The Race to Nowhere in Youth Sports

Good piece. Thanks.

Thanks JB, good knowledge! I'm always encouraged when I read something that supports a theory we practiced, even if it was discovered by mistake. 

Bla, bla, bla.  While it is true that some coaches/parents/kids go overboard and it makes great headlines, the vast majority do not.  Parents can choose what type of team they have their kid play on. 

I have never encountered a coach who told my son he can't or shouldn't play other sports.  My son plays for one of the best AAU basketball teams in our state.  Won their last 20 games straight vs. Top level competition.  Several of the kids play baseball in fact my son only plays AAU part time because of his baseball schedule.  The coach is more than cooperative regarding the baseball players.  Nobody's position has been threatened and it is really nice of him to let my son be a part time player.  Same with his travel baseball team.  Nobody there tells the kids they shouldn't play  other sports.  Sometimes I don't know where all this angst comes from.  And by the way we had a guy in my hometown way back in the 70's before it became common place with a batting cage.  Everybody rolled their eyes and everyone ripped on him for being out of control and thinking his kids would be big leaguers some day...  guess what, one made it to the bigs and the other to AAA.  One of them was in my class.  Didn't know him well but seemed to be a nice well adjusted kid to me.  My son constantly asks me to take him to the gym to work on his game.  Most of the time I say no cause I am tired or just plain don't want to.  Have these people ever thought that some of the more motivated kids truly love the game and can't get enough of it?

Great article while some here say they have not seen or it does not apply to them that is great but I have seen it and heard it said. My experience is that there are some sports that are worst than others when it comes to specialization. I do agree as kids get older that they might gravitate to one or two sports that they enjoy....but telling a 9 year old he/she needs to play one sport and play it year round in my opinion is not good. 

 

The point in the article about college coaches liking the  multiple sport athlete is well founded.......I heard many college coaches comment to my son during his recruiting process they liked that he played more than one sport in high school.

I second Golfman's bla, bla, bla.  100 years ago, HS graduation rates were hovering at 10%.  12 year olds were working in textile mills or the fields.  While there are overbearing parents making kids play too much sports, it's the minority.  The kids will be alright either way.

I actually agree with quite a bit of the article.  I must admit that I have worried before that if we didn't get Ryno lessons, or go to optional workouts when offered, that he would get left behind.  Although, I will also say that he wanted to do it.  He LOVES Baseball, and any chance he can get, he takes advantage of it.  I don't think he has missed out on his childhood, I think it has been his childhood, and he will remember it fondly.

I think there is a difference between having your kid play a sport at a highly competitive level versus specialization, and this article lumps the two together and highlights the problems that result.  To some kids, rec ball is just not fulfilling even if you are playing two or more sports.

 

In my son's situation, he wanted to play baseball and s****r, and he wanted to play both of them on competitive club/travel teams rather than the local rec leagues.  He loved both sports and didn't know which he favored and we didn't want him to have to make that decision.  Both of these teams played year round, but we were very clear with both coaches (before joining the teams) on a couple of points:

• Spring is baseball season and baseball takes priority for any and all conflicts.  Fall was s****r season and took priority.  Summer was also baseball season.  I suppose if either coach had a problem the conversation would have stopped here...
• Whenever he couldn't make a game or practice, or had to leave early (or arrive late), we told the coach as far as possible in advance.
• We were very upfront with all the parents involved about his dual-sport situation.
• We told our son he had to work extra hard in practice so the coach knows he is serious about the game.

His coaches were always great about his situation and never game him or us a hard time.  I think open communication had a lot to do with this.  He personally benefitted from the different nature of the two sports, both mentally and physically.  Today he plays baseball and football...

Competitive sports are not for everyone, each kid and family has a different tolerance level. I know people that spend their money and vacations all over the country going to baseball and softball games. They might play 60-90 games a summer and take a few weeks off before they start their fall ball. At the same time there is some folks out their that will only play 15 league games, and maybe a tournament against all local talent and are as happy as can be. The rec team families can't imagine touring the region trying to find some competition, and they often wonder why Jr. can't make the high school team too. These articles float around every once in awhile and the rec group will read it one way and the competitive group will see it the other way. 

I think people defending competitive 9 year old sports don't realize they are the people the artical is talking about.

Well doc I think traveling all over the state playing "competitive" 9 year old baseball is silly and jr. will have no problem making the HS team.

