Dropped my last one off today

Hey CD.

I had to reply to this one, because I know what she is going through.

I cried for two weeks (off and on) after dropping off my daughter two years ago. I was like a broken hearted teenager, crying at songs that reminded me of her, crying when I went into her room......

But I got better

Honestly it took me totally by surprise; and I have no idea if I will feel the same way for my son next year this time. The mother-daughter thing is totally different. But I can tell you, if my youngest was ALSO my daughter, that would be a four week crying jag.



Just be nice to your wife, and be ready for this to take a while to adjust.

And tell her Skype is great! My d. is in another hemisphere this semester but Skype makes that so much easier.

Good luck !

quote:

Originally posted by BaseballmomandCEP:
Hey CD.

I had to reply to this one, because I know what she is going through.

I cried for two weeks (off and on) after dropping off my daughter two years ago. I was like a broken hearted teenager, crying at songs that reminded me of her, crying when I went into her room......

But I got better

Honestly it took me totally by surprise; and I have no idea if I will feel the same way for my son next year this time. The mother-daughter thing is totally different. But I can tell you, if my youngest was ALSO my daughter, that would be a four week crying jag.



Just be nice to your wife, and be ready for this to take a while to adjust.

And tell her Skype is great! My d. is in another hemisphere this semester but Skype makes that so much easier.

Good luck !

Great tip on Skype. My son played in Columbia one winter and we used Skype to remain close and see each other. A great, affordable technology. After reading your fine response, I am guessing it is a mother/daughter thing

Both of mine go back this week and two more still left at home. I'll tell you, it's a whole lot easier when they go back for their 2nd and 4th year. They survived that "scary" first year, and summer with college students is HARD on parents

ClevelandDad,
I can relate to this one a lot. My wife and I took my oldest off to college three years ago. In two weeks we take our second--and last--off to school, where he will be playing baseball. We will be empty nesters for the first time in over 21 years. I think the empty nester part will be okay, but I know that I will miss baseball season in our house. I coached my son through middle school, then was a fixture at his games through high school and travel ball. It was our thing together and I will miss it. Very special times.

When my youngest started freshman year last fall I got home, sat down and asked myself, "What do I do now?" A few months ago someone asked me what I do. I always tell people I don't define myself by my career. So when pressed what do I do, I responded, "I'm not sure. I'm still trying to figure it out. My youngest headed off to college last fall." I really missed our fall Sundays at a sports bar with chicken wings, Cheesesteaks, fries and being surrounded by football games.

quote:

Originally posted by gamefan:
Both of mine go back this week and two more still left at home. I'll tell you, it's a whole lot easier when they go back for their 2nd and 4th year. They survived that "scary" first year, and summer with college students is HARD on parents

The "I'm an adult now" attitude summer after freshman year can drive you insane.

quote:

The "I'm an adult now" attitude summer after freshman year can drive you insane.

THAT'S for sure. We were pretty good all summer, but the last week or so has been unbearable. I'm sure it's the stress of not being a freshman anymore, and knowing what is in store for her. OMG.

My youngest started her senior year today. After 23 years of getting ready for school, this will be the last time.....I know, we'll be getting ready for college, but it's different. So this is my last "this is the last time" year. It's gonna be weird.

I cried 14 years ago when I took my daughter to college. In a year my son -the baby- will leave. I'm already misty eyed. When he leaves it will be the first time in 33 years I haven't had a kid in the house. No idea how I will react.

Good luck to those opening a new chapter.

This is the first fall in 25 years we dont have a child going to school.Its kinda weird.The empty nest is quiet,at first it was hard.As times has gone by its got easier.I miss the commotion at times of friends and sleep overs.Visits home from the kids are really nice.My 30 year old daughter coming this weekend.My son home in a couple weeks from playing ball.

Thanks for starting this thread CD and thanks to all who have posted their memories....We will be experiencing our empty nest for the first and last time next week when we drop off our son in the Midwest. I guess there is really no preparation for this and you just hope that your child's foundation would be strong enough to endure this life changing event. I know there will be an empty feeling as I am starting to feel knots in my stomach anticipating this event.

Deep within, I feel that the memories and experiences we shared as a family especially this Summer will help all of us get through this.

We were playing catch this weekend and I told my son that I will miss playing catch with him (It suddenly dawned on me that this may be the last time I play catch with him). He told me " Don't worry Dad, I will be back during the Christmas break." That gave me hope and something to look forward to.

I know how you folks are feeling. It was certainly a strange feeling dropping off oldest son a couple years ago. It was hard for me to wrap my head around "the kid in diapers hitting a wiffle ball off a tee in the front yard" was going to be a freshmen in college. I admit there was a slight salty discharge on the ride back home. My wife and I will do the same exercise a couple more times in the next few years when it will be just as difficult.

