Asking a College Coach Where One Stands in the Recruiting Process

I'll throw out a question to maybe push the conversation.

What, if any, conversation has been had between your son and a coach(es) about the possibility of of an offer?  Please be as specific (without personal/identifying details of course) as I image the different schools may be at different points in the process.

Starting with Power5, is your son potentially a back-up as they chase someone higher on the board?  As it relates to mid-major, are they offering other 2019's or have they mentioned how they have historically operated as it relates to offers?  

Also, does the current communications (subject/tone) maybe provide a backdoor approach where your son could convey this information without necessarily phrasing it so directly?  Sort of like dropping hints?

I'm interested to see what some of the more seasoned posters have to say.

WestCoastPapa posted:

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At what point (if any) is it appropriate to simply tell a head coach or recruiting coordinator, respectfully and politely of course, that he is ready to commit and would like to know where he stands in their recruiting? Especially to an of out of state school that son qualifies for reduced tuition due to high grades and SAT? He has already visited school and has gotten to know the coaches.

This probably isn't the order most people pursue this, but then again most people don't have an abundance of leverage.  The coaches decide what to do and when to do it in almost all cases.  Listen and take their cues.

So, I think you are getting ahead of yourself.   Slow it down.  So, I think when the coaches have demonstrated serious interest (OV, un-OV, send transcripts, request financial package, etc....) it is fair for your son to ask where he stands on their board.   How they answer this question can tell you a lot about how they see him.   In my experience, you will know very quickly.

When they offer, and you have considered all your options then it is alright to tell them you are ready to commit.  

JMO and Good Luck!

2017LHPscrewball posted:

I'll throw out a question to maybe push the conversation.

What, if any, conversation has been had between your son and a coach(es) about the possibility of of an offer?  Please be as specific (without personal/identifying details of course) as I image the different schools may be at different points in the process.

Starting with Power5, is your son potentially a back-up as they chase someone higher on the board?  As it relates to mid-major, are they offering other 2019's or have they mentioned how they have historically operated as it relates to offers?  

Great question - I will stick to the out of state power 5 mentioned in the original post. Although in a power 5, they are not a perennial powerhouse in terms of baseball. This Power 5 has only committed a few 2019s and Recruiting Coordinator told son that they are looking for 3-4 more. RC explained how a typical athletic scholarship package would work and what the expectation was for living off campus after sophomore year to save $$$ by not having to pay on campus dorm/food. RC spoke a lot about the culture of the school and also gave son a tour of the athletic facilities as well as explaining all of the fringe benefits afforded to athletes. So, the "possibility" of an offer was not directly discussed. This is why I'm curious if my advice (not direction, just advice) to son should be to call RC and lay it out there and say "you're my top choice - I'm ready to commit....where do I stand?"     

2017LHPscrewball posted:

I'll throw out a question to maybe push the conversation.

What, if any, conversation has been had between your son and a coach(es) about the possibility of of an offer?  Please be as specific (without personal/identifying details of course) as I image the different schools may be at different points in the process.

Starting with Power5, is your son potentially a back-up as they chase someone higher on the board?  As it relates to mid-major, are they offering other 2019's or have they mentioned how they have historically operated as it relates to offers?  

...more inline with where does son stand on their board, son says "Where do I stand on your board?"

fenwaysouth posted:

WestCoastPapa posted:

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At what point (if any) is it appropriate to simply tell a head coach or recruiting coordinator, respectfully and politely of course, that he is ready to commit and would like to know where he stands in their recruiting? Especially to an of out of state school that son qualifies for reduced tuition due to high grades and SAT? He has already visited school and has gotten to know the coaches.

This probably isn't the order most people pursue this, but then again most people don't have an abundance of leverage.  The coaches decide what to do and when to do it in almost all cases.  Listen and take their cues.

So, I think you are getting ahead of yourself.   Slow it down.  So, I think when the coaches have demonstrated serious interest (OV, un-OV, send transcripts, request financial package, etc....) it is fair for your son to ask where he stands on their board.   How they answer this question can tell you a lot about how they see him.   In my experience, you will know very quickly.

When they offer, and you have considered all your options then it is alright to tell them you are ready to commit.  

JMO and Good Luck!

Great topic, WestCoastPapa.