So you wouldn't drive Scotty 100 miles to play in a national chess tournament? Or fly him to the National spelling bee in Maryland if he was good enough? I believe most Americans are competitive by nature and some can't stomach it as well. I sure am thankful for a bunch of good men that didn't shy away from what Japan and Germany was throwing at us in WW2.

 

 I know 2 girls (young women) who have gold medals in softball for team USA.......they didn't get there spending their summers playing rec ball.

 

Live and let live.  I don't go around criticizing rec leagues.  I don't care if people put their kids in rec Leagues.  Its none of my business.  Can a kid come out of rec ball and play college someday?  Sure theoretically.   But how many of those kids WANT to play rec ball?  I have been around a lot of travel teams either that my son played on or teams we have come to know well through competition.  Some coaches I would like my son to play for some I would not.  But still I have never heard even one of them tell kids they can't play other sports.  I love traveling with my son to his baseball stuff.  I went into education to coach basketball.  It was my first love.  I coached baseball because they told me I had to coach two sports.  I enjoyed baseball but basketball was my first love.  When my son came along it was HIM who converted ME.  It was because of HIS love of baseball that baseball became my first love.  My other son is a top level swimmer.   Plays no basketball or baseball.  I never went to a swim meet in my life before my kids swam.  I love my kids and I love what they love not the other way around.  And yes I get totally into their sports and helping them improve and go as far as they can.  Play/swim for.the best organizations they can get into.  I don't think we should have to apologize or feel somehow slimey because we do all we can to help our kids achieve THEIR dreams.

Where a kid plays his prepubescent sports, how much and at what level isn't going to have a bearing on his ability to play in high school or college. Girls mature sooner. But they don't have a need to play more at elite levels until eleven or twelve. My daughter was a very late bloomer physically. Until she matured and grew she wasn't good in sports that involved contact. She went from not playing middle school basketball, to starting on the freshman team to being in the varsity rotation as a soph in a large classification high school. Until high school her basketball was rec ball.

 

My son turned down the ultimatums in soccer. At eleven he was invited to join a nationally premier club program at the U12 level. He was also asked to join the U12 Junior Olympic team. All they wanted was for him to give up baseball and basketball. 

 

After being the starting point guard on the high school freshman basketball team he was cut from the basketball program for missing all the optional off season workouts and not playing on a summer basketball team. He was already playing varsity soccer and was expected to be a varsity starter in baseball. His summer was spent playing baseball and attending soccer goalie camp. A couple of people with far more extensive basketball resumes than the high school basketball coach told me the coach was out of his mind cutting my son. The coach didn't like his players playing other sports. The upside was having the winter free helped my son prepare for baseball and add weight and strength.

       
       


To answer in order. No and no. I questioned driving my child across town when he was 9. So per your argument you feel 10 year old children should go to war. I'm not much of a history buff but I think I would have read about 9 and 10 year olds being drafted in WWII.
You do comprehend the artical was about children right. I don't think anyone has a problem with a 14 year old finding better competition. In 20 plus years of coaching 9-12 year old football. I've never had a 9 year old say. Ya know coach. I think I'm a little to dominated for this league. I think I need to find better competition.  I've heard a few parents say that. Of coarse those are the parents articals like this are about.

Exactly competitive ball is not for everyone including the families. If you are better suited at the rec league well..that's fine. I just find it strange how hard people try to justify to not playing the higher levels and i'm sitting here agreeing with them...it's not for everyone!

 

I think in most sports the competition does get a little harder the further you advance. If you look around you can always find an example that fits your needs. Player A never played travel ball and spent 5 years in the minors, or George Burns smoked cigars and lived to be 140.

 

 I know I'm a little old fashion and I am proud of that, but I still believe in having a good sparring partner before the big fight!

I don't understand your point. I am extremely competitive. I come from an extreemly competitive family but what does a competitive family have to do with a 9 year old.

Uh - 2 in my family.  One has made it to the big leagues.  The other was a D1 All American last year.

 

Both wanted to play rec ball through the age of 15.

 

No regrets.  Nothing "theoretically" either.  Fact.

You are a lucky man!  And your son is even luckier!!  I know plenty of college and big league ballplayers and most of them have encountered such coaches.

 

Sad, but true.

 

The article has merit.  Good for you if it hasn't entered your world. Sadly, it may be coming to a neighborhood near you soon too!!  I think warm weather parents face it more than other parts of the country.