We drop off my one and only off on the 25th. We already had the Summer of "I'm an adult" and are ready for him to fly the nest. I imagine there will be some tears next weekend.

He finally started cleaning his bedroom yesterday (something we've been bugging him about all Summer). There was a box in the hallway and I asked him what it was. He said, "My trophies." Sure enough, he was pulling all of his trophies (baseball, chess, taekwondo, s*****r, etc.) off of the shelves and putting them in boxes. I told him that was not what we meant by cleaning his room. He stated that he wasn't going to be living there much longer anyways! (Four years isn't long?)

Guess our talk about not moving back in after College must have struck home and he is packing really early.

My son leaves for his sophomore year on Saturday. I am already getting a little sad. The good news is he is very excited about returning. Although he is far away, we still manage to talk most days by Skype. My daughter started calling me every day when she was walking to class and I really enjoyed her daily call at 8:30 am. Now she is overseas and her wonderful voice is always music to my ears.

Oldest left last Saturday for early orientation. Held it together until he was out of sight at the security checkpoint. BTW does anyone else miss walking people to the gate and saying goodbye right before they get on the plane? I spent the day cleaning his room, and as I told a friend, it's weird to see it still clean now. At least we get to see him in a couple weeks for move-in day!

Any tips for those of us who will put our kid on a plan to go to school cross-country (this will be next year as D heads to CALIFORNIA!!) Not the tears part, but the gosh darn practicality!

We dropped our first off this past Tuesday. My wife cried the entire ride (2 hours) there, all while we move him into his dorm, and the entire ride home. I managed to only get choked up with the last kiss and hug as we parted ways. Luckily for me, he's close enough for me to drop in for games. But it won't be the same as coaching him and taking him to hitting practice (however, I'm guessing my shoulder will feel better!). My wife is still adjusting with not getting the good-night kiss and "I love you" when he rolled into the house after a date.

My wife will be going with our daughter for her freshman year orientation next week. She is our oldest and is heading all the way to the other coast. I'm glad I am not going through it in the days before email, texting and Skype.

I cringe now to think that when I headed off to college across country on my own 30+ years ago, I didn't call my parents for a week after I got there.

The youngest made it to his orientation this morning. An 1.5 hour drive. Very unorganized! Talking on the phone at 1:30 in the morning when he had to leave at 5:30am. He still had clothes to wash, etc as it is a two day deal. And to top it off, just before he leaves he asks "How do I get there, what car am I taking...?" Needless to say he made it okay to orientation. Geezus!!!!

It will be tough to see him go next month. The last of the 3 kids. I will certainly miss all the BP and fungo sessions, and just having him home!

Lefty

Sdlefty,

Your son sounds a lot like ours. Our son is also very unorganized. He waits to the last minute on many things. The part that scares me is that he was able to get through high school easily(4.1 gpa). I don't think college is going to be a breeze like high school. I constantly remind him there are no do overs in college. You have to get it right the first time. Our son is a commuter student. I think going away would have been a great experience but financially it wasn't in the cards. Our son's school had what I call a organizational boot camp. We signed him up for it,he had no choice.(today is the last day) It's been great. They spent time working on their first assignment so he is done. He is now very familiar with the school and he has formed some new friends.

I think it's great that your son isn't too far away. You can plan a visit if your missing him and he can get back home if he wants to.

Runningaway,

Good to hear I am not alone. It sure does seem like it most of the time, and I think our son's are the norm. 4 years from now they will be completely different people. I pray!

He is on the BB team, so he will be busy. We will probably get up there for a fall scrimmage or two.

Best of luck to your son!

When I dropped the oldest at college I turned to the other and said, "Know I'm going to know who did it without an argument." When I dropped my youngest off at college I noticed "it" didn't happen anymore.

A seasoned parent here said " once they leave that bedroom down the hall, they are gone."

That didn't resonate with me until my last of four, our baseball player, went off to school. The following 12 months were a bigger adjustment period than any of us envisioned. Mom really didn't know what to do with herself. She no longer had to do wash every day nor cook for what was seemingly an Army when you are feeding an athlete.

I had the biggest awakening; no involvement in his daily baseball life. We shared a lot, but much of our lives revolved around baseball for many years so that was a real eye opener. I finally have come to peace with the fact that baseball is now a part of HIS world mainly, as is school, his relationships and what he plans to do with the rest of his life.

He grew from a boy to a man that first year and by his Junior year he was truly matured. Wow, it seems as it happened so fast. The change was quicker with him and more shocking than with my daughters!