My son has not found recruiting coordinators to be very forthcoming on the topic of "where do I stand on your board?" 

My takeaway is that unless the kid is an overwhelmingly clear cut recruit -- that is, there is no doubt they want him in their program -- these coaches want to keep their options open for as long as they can. If you're a "B" recruit (what I would describe as "acceptable, but not overwhelming") -- you're either a back-up in case they don't get someone rated higher, or you're someone who would be OK, but they want to see if they can get someone better -- then their job is to keep you warm in the meantime. So they respond to the kids' texts right away, they offer encouragement, they offer an un-OV, they give you the tour, etc., but they don't need to move, now. 

I would refrain from hinting where I might go based on other factors.  A good thorough program already knows what the player can get academically/grants if they are really interested.  They want to give minimum athletic but at the same time the overall picture would be little money spent out of pocket of student.  Is your son the one discussing this with HC or RC?  Another reason to stay away.  Asking a lot from a 17/18 year old to know what to say in a non-confrontational manner.  I myself never spoke to the coaches during the process except on the school visit.  All communications were done through son.  Correct me if wrong but I would guess coaches want to deal with player directly, to get an idea of their personality, thoughts, etc.  Last thing they want is a vocal parent who is used to daddy ball.  For my son he had 2 D-1 schools narrowed down.  #2 on list called and made an offer, nothing fantastic but not minimum.  15 minutes later #1 school called son to "find out where he is at". Uncanny both offers came in within 15 of each other, as if #1 school "knew" an offer was just made (did not post on social media).  Luckily my son and I chatted for 14 minutes (lol) about the offer and what the next step was, which included to be honest with both coaches, and to call coach #1 the following day to inform him son will be deciding "soon".  Anyways, when HC called 15 mins later son told him he received an offer from a school and was seriously considering it.  Son played it cool in that no particulars were told, just hinted at a range.  HC made an offer and said that is all he can do.  Son asked for 72 hours to think about it, they hung up.  10 mins later HC called back and gave a better offer after "juggling" some numbers around.  Son said  he will let HC know in 24 hrs after he tells parents what is happening.  We discussed many things but ultimately decided not to make this a bidding war.  Both coaches were upfront  with the best they can do, and son made a point to tell them both HC do not know anything about the other's offer, that we were happy with a realistic offer.  It goes a lot to character I feel.  Sure if we made it a bidding war son might have gotten a better deal, but end of day he was going to his #1 choice school on a scholarship.  I'm glad I don't have to go through that again lol.

This might be a little simplistic but....

Your son to the recruiting coach: "I want to make sure I am totally prepared and able to make an informed decision when the time comes--regardless of where I wind up. Can you share with me what your timetable is?"

Trust In Him posted:

I would refrain from hinting where I might go based on other factors.  A good thorough program already knows what the player can get academically/grants if they are really interested.  They want to give minimum athletic but at the same time the overall picture would be little money spent out of pocket of student.  Is your son the one discussing this with HC or RC?  Another reason to stay away.  Asking a lot from a 17/18 year old to know what to say in a non-confrontational manner.  I myself never spoke to the coaches during the process except on the school visit.  All communications were done through son.  Correct me if wrong but I would guess coaches want to deal with player directly, to get an idea of their personality, thoughts, etc.  Last thing they want is a vocal parent who is used to daddy ball.  For my son he had 2 D-1 schools narrowed down.  #2 on list called and made an offer, nothing fantastic but not minimum.  15 minutes later #1 school called son to "find out where he is at". Uncanny both offers came in within 15 of each other, as if #1 school "knew" an offer was just made (did not post on social media).  Luckily my son and I chatted for 14 minutes (lol) about the offer and what the next step was, which included to be honest with both coaches, and to call coach #1 the following day to inform him son will be deciding "soon".  Anyways, when HC called 15 mins later son told him he received an offer from a school and was seriously considering it.  Son played it cool in that no particulars were told, just hinted at a range.  HC made an offer and said that is all he can do.  Son asked for 72 hours to think about it, they hung up.  10 mins later HC called back and gave a better offer after "juggling" some numbers around.  Son said  he will let HC know in 24 hrs after he tells parents what is happening.  We discussed many things but ultimately decided not to make this a bidding war.  Both coaches were upfront  with the best they can do, and son made a point to tell them both HC do not know anything about the other's offer, that we were happy with a realistic offer.  It goes a lot to character I feel.  Sure if we made it a bidding war son might have gotten a better deal, but end of day he was going to his #1 choice school on a scholarship.  I'm glad I don't have to go through that again lol.

