thread turned.
Me too. Go back and read it again. And maybe again.
I agree with one or two others who posted that this player really isnt dedicated.
The giveaway, stating this was supposed to be his year because he was the ace, but half way throughthe season things went south, because he missed one day of practice, or the degense blew the game so he wss called upon again?
Listen if he wants to make a change, thats fine, just do it because you want to.
JMO
TPM posted:CaCO3Girl posted:I find it fascinating how this thread turned.
Me too. Go back and read it again. And maybe again.
I agree with one or two others who posted that this player really isnt dedicated.
The giveaway, stating this was supposed to be his year because he was the ace, but half way throughthe season things went south, because he missed one day of practice, or the degense blew the game so he wss called upon again?
Listen if he wants to make a change, thats fine, just do it because you want to.
JMO
So, a 17 year old comes on a baseball board to ask how best to tell his coach he doesn't want to play for him anymore and leaves with many opinions on his dedication and possible ability to even play college baseball. I have to say I did not see that one coming.
CaCO3Girl posted:TPM posted:CaCO3Girl posted:I find it fascinating how this thread turned.
Me too. Go back and read it again. And maybe again.
I agree with one or two others who posted that this player really isnt dedicated.
The giveaway, stating this was supposed to be his year because he was the ace, but half way throughthe season things went south, because he missed one day of practice, or the degense blew the game so he wss called upon again?
Listen if he wants to make a change, thats fine, just do it because you want to.
JMO
So, a 17 year old comes on a baseball board to ask how best to tell his coach he doesn't want to play for him anymore and leaves with many opinions on his dedication and possible ability to even play college baseball. I have to say I did not see that one coming.
I guess that you didnt.
I've been out of town, so I'm late to this party.
I'm a little confused, too. Generally, coaches communicate most articulately through their lineup cards. When you have conflicting signals--the lineup cards say you're not part of his plans, and the reminder to come to the tryout says you might be--it would be prudent to believe the lineup card.
After getting benched for the last portion of the season and the playoffs, regardless of the reason, it's sufficient to tell him you're joining another team because you need a greater assurance of playing time.
Best wishes,
I did misread the OP as to game vs. practice. However, that does not lead me to change my comments.
Whether the player or the parent realizes it or not, that is a big deal. And if they are told it's a big deal and their response is not to accept that, but rather, to argue with it, then that is an even bigger deal.
I'm not looking to make an enemy here, but the idea that a high school junior or senior cannot be left at home alone for even one day is one that is of fairly recent vintage, part of the ongoing trend towards helicopter parenting. Bear in mind, we're talking about a young man who's supposed to be just a little over a year from being away from home 100% of the time. If he can't handle a single day on his own, that transition is going to be one heckuva crash course.
Moreover, players have been known to be left with trusted friends' families, or with relatives. That is, the alternative is not necessarily "home alone," though again, I have no problem at all with a 17-year-old being on his own for a few days.
It's been quite a long time since I was that age, to be sure, but I was left alone many times, and no one had a second thought about it. As far as I know, the human genome has not changed that much in the intervening generation. What has changed is the insistence that high school age children be treated like pre-adolescent children in terms of the level of responsibility and trust afforded to them, even in cases where there is no history of misbehavior.
But while more and more parents are of that mindset, the high school, American Legion, and collegiate coaching community is not on board with them. So be warned, you are walking into a conflict that will not end the way you want it to, because even if you think you're right, the other side controls the outcome.
My point remains, if you are trying to demonstrate that you are ready to be a collegiate player, you shoot yourself in the foot if you plan activities that conflict with your team commitments. Whether or not you understand it, the impression you are making on those whose opinion of you will determine your outcome is strongly negative.
I think any coach would excuse an absence that was truly justified. A family funeral or wedding, for example. Beach week doesn't cut it. The family can still go, if it needs to go in June or July and not in August. It's just that the player needs to stay behind in order to honor his commitment.
I also want to be clear that I'm talking about a rising senior who is playing Legion ball and aspiring to college ball. I am not suggesting that a 12u travel ball kid be handled the same way. But I would respectfully suggest that a 17-year-old not be treated like a 12u kid.
