How does your child pick

A couple of thoughts. Perhaps you should take him on a few very low key unofficial visits right now so he can have a better idea what options are out there.

We did this with my son when he was uncertain how to answer the "how large of a school are you interested in" question on the ACT test applications. I thought, wow, if you can't answer something that basic, we have a long ways to go.

Another thing, if he can't tell you what he DOES want, try asking him about what he knows he doesn't want. There is always more than one way to skin a cat.

Has he been to any showcases etc. to find out where he fits talent wise. It helps for him to have an idea what the competition is like so he can have a better feel for where he fits in.

And don't forget that sometimes it helps to just talk about it with him, without making him give you answers. It is amazing how they might think about it later and come back with ideas they have come up with later.

I am guessing he is a Jr. If so, maybe you just want to just put it off awhile longer. At this point in time, you still have lots of time and maybe he just isn't ready to think about it at all yet.

Good luck. The good news is that at some point in time he will decide HE wants to know. When that happens, you will know.

quote:

Originally posted by Dooer:
I have a reasonably intelligent 16 year old junior that has no idea where to go or what to study.

I also think that if this is true you have a reasonably normal son at this age. I also have a 16-year old (who won't be playing baseball in college) and he doesn't know either. Heck, I have a sophomore in college who still doesn't know what he wants to study. My senior in college changed his major 3 or 4 times.

AParent had some good suggestiions for getting the conversation going, but I don't think you need to force anything just yet.

I brought this up because in another topic there were suggestions that now is the time to start sending introduction letters to college coaches. I have no idea where to start. I would hate to send letters to 5000 different colleges until he makes up his mind.

Son only verbalized once at 16 that he was interested in one school, U of Miami. Never mentioned another school until senior summer. He just told us he wanted to play college ball someday, we just left it at that.
If he is not ready to do it, he's not ready. Ask again in the spring.

As others have said, it's not unusual at all for a 16-yr-old not to know what he wants to study or where he wants to go to college. My older son has changed his career/major choice twice from the age of 16 to his current age of 19, and the college he now very happily attends and plays baseball at was about #5 on his list when he started thinking of colleges at age 16. (On the other hand, my younger son chose his intended career in THIRD GRADE and has not wavered from it, and we do not believe he will change his mind.)

One thing our oldest did at about age 16 was to fill out a couple of informal "interest assessments" - rating on a scale of 1 to 5 statements like "I like to do puzzles", "I like to influence or persuade people", "I like to act in plays", etc. It was an easy and interesting form to fill out, and the answers to a bunch of those statements showed a pattern, which then was matched up to a list of maybe 50 different jobs that were typically a good fit for someone with that combination of interests. The assessment that was most helpful to my son was at http://www.mncareers.org/start_exploring.asp?pageid=se02 . This site was specific to us here in Minnesota, and my son received a related book at "college night" at his HS, which listed colleges in Minnesota and surrounding states that offered majors/degrees needed for those careers. Perhaps you could find a similar college list for your region, or the region where your son might wish to attend college, but the interest survey would apply to any region.

I'm not suggesting that your son has to get everything figured out at age 16, but the tools above helped my son to begin a decision process that evolved over a couple of years, and is still evolving.

Dooer,

Perhaps you could narrow down your son's choices by talking geographics?

My son eliminated 95% of his college options after he decided he wanted "warm" (not "hot") weather and to stay in CA. I then helped him out a little more by often mentioning how much cheaper the UC and State University's were then the private schools!

I'm 47 and I am not sure what I want to do when I grow up!

grateful is right.

This is one of the arguments for going pro rather than attending college first. I know this does not apply to everyone, but it was a contributing factor in my son chosing to sign professionally.


He knew at what school he wanted to play baseball but did not know what he wanted to do if baseball did not work out.

I hope that in the next few years, he realizes what he wants to do after baseball is over. WHEN he goes back to school, he can concentrate on that area.

Good luck to all your boys.

Dooer,
You are so right, it isn't easy to get started. One of the suggestions we received a long time ago that was mentioned here was to actually go to as many college campuses as possible so he has examples. We made a point with travel ball to always see a local college in the area. Sometimes just do a drive-through and sometimes getting out and walking around. Gives them a sense of what large & small campuses mean, urban/rural settings etc. That is the best place to start. Then what we did was continue to ask questions, keeping a page of "likes" on one side and "don't like" on the other that he could review. It's easier if you form the questions for yes or no answers with a teenager! For letter writing, start by sending letters to some local colleges. Its not an exact science and he doesn't have to know for sure, just "maybe" is a good place to start. I would suggest keeping the number under 5,000 though!

Dooer: Oh my Lord! Sending out 5000 letters is just unreasonable. My advice to you is settle on 4950 letters tops! Chop, chop!!

Seriously, the others have made fine suggestions especially RHP05Parent. We have a baseball player in the exact situation so we will be reading these suggestions right along with you. Thanks for posting the question.

JMO

We have not discussed this topic with our son in any indepth way. He seems to have been able to determine for himself what kind of student he is, where he fits on the scale of potential Einsteins and is self-directed to take full advantage of his contacts and connections.

That been said our son has decided he likes being a local kid and isn't interested in breaking the doors down somewhere else. Maybe that's because he has traveled alot. Marin County is a pretty special place to live. So for now he plans to attend our local state college, play ball and room with his closest friends.

He is just a life-is-a-bowl-of-cherries type guy...always positive and joking around.

But worry about what university to transfer too, and what to study, never...he'll cross that bridge when he needs to...as he loves to say...it's time to go to work, and then he takes the mound. Aside from what day he's pitching there's not much else he worries about.

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Athletes already have a major: University Studies

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