       
       
As I said live and let live.  Not disputing anybodies right to do anything.  And a case study of two or 4 or even 100 is pretty invalid.  But again it makes no difference to me where your kids played.  As I said its none of my business.  Those of us on this side of the debate are simply saying we shouldn't be made out as monsters of some sort because we choose to do things the way our sons want to do it.  Plus some kids are naturally gifted and it doesn't matter what level they play at.  Other kids who are borderline may need that to sharpen their skills.  And maybe it just doesn't make a bit of difference where kids play their youth ball.  So we are right back to my original statement.  Live and let live.  There is no moral high ground here.  Just different paths hoping for the same destination.

       
       
and you are right he is lucky.  I really appreciate the way his travel baseball and AAU basketball programs go about their business.

I don't want you to take this personal, because I don't even know you. But some of these programs require a huge commitment to be a part of. Practice schedules, travel, expenses, tough coaches and more. Other things have to be worked out or removed from your schedule like summer camp, weekends at the lake. However there are many people across the country that want to travel and play this type of ball and they manage to work it out and have fun doing it, usually working in some nice vacations along the way and there are folks that don't want any part of this, and beating the neighboring town Greenville Grasshoppers is good enough.   But my point is there is always somebody trying to tell us how bad it is for kids to have this much fun playing baseball, or AAU basketball. What is the right age to start playing good competition and having fun? 

 

 

 

Doctor I'm not disagreeing with any of that. My son is 14. He will play in 5 different states next year. But he's 14 not 9. I don't know what age it is to start playing more competitive ball. I look at it kinda like a babtism. When ever the child is old enough to make an informed decision about it. For himself. For my son that was 13 for another it maybe 15 or 11. I don't have a problem with travel. Even at young ages. What I have a problem with is the sales pitch of a kid must play or be left behind. I have a problem with parents forcing a child into it at their benifit and not the child's.

Last spring my 7 year old daughter was asked to fill in for a 9U team. They had an outbreak of strep and the coach was desperate. We let her go. On Saturday I would say 90% of all the girls out there looked like they were having a ball. On Sunday that dropped to about 50%. I'm all for the 50% having a ball but my concern is for the 50% that's not. Why are they there? To me this is what this artical was about. Why that 50% was there.

       
       


Sadly it's comming to mine.  Last year I had my first football player tell me his baseball coach wanted him playing fall baseball and not football. The kid was 11. This year we had 5 or 6 between 9-12 years old get that. We even had one that quit to play baseball. Although I didn't mind that one he only played because of dad.

Fortunately there's still some good coaches out there. My son missed a scrimmage this fall because of a soccer tournament. He was going to go to the scrimmage but his coach told him it was soccer season and that should be his first priority. His first game was in the morning same as his scrimmage. Before his second game he looked up and saw his baseball coaches at his soccer game. They came after the scrimmage and stay till they were eliminated. On the way home son said I think I picked the right baseball team. I said yep I agree.

I haven't seen a coach tell a kid to pick which sport, I think it usually becomes obvious at some point where a kid and his skill set will direct him. Telling a 11 year old to stop a sport is ridiculous. I have seen some big hard throwing pitchers have their summer of baseball disrupted because of mandatory football camps and such, that kinda bothers me too!

Have you ever been to a "competitive" 9U tournament?  I have seen them when playing at other ages.  It's a hoot.  The kids have a blast.  The parents have some fun in the sun.  At that age its more about being a "rock star" than the "competition." 

I believe what goes overlooked on a site like this is what some kids are put through who aren't that talented. Their parents have a dream for them. The parents think they can buy talent for their kid with expensive equipment and lessons. If their kids just play all the time the parents believe they will become good players. 

 

I've seen kids get trained up to look like studs on the small fields. The parents start getting delusional. The parents don't dream about high school ball. No, that's a given. The parents dream about college and pro ball.

 

Then the kid gets on the 60/90 field. The game starts passing him by. The first year the parents convince themselves the kid just needs to grow and get stronger. Then 14u ball comes along. The speed of the game accelerates. It's now obvious to everyone but the parents the kid doesn't have it. It's just going to take more money, lessons and time. But the kid knows the truth and wants no part of it. Then the battle begins because the parents are so invested financially and time wise. Their kid is like the failed stock investment the parents can cut the line.

 

There are also a lot of psychologists and psychiatrists getting rich in the youth sports field. There are a lot of kids being driven past their physical and mental breaking points by their parents.