Midlo Dad posted:I did misread the OP as to game vs. practice. However, that does not lead me to change my comments.
Whether the player or the parent realizes it or not, that is a big deal. And if they are told it's a big deal and their response is not to accept that, but rather, to argue with it, then that is an even bigger deal.
I'm not looking to make an enemy here, but the idea that a high school junior or senior cannot be left at home alone for even one day is one that is of fairly recent vintage, part of the ongoing trend towards helicopter parenting. Bear in mind, we're talking about a young man who's supposed to be just a little over a year from being away from home 100% of the time. If he can't handle a single day on his own, that transition is going to be one heckuva crash course.
Moreover, players have been known to be left with trusted friends' families, or with relatives. That is, the alternative is not necessarily "home alone," though again, I have no problem at all with a 17-year-old being on his own for a few days.
It's been quite a long time since I was that age, to be sure, but I was left alone many times, and no one had a second thought about it. As far as I know, the human genome has not changed that much in the intervening generation. What has changed is the insistence that high school age children be treated like pre-adolescent children in terms of the level of responsibility and trust afforded to them, even in cases where there is no history of misbehavior.
But while more and more parents are of that mindset, the high school, American Legion, and collegiate coaching community is not on board with them. So be warned, you are walking into a conflict that will not end the way you want it to, because even if you think you're right, the other side controls the outcome.
My point remains, if you are trying to demonstrate that you are ready to be a collegiate player, you shoot yourself in the foot if you plan activities that conflict with your team commitments. Whether or not you understand it, the impression you are making on those whose opinion of you will determine your outcome is strongly negative.
I think any coach would excuse an absence that was truly justified. A family funeral or wedding, for example. Beach week doesn't cut it. The family can still go, if it needs to go in June or July and not in August. It's just that the player needs to stay behind in order to honor his commitment.
I also want to be clear that I'm talking about a rising senior who is playing Legion ball and aspiring to college ball. I am not suggesting that a 12u travel ball kid be handled the same way. But I would respectfully suggest that a 17-year-old not be treated like a 12u kid.
Just to clarify Midlo Dad. One of your 16 year old Junior players says:
"Coach, my mom and dad said the whole family is going on vacation in a month and I have to go. They have scheduled it so I won't miss any games, but I will miss one practice, so I wanted to give you plenty of notice."
This is unacceptable?
I didn't see this thread going anywhere near the direction it has gone but I guess it is the internet and people feel they can say whatever they want. If you want to question my level of dedication that is fine, you're evaluating my life based on a few posts on the internet which obviously makes you experts. The fact that I don't spend every waking moment of my life thinking and playing baseball like some of you feel like I should be does not correlate with how dedicated I am. FWIW I cut the vacation short for me as I went home early in order to not miss anything else that I knew was scheduled, this practice was called the night before and I had already told them I'd be gone. Some of you will call this an excuse but it really isn't, it's over and as I said, we have already talked and I am playing with a different team this summer.
CaCO3Girl posted:Midlo Dad posted:I did misread the OP as to game vs. practice. However, that does not lead me to change my comments.
Whether the player or the parent realizes it or not, that is a big deal. And if they are told it's a big deal and their response is not to accept that, but rather, to argue with it, then that is an even bigger deal.
I'm not looking to make an enemy here, but the idea that a high school junior or senior cannot be left at home alone for even one day is one that is of fairly recent vintage, part of the ongoing trend towards helicopter parenting. Bear in mind, we're talking about a young man who's supposed to be just a little over a year from being away from home 100% of the time. If he can't handle a single day on his own, that transition is going to be one heckuva crash course.
Moreover, players have been known to be left with trusted friends' families, or with relatives. That is, the alternative is not necessarily "home alone," though again, I have no problem at all with a 17-year-old being on his own for a few days.
It's been quite a long time since I was that age, to be sure, but I was left alone many times, and no one had a second thought about it. As far as I know, the human genome has not changed that much in the intervening generation. What has changed is the insistence that high school age children be treated like pre-adolescent children in terms of the level of responsibility and trust afforded to them, even in cases where there is no history of misbehavior.