It's all just another chapter in the journey, it's all good if not better. I can't wait to see what awaits him around the next corner...

Enjoy, relax and just let it happen!

I have to say that I've enjoyed continuing my dad and I's baseball relationship in a way that has nothing to do with my career; our following of the White Sox. When I got to college, even though the time commitment was greater I felt that I was taking baseball less seriously. I worked very hard, but working on academics in my free time instead of harping on whatever just happened on the baseball field with mom and dad gave me a completely different (and IMO more productive) outlook on things. My dad and I rarely talk about my own baseball anymore, but we are always watching the White Sox despite being 500 miles apart. It is rare that we don't at least send a few texts about big events in the game. I managed to get home for just a little while this summer and we were able to catch a game, it was a great time. As I can see the end of my baseball career coming, it is great to know that I can still have lifelong memories over the sport with the guy that introduced me to baseball so long ago.

Wow, when I began reading this tread I had no idea how it would get to me. And I'm not even there yet! Our oldest is a HS freshman this year & our youngest is entering 6th grade (both baseball players with a dancer in the middle) and I can't even imagine how hard college is going to be. Thank you for sharing all your wisdom, it gives me an idea of what's to come & hope that I'll survive it!

I echo CanyonsMom's sentiments. Our only child is just entering his Freshman year of HS, and as I read this thread I begin to wonder how will I will cope when he leaves home. Probably not too good. I just have to remind myself to make the most of every day that I have with him.

Just dropped our son at his apt he sharing this past Wednesday-Thursday. Had moved most his stuff down the previous week - just had to get the last of the little things moved in.

He's our third child, but the first to go "away" to college. My older two attended the local community college. And my 2nd oldest (now 25) is on her own and at ODU for her senior year. Took her more than a few years to get her Associate's Degree.

All went well until it was time for us to return home. Mom lost it, and then to somewhat of a surprise, his younger sister (our 4th) really lost it. Surprising as they are constantly bickering and fighting with each other. Gave him a hug and we were on our way. We'll be back to visit for a few fall ball games (September/October).

He's only 250 miles away, but it sure seems longer. House is getting a little more emptier every few years. There was six of us at one point and now we're down to three with the last one just starting HS. I don't want to think of the empty nest in four more years.

We frequently watch our granddaughter (3 1/2), but it's not quite the same.

"I just have to remind myself to make the most of every day that I have with him."

That's exactly what I did his senior year. We went to every game home and away and all the playoff games. I burned up a lot of vacation hours, but it was well worth it. They were only 2 outs away from going to the final four (state).

We'll drop our youngest, our son Kevin, off this Friday. Fortunately, he's only 90 miles away and we should be able to get to many of his games. And with iPhone FaceTime, Skype, texting, etc., maybe it won't feel like he's so far from us.

But like many have said, baseball has been a big part of our family for a long time, starting with T-ball at age 4 and me coaching him through Little League, our batting cage in our back yard since age 7 and the countless hours we've spent in it, through high school and recruiting, and so on. On top of baseball, he and I have enjoyed fantasy football together since he was 9 years old, as well as just the usual father/son bonding things. It's definitely going to be an adjustment, but I'm confident that he's worked hard and is prepared for managing his life on his own without us around. But we're not naive and also realize that there will likely be some bumps in the road - and we won't be there to even hear about them, let alone try to help. In the long run, that's probably a good thing too (but don't tell my wife ).

My wife and I, though anxious about the soon-to-be void, are also looking forward to no longer having excuses to not get into the gym more often. Between high school basketball and baseball and all the various activities, shopping, laundry, etc., we've spent many nights around dinner time watching his sports (and our daughter's during high school). Like most, many of our meals are planned around these events and we don't end up cooking healthy meals as often as we'd like. With both of us home from work before 5pm though, we're out of excuses now. And that's a good thing too!

We also have a daughter only 25 miles away who will be a junior, but she comes home about once a month. So we won't be 100% without our kid fix.

Good luck to all during this next life transition! It is with pride and eagerness that we send him off, even though at times it feels more like anxiety and sadness. This too shall pass.

-Mike

Our youngest left a week ago for his sophomore year. The house is just not right without him! Even the dog is confused. No crying, just happy for him.

Our oldest graduated from college and moved 10 hours away. That proved to be a huge transition. The good news is - he and his girl friend want to move back to the area when they decide to start a family! Geez, now I feel really old! Time just moves so quickly sometimes!

.

"The good news is - he and his girl friend want to move back to the area when they decide to start a family!"

That's great for North Carolina. Illinois will not be so fortunate with our four children.