Some of the academic grants are from High School GPA/Standardized test scores, of course.  But future years academic grants are often dependent on their college grades.  Understand what financial risk you are assuming after you research the academic monies.

Example around here.  Freshman year, academic monies paid based on his HS grades/scores.  sophmore year, doesn't maintain the 3.2 GPA required to continue getting the academic money.  Dad gets a $17,000 bill he wasn't expecting, with possibly two more similar bills coming next two years.

Trust In Him posted:

I would refrain from hinting where I might go based on other factors.  A good thorough program already knows what the player can get academically/grants if they are really interested.  They want to give minimum athletic but at the same time the overall picture would be little money spent out of pocket of student.  Is your son the one discussing this with HC or RC?  Another reason to stay away.  Asking a lot from a 17/18 year old to know what to say in a non-confrontational manner.  I myself never spoke to the coaches during the process except on the school visit.  All communications were done through son. 

I provide advice and suggestions to my son. Never ever would I get myself in the recruiting mix by speaking to a college coach. That is sage advice that is all over HSBBW and I have personally told parents that I know not to do it. The kid should be handling everything, with an acceptable level of guidance from the parent. 

We knew people were seriously interested when they asked son when he was planned to commit, which was September of his senior year of HS.

If there's no offer on the table, and no inquiry as to when your son will choose a school, I don't think there's anything to think about. Let them  know you're interested, when he hopes to commit, and then the ball's in their court.

If your son is a really good ball player and they like him, they will offer, when they are ready to do so.  I think that 2019dad did a good job of explaining that to you.

Keep in mind that it's coaches that recruit players, not the other way around.  This is a tough time of year, teams are playing 4 -5 games a week. Coaches are on the road recruiting when not playing. Practice when not playing.

I've felt the anxiety. Mine wasn't necessarily in the same position as yours but it was palpable and i had a bad case of FOMO. Great advice on this board as usual. Be patient, remain calm. 

slotty posted:

This might be a little simplistic but....

Your son to the recruiting coach: "I want to make sure I am totally prepared and able to make an informed decision when the time comes--regardless of where I wind up. Can you share with me what your timetable is?"

Not sure of this exact wording, but a 16-17 yo having a casual conversation with the RC/PC/other probably would not be disqualified for making some inquiries into a school's timetable for moving forward with their remaining class recruits.  The other comment about not coaching up a kid too much is also great advice.  Some kids can already talk like a used car salesman and would have no problem working this conversation and adapting to the various possible responses.  Others kids might have to write it down beforehand and might freeze up if they get any  mild push back.  This idea of wanting to understand the timeline could simply be spoken out loud and not even phrased as a question as in...

"I want to make sure I am totally prepared and able to make an informed decision when the time comes--regardless of where I wind up. It would be nice to get a decision made but I'm not sure what everybody's timetable is.  In the meantime I'm really looking forward to this summer and senior season."

Coach on the other end may quickly change the subject (at which point you might guess that there is no immediate offer likely) or they might take this opportunity to maybe probe a little further and maybe throw out some additional information ("We're waiting for the high school season to wrap up and maybe seem some early summer ball." - as in they are still looking - or they may be ready and ask what your son's timetable is.)

I'll repeat my advice that too much coaching could backfire and you cannot afford for your son to be shuffling scripted responses - but if he is at ease with the coach, then simply cracking the door open for the conversation might get him a little further down the road information wise.

Agree with above comments. Wait it out and see how it plays out. In the meantime develop a list of schools your son is or would be interested in and email some coaches. It can't hurt and Definitely helped me in my recruiting process. 

I'm not sure why any parent would leave a negotiation about a college scholarship worth several thousand dollars to maybe over $100K to a 17 or 18 year old. The stakes are way too big. I wouldn't expect any son or daughter to have experience in this. It's hard enough for a parent to learn all there is to it. This board is a great help and it's one thing to have the coach talk to your son about baseball issues but it's quite another to talk about family finances, needs, loans, debt, etc. That's way over 99.9% of these kids. If your kid is the exception, congratulations.