But while more and more parents are of that mindset, the high school, American Legion, and collegiate coaching community is not on board with them. So be warned, you are walking into a conflict that will not end the way you want it to, because even if you think you're right, the other side controls the outcome.
My point remains, if you are trying to demonstrate that you are ready to be a collegiate player, you shoot yourself in the foot if you plan activities that conflict with your team commitments. Whether or not you understand it, the impression you are making on those whose opinion of you will determine your outcome is strongly negative.
I think any coach would excuse an absence that was truly justified. A family funeral or wedding, for example. Beach week doesn't cut it. The family can still go, if it needs to go in June or July and not in August. It's just that the player needs to stay behind in order to honor his commitment.
I also want to be clear that I'm talking about a rising senior who is playing Legion ball and aspiring to college ball. I am not suggesting that a 12u travel ball kid be handled the same way. But I would respectfully suggest that a 17-year-old not be treated like a 12u kid.
Just to clarify Midlo Dad. One of your 16 year old Junior players says:
"Coach, my mom and dad said the whole family is going on vacation in a month and I have to go. They have scheduled it so I won't miss any games, but I will miss one practice, so I wanted to give you plenty of notice."
This is unacceptable?
We as parents were all in with everything about HS and travel ball. He wasnt allowed to miss any practice, any games, not including illness. Only missed one HS game, for a junior recruiting day.
Even missed AC games because his CM travel team made regionals.
I get what midlo is saying.
LHP2017 posted:I didn't see this thread going anywhere near the direction it has gone but I guess it is the internet and people feel they can say whatever they want. If you want to question my level of dedication that is fine, you're evaluating my life based on a few posts on the internet which obviously makes you experts. The fact that I don't spend every waking moment of my life thinking and playing baseball like some of you feel like I should be does not correlate with how dedicated I am. FWIW I cut the vacation short for me as I went home early in order to not miss anything else that I knew was scheduled, this practice was called the night before and I had already told them I'd be gone. Some of you will call this an excuse but it really isn't, it's over and as I said, we have already talked and I am playing with a different team this summer.
So the reasons you lost your start, you feel was because you missed a practice? You made it clear you didnt mesh with the coach either.
Just trying yo give advice when making decisions, use no excuses as to reasons why.
LHP2017 posted:I didn't see this thread going anywhere near the direction it has gone but I guess it is the internet and people feel they can say whatever they want. If you want to question my level of dedication that is fine, you're evaluating my life based on a few posts on the internet which obviously makes you experts. The fact that I don't spend every waking moment of my life thinking and playing baseball like some of you feel like I should be does not correlate with how dedicated I am. FWIW I cut the vacation short for me as I went home early in order to not miss anything else that I knew was scheduled, this practice was called the night before and I had already told them I'd be gone. Some of you will call this an excuse but it really isn't, it's over and as I said, we have already talked and I am playing with a different team this summer.
I confess I have not read this thread through so I don't know exactly what's been said, but, just based on the original post: around here kids miss Legion games and practices all the time, without penalty, as long as they tell the coach in advance. They miss them for vacations, for summer academic camps, for baseball camps and showcases, pretty much anything legit. Rosters are big for that reason, and coaches pull players from younger teams as necessary. It's not HS ball. It's not life-or-death. It's Legion. It's a way to develop skills in the summer, have fun and get some reps.
CACO3GIRL,
"Unacceptable" is probably too strong a word. "Inappropriate" or "presumptuous" might fit better.
I don't think a parent should encourage or expect the player to renege on his commitment, much less pressure him to do so. I don't think the parent should fight a turf battle with the coach, putting the player in the middle. I think a player should know that he is not to walk into the coach's office and say how things will be; at most, he may go there to present a request for advance permission. And I would suggest that the coach should respond by appreciating the position the parents have put the player into, and suggesting that the player find a third path.