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Gotwood, I'm sorry to hear that. Maybe you can move to be near one of them? That's happened a lot around here. Seems like we have more and more parents following their kids.

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Oh my don't feel bad 55mom! I'm actually advising all of my kids to head elsewhere because Illinois is in very sorry shape. We will probably move to an area where some of the kids settle in. We want to get out as well!



.

My daughter is now off to college. For us, it is 34 minutes away but she has to stay on campus because of early morning workouts. Besides, it is good for her to be away. Still, we have only one child and so, this house seems so quiet when she is not home. She has promised to bring some of the team over for a weekend Bar-B-Q.

My oldest left last week. I really didn't think it would bother me too much, but it actually has hit pretty hard.

It hit even harder today when I found out how much I'd be paying a hired hand to mow the lawn every week.

I've been texting daily, but I suspect that'll slow as classes start tomorrow.

I dropped off my Little Girl,my youngest of two last night. My family (the four of us) left our SoCal home early Sunday morning and drove to San Francisco to spend our last couple days together. We made a quick stop off (Chevy Chase/Vacation Style) at the Muir Woods across the Bay and took photos of the kids in front of the Redwood Trees in the same poses from our earlier visit ten years ago. We stopped off at Candlestick and AT&T Ballpark, walked around the Wharf and had dinner at the Hardrock Cafe. It was a very quick visit...and then we were off to Chico State to drop off my daughter. She was extremely excited and ready to begin the next chapter in her life.

I'm happy for her, she's going to do great. The goodbye was a little more emotional than last years with my son. He's only ninety minutes from our home, and we knew we'd see him plenty of times with all the baseball etc...and our daughter was still home. Now we're "Empty Nesters", and our little girl is over nine hours away. My wife took it pretty hard, there was a fair amount of tears left out at the CSUC parking lot last night. I believe they texted one another 4-5 times today on the way home from NorCal and we talked on the phone when we arrived safely at home this evening. I expect that to slow down next week when school starts.

My son goes back to school next month, and will be living in Newport Beach (one block from the sand) with a few of his teammates on the bottom floor of a Duplex. Who's on the top floor? A few girls from his school's volleyball team...yes indeed, life is tough for these young men!

We did a poor job of family planning in regards to having kids so close together, and now we're paying the price of having them in college at the same time. With that said, my wife and I are turning the page and entering a new chapter of our lives...it should be interesting.

As our 2nd son drove off to school yesterday, I texted the youngest kid "Two gone, one to go." She LOVES the quietness of the house without anyone in it. Last December, she wondered why they all had to come home for Christmas. We will take the third one to back to school on Saturday-------and then 3 weeks later, my senior's first official visit. As much as I've liked those rare moments of having the house to myself, I know I will hate it when it will be permanent.

Dropped my son at the airport this morning. He's going 3000 miles away to Georgetown (mom's traveling with him).

I am so proud of him. All of his hard work is paying off now.

I was holding it together pretty well until I started reading this thread. So many of the same experiences. We've been telling him all summer to clean his room and start packing and, of course, he started on Monday.

I'll go out on parents weekend in October and I will get to see him play fall ball, but I will really miss all of the baseball that I've seen him play over the last 13 years.

JH will have a new long toss partner

We dropped our one and only off at school yesterday. Fortunately, he had moved most of his stuff in on Wednesday when his roommate arrived early for a seminar. It poured all day long yesterday! Being wet and cold made it a lot easier to get through the day. I only got a little choked up a couple of times.

The school did a great job separating the parents from the young men (yes, all male school) right at the beginning. They also kept us on the move most of the day to different events (some separately).

Still only feels like he is away at camp. I'm not sure when it will really hit me.

Web's dad,

How cool! Your son is going to be JH's teammate!! I'm going to assume you guys have met and communicated online, but if not you are in for a treat. Congratulations and best wishes to your son.

I took my first of two to school last week also. He has been an incredible joy in my life and the gaping hole in the house seems to be getting bigger as the days go by.
No noise, no arguing, no baseballs hitting wood in the cage, no 3 or 4 extra boys around each night conveniently at dinner time. I miss it all. I hate that his room has been clean all week, that I haven't tripped over shoes once since he's been gone and that my daughter and I had only one load of laundry all week.
The good news is that he isn't home sick at all. Hasn't reached out once unless it's a two word answer to a text I send! I am dying on the vine and he is thriving, I guess that's our reward for a job well done. My friends say that he is doing his job separating and I must let him and that we will develop a routine soon enough. I would really love to know about his day to day life since it's been apart of mine for 18 years but I am trying to let him spread his wings and be grateful for the fabulous relationship we have and how much I have enjoyed him and his friends over the years. I really miss him and all his habits that used to bother me