 

The following is an interesting story. Imagine being the #1 high school basketball recruit in the country, getting a full ride to the top program in the country and quitting the sport. The dad blamed it on the kid being homesick. If being homesick was the issue why did the kid head for college, quit basketball and pick up volleyball? Even dad was blind to what was going on because he had a dream. The kid ultimately went back to basketball at the mid major level rather than transferring to a top program. It took time away from the pressure to miss the game.

 

It wasn't fun anymore

 

http://espn.go.com/high-school...-donne-senior-season

 

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10...ewanted=all&_r=0

 

Happily ever after

 

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/08...finally-at-home.html

Golfman Yes I have and quite a few. And I've seen what your describing and it was an absolute pleasure to watch. Although that was mostly in local tournaments with mostly local teams. Unfortunatly I've also seen the other side of the curtain. But I've seen both at rec games. Which is my whole point it's about perspective. If articals like the OP artical would point that out more instead of just harping on the negative and painting with a broad brush, although I guess we all do that at times, people may get more out of them. However as we all know shock sells better. The point of the artical though, in my opinion, wasn't the kids laughing and having a good time. It was the kids on a side field running sprints because little Timmy let one role between his legs and the parents that feel that's ok for a 9 year old.

I think that is starting to change.  There is a high school by me that is actively encouraging multi sport athletes.  They have structured their "optional" summer activities to minimize conflicts.  Morning is lifting and conditioning for all athletes.  Afternoon is broken into sport specific camps.  The kids are given priorities in the event of conflicts.  It's interesting. 

Golf ... The optional workouts he was expected to attend were year round. In addition to the summer schedule he already had, in the fall he played varsity soccer and fall ball. In high school baseball was a year round focus. 

 

The soccer coach wasn't too pleased either. My son was the only varsity soccer player not on an elite summer team. It really ticked him off when my son told him playing goal was like playing shortstop when the ball is outside the 18 yard line and like third when it's inside the 18. But the coach liked to win. So my son played. 

Good athletes will always have choices, average athletes not so much. Most of the position players  on my son's minor league teams were serious multisport athletes in HS.  Its kind of tough to figure out who the good athletes are until they hit puberty.

 

My daughters HS basketball coach told all the parents and girls they had to focus 110% on the season and summer league, he came to our house the next day and said it didn't apply to our daughter.....

That's the same parent that wont get his son the Daisy Red Ryder BB Gun thinking he will shoot his eye out.

       
       
Ok here we have found some common ground.  You are absolutely correct about the small field stars.  On my sons 9 year old team there was one kid in particular who discovered all he had to do was slap the ball towards 3rd base and he usually got on base.  So yes there is a weeding out process.  And I can see some of those situations becoming an issue with parents and child.

True - but we are 2-for-2.  And I know plenty of others too.  You cannot discount that.

 

You have used words like "theoretically" and asked the question 'how many of those kids WANT to play rec ball' <your EMPHASIS, not mine>. I'm just giving you firm evidence that it does indeed happen - quite successfully. 

 

How old is your son?  Just curious because you (so far) have not experienced many of the things that most of us with kids who have gone beyond HS have experienced.  Hopefully, you won't ever experience some of them.  But the article does in fact describe situations we have both witnessed and experienced.

       
       
I will give you the point about age.  My son is a 7th grader about to play his 13u season.  I do think the AAU coach will be cooperative later as well but you never know.  He has already hinted that he is hoping to develop my son into somebody who plays more as he gets older.  And I am aware at some point he will probably have to drop basketball.  But as long as they let him play part time we will roll with it.

Another data point for justbaseball's recent post about age... As I grew older and was coaching my 3rd child I began to easily "typecast" parents of "first born" or "only child". My wife and I made a game of it eventually... First in travel, then at HS, and eventually college - can we pick "them" out of the crowd. Dads or Moms who "hang on every pitch" or "live and die by the last play". More often than not we find out we are correct although it was easier to find that out travel/HS. Try it out some time - go to a game where you don't care who wins - watch the parents. There's a (perhaps not so) fine line between "fan" and "fanatic" as well as "supporting your child" and "hoping or believing one day your child will support you".

 

Just remember (as our longer time members can probably also tell you) some day it all comes to an end. As you look back on it, did your child enjoy his/her experiences?  Did you enjoy them? Any regrets? Don't have regrets later on. My 3 boys will never be professional players. Each has been fortunate to play collegiately - beyond my "dreams" many years ago. None specialized in a single sport - one played d3 football after only picking up the sport as a HS freshman. His time came to and because of an injury... I have another one in his last year pitching at a d3 school - he was usually the "fringe pick" for all star or aau baseball teams. My third only started pitching in HS and now is at a d2 school. Oh and his "preferred" spring sport for a few years was lacrosse which we allowed him to play until he realized he wasn't growing as fast as some of the other boys...