I would add that a Legion team, like a travel/exposure team, has a very short season. Any questions about the team's coaches' attitudes about missing practices or games should be inquired about prior to making the commitment to the roster. Committing first, getting into the season, and then telling the coach you've decided not to be there one day is not appropriate. Your options are to discuss arrangements in advance, or to accept that if the team won't accommodate you, your choices might be reduced down to either playing for that team and living with the restrictions or finding another team that will accommodate your priorities.
There are, after all, literally dozens of team options out there, and they all have different policies. Find one that suits you; don't ask the one you choose to change mid-season to suit you. If every parent did that, the team could not function.
LHP2017 posted:Midlo Dad posted:I have to echo that. If you are the guy who misses summer games for a vacation (that could have been missed or just moved into August), you are not really suited to college baseball. Why are you even pursuing college baseball? Do you really know what commitment that entails? Or are you just doing it because your friends are all doing it and you think it's expected of you?
These are serious questions because (a) college players don't miss games for vacations -- not in the fall, spring or summer; and (b) guys who want to become college players play until they get recruited, then continue to play even after committed so as to prepare to play in college, and they never miss games for other things because baseball is always their # 1 thing outside of the classroom. (I might make an exception for a family wedding or funeral but it has to be something on that level, not something optional like a week at a beach house.)
As for tryouts, I don't think you have to go to any tryout for any team you don't want to be a part of. If your coach calls you or sees you and asks why you weren't there, the answer is, you decided to go in a different direction. Take care not to get sucked into an ongoing discussion that invites you to criticize him. He may even ask for reasons but you should refrain from giving them. It's sufficient to say, "I looked at all my options and felt this one was the best fit for what I want to get out of my fall ball experience."
You are not entitled, even if it seems like he's asking for it, to criticize your coaches or other elders to their faces. (And behind their backs is not so good, either.)
You are, however, entitled to make your own life decisions and have adults respect the fact that, irrespective of how they feel about it, they are your decisions to make.
So if you say the above and he insists on knowing why, just say, "I really don't want to get into an argument," and try to put some distance between you so as to end the conversation.
If you would re-read the post, I missed one practice and no games. Also, thank you for assuming I am not "suited to college baseball" for this reason and solely this reason I'll be sure to let you know how that works out for me! 1) I want to pursue playing in college because it is something I truly love doing and want to keep that up as long as possible, everyday at football I look up at our baseball stadium and wish that I was out there instead, only 7 months to go! 2) I have a pretty good idea of the commitment as it has been preached to me by former teammates time after time, I already train about 12 hours a week factor in school work and a job it amounts to a pretty full week. 3) Again with the assumptions of why I'm not fit for this. I missed this PRACTICE for a short trip that I notified them of a month in advance and then again that same week, I'm only 17 we all need some time to just be a kid for once. Thank you for your opinion
You go kid! Don't let them get to you. They just need something to complain about. "In the old days we walked to school in the snow uphill both ways and came home and ate shoe leather for dinner and nobody complained cause if we did our dad would have..." You know all that macho crap. It was a family vacation vs a legion ball practice... Hope you had a nice time on your vacation. Need to get away from all this silliness sometimes.
and hold on just a second here...isn't LHP2017 going to be graduating HS and then (maybe) playing in college? This thread is about summer 2017?
My 2017 has played for several years for an often discussed on this site national showcase/travel organization but he isn't sure where he will be playing NEXT summer as he is waiting to finalize his college plans and then have a game plan as to what the college coaches would like him to do.
This thread is a great example of why providing too much information can lead you astray. The OP wants to provide lots and lots of context to help the board understand the background, when in fact there is no way an internet message board can understand the complexity of a long-term interaction between humans, and thus a bunch of assumptions get made and things go sideways fairly quickly. He's an edited version of the original post that might have worked better:
I've been training with the coach of our legion team since my sophomore year and played with him the past two years. I'm looking to play for a college prep team in my area that one of my teammates played with last year instead of with this legion team, much better competition and a better schedule. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can tell him im not playing for them this year? I don't want it to end up turning into a thing that effects my status of training with him but really do not want to play legion again this year. Thank you for any feedback.
Ah, live and learn. I hope we didn't chase him away.