MrMac posted:

I'm not sure why any parent would leave a negotiation about a college scholarship worth several thousand dollars to maybe over $100K to a 17 or 18 year old. The stakes are way too big. I wouldn't expect any son or daughter to have experience in this. It's hard enough for a parent to learn all there is to it. This board is a great help and it's one thing to have the coach talk to your son about baseball issues but it's quite another to talk about family finances, needs, loans, debt, etc. That's way over 99.9% of these kids. If your kid is the exception, congratulations.

I agree it doesn't seem fair for a coach to be having this discussion with a kid, but it's not a negotiation.  The coach either makes an offer or he doesn't.  If you and the kid like the offer you accept, and if you don't like it than you don't accept it.  Sure it's up to you to figure out if the finances work, but other than yes or no, you don't have any negotiating power anyway.

The longer you wait for an offer the more you should be thinking you're further down their recruiting list. This thought should also be used for pecking order of getting on the field after accepting the offer should it come.

There are situations where a kid eventually gets his dream offer. But to the coaching staff he’s seen as a third option insurance policy against the two hotter recruits at the position failing. 

 I think saying no is a negotiating tactic. Saying we can't make it on the amount you're offering is a negotiating tactic. Saying we have other offers coming in and we'll have to see what they are is a negotiating tactic. Sounding disappointed and saying you'll have to see if there's any way you can make it work is a  negotiating tactic.  Life, love, business and sports are all a negotiation. 

MrMac posted:

 I think saying no is a negotiating tactic. Saying we can't make it on the amount you're offering is a negotiating tactic. Saying we have other offers coming in and we'll have to see what they are is a negotiating tactic. Sounding disappointed and saying you'll have to see if there's any way you can make it work is a  negotiating tactic.  Life, love, business and sports are all a negotiation. 

After the top recruits, who get offers quickly I doubt the coach cares if he gets this player or that player on his list as long as the player is a potential fit for the program. There’s a lot of reasonably equal talent after the top cream is gone. It doesn’t provide waiting players a lot of leverage.

MrMac posted:

 I think saying no is a negotiating tactic. Saying we can't make it on the amount you're offering is a negotiating tactic. Saying we have other offers coming in and we'll have to see what they are is a negotiating tactic. Sounding disappointed and saying you'll have to see if there's any way you can make it work is a  negotiating tactic.  Life, love, business and sports are all a negotiation. 

Yes, they are negotiating tactics, but it's not a negotiation.  It's not like you have any opportunity to improve your offer to the coach and meet in the middle.  You can't say, ok I'll increase my kid's velo 5mph in exchange for another 25%.  All you can do is play chicken with yes vs no.

I'm a little late to this party, but here are my thoughts:

As TPM said, coaches recruit the players, not the other way around. Any attempt to accelerate their process is pushing on a rope. It doesn't work.

No matter how serious a coach's interest appears, until he makes an offer, the only thing you know is that he's not yet convinced you're part of his solution. As soon as he is sure, he will move quickly and unambiguously to close the deal.

Telling a coach you're ready to commit isn't likely to create a sense of urgency in him. He has hundreds of emails and voice mails from players who are ready to commit.

Except for the true top-shelf players, it's still early for 2019's.  Most of the D1 action will happen this summer. Focus on preparing to put forth your best foot every chance you get this summer.

Best wishes,

Colleges have boards with preferred recruits listed by position. Literally, a big white board with positions listed across the top and players listed under each position. The top guys get a lot of attention, the guys near the top get good attention, the guys further down get contacted and some attention. If the school gets their top guy(s) at a position, the guys below them will hear silence thereafter. If the tops guys go elsewhere, the guys down the list move up and get more attention.    It's pretty black and white-if a kid is pretty far down the list, his chances are remote.  Our youngest had committed to a D-3 in the fall of his senior year of high school after getting D-1 interests but nothing that sounded very strong. The last week of May, senior year, WVU calls out of the blue asking if he has signed anywhere.  Had never heard from them at all in any way. We figured they got way down their list.   He said thanks but no thanks.      You simply can't push your way up the list. You can play your way up, but can't push your way up.