This will be my last comment on this unless I am specifically addressed.  First let me say I 'hang' on every pitch (whatever that means I guess is defined differently by different people) when my son is pitching/hitting.  He is a middle child 3rd of 5.  I 'hang' on every stroke my 2nd born and 4th born swim.  My oldest plays no sports but I would 'hang' on every line she said in a play.  And when she got a full ride academic scholarship to the college of her dreams I facebooked it immediately as a very proud father.  And whatever my 7 year old decides to do when her time comes I will hang on that as well.  My father always said "if you are a ditch digger be the best ditch digger you can be"  my version of that is be the best you you can be.  I don't force my kids to do anything.  They choose that.  But once they do make their choice you can bet I throw myself totally in to it to support their effort to be the best they can be at it.  And yes I do demand they make a full effort to be the best at what they do.  A famous college baseball coach from my town once told me "winning isn't everything but making the effort to win is"  as a coach those are words I have lived by the rest of my life.  If my kids put forth their maximum effort in their chosen pursuits I will be proud of whatever level they reach.   If that makes me over the top or some sort of crazed lunatic in the eyes of some because I don't want my kids to settle for less than their best effort then I would respectfully disagree but in the long run not care what anybody else thinks. 

P.s. everybody is slightly different in how they show their feelings and emotions and how much they share about what they are really thinking.  My guess is we all hang on every pitch.   Some show it outwardly and some don't.   And I guess the question is if you don't. ..  why not?  If its really really important to your kid shouldn't it be that important to you?

Wow what a thread....  Seems like we have some new parents going through what most of us have gone through...  It seems that the folks with multiple players have a little better insight.  I remember when I thought I knew it all, had it all planned out....  such a waste of time.  When to play, when not to play, extra lessons, multiple sports, coaches that agreed with me, coaches that I hated....

 

What I have learned is that it's ok to make a parenting mistake once in a while.  Your player will get over it. It's not the end of their career because YOU pushed him too hard to play travel ball or YOU felt he was safer playing rec ball.

 

I had a son that played rec ball up to 14, that was his skill level. We felt that in time he would get better and have more opportunities.  When he was 16 he played on a travel team, they always won locally but had a tough time outside the state.  When he was 18 he played on a national travel team.  Then to a JUCO  and next year headed to a top 40 D1 school.  He did not get drafted out of high school and he and I do not care.  Don't get me wrong it would have been great if he did, but he and I are still happy where he is right now.

 

  And now that I look back on it, the thing that helped him to continue to succeed was that fact that whatever level he was playing at , he was successful at that level.  He enjoyed playing the game, he made good friends.  Some of his friends that he made in rec ball are not in the game now but they still keep in touch, they are still interested in his journey.

 

I guess the point I'm trying to make is make sure whatever level your son is playing, he is enjoying it. If he is enjoying the journey, then that should be enough for you.

His path might be rec league, it might be elite travel.  He might end up quitting at age 14 he might be a HOF'er  just make sure it's a positive exp.

 

 There is no right or wrong way.  If you want to play two sports in the summer, then play two sports. If that coach does not like the two sport idea, then don't play for that coach...  I feel that many times when a younger player say 10-14 is playing many sports its for many reasons. And he is likely trying to figure himself out.  It's not always about winning and losing. He might feel more comftable playing sport B , even though he is better suited for sport A .... it's a process... parents need to support not dictate. I guess I'm just getting old

 Great point JB. I think most don't start to experience what the article speaks of until HS. Hard to imagine a coach telling 12-13 year he needs to focus on one sport. My experience tells me that kids that play full time/year round same sport crash and burn and never see the collegiate field. There were 5 or 6 travel teams and a rec team in our small county. I can count on one hand the kids that are playing at the collegiate level. But at the time, most of those parents thought their kid would be one of them.

 

My kid still talks about how much fun his youth sports experiences were that included baseball, basketball, football & karate. Playing at the next levels past HS are extremely difficult. Fun is not a word you hear to often.

 

I know I'm old but when I was a kid growing up in Philly, we didn't have travel teams, sports training facilities and recuriting counsulars. Even so, kids made it to college. Guys got drafted and players went on to throw perfect games, no hitters and get to the Hall of Fame.

 

We played stick ball, pick up football games, threw rocks and ran around a lot. Know of which was organized by an adult!