The Race to Nowhere in Youth Sports

I dont get it either. What lesson?
Kids should not have to choose whixh sport they would rather participate in unless it is harmful to their health.

Ok - 'choices have consequences.'  I can agree with that - in general!

 

But I believe its mis-applied in this case.  The thing I cannot agree with is the coach making baseball #1 for 12 months of the year for 12-year olds.  I think its a disservice to the kids.  If its football season and 1 or 3 or 8 kids wanna play football - I say GREAT!!  I always encouraged that.  In fact, I know players came back with the cross-training benefits better athletes!

 

Lets talk about unintended consequences of this coach's rules.  One kid decided he wants to play football and accept the consequences.  How many of the other 14 chose not to play football/soccer/basketball/whatever because they were afraid of the consequences the coach imposed?  I betcha more than zero.  And for the one kid who apparently learned some lesson, why is he being told by some adult in position of power over him what sport should be #1?

 

How many kids on this team will be scared out of pursuing what they really love or really could be great at?  These are not good rules for 12-year olds IMO.

 

I don't get it.

Football is what 8 weeks?  Basketball 8 weeks?  The tourneys played during October-February when these sports are played are maybe 3, and none of them are during Spring. 

 

Why is it better to play a kid who hasn't been to practice because he made a choice, over a kid who has busted his rump at every practice?

Don't throw a 50lb bag of fertilizer on a seed of grass. Does that make sense? Introduce your son to the game. Foster an environment where the game and learning is fun. Let the fire burn and some coals develop before you throw a cord of wood on it. As he develops coals add a little wood. As he gets older and starts to grow assist him with good counsel. His talent, work ethic, determination, drive and love of the game will dictate what you can not dictate.

 

But  through all of this there needs to be balance. It doesn't matter if all he wants to do is baseball. That's not healthy. Its a recipe for disaster in many ways. Your the parent not his personal baseball instructor. When there is so much importance put on something at an early age even if its just perception then its reality to your child. 

 

 

The coach can run his team anyway he see's fit. Obviously some/most/all of the parents are in agreement with his style and approach. Right, wrong, or indifferent the parents have the choice to either agree with his basic rules or find another team with a "softer" approach. There are plenty of baseball coaches out there that welcome multi-sport athletes and and provide the schedule flexibility. Find the coach philosophy that fits your needs. To say that every coach has to be flexible to multi-sport athletes is a bit of a reach.

"The lesson my son took from it was that life is about choices, choosing what is important to you, and dealing with the consequences if there are any."

 

An alternative lesson from this is "buyer beware". 

 

If the coach won't let your son pursue his other loves, then he (you) should choose a different coach to play for.  Its taking what the sport/(s) will give you for as long as you can.

 

I generally found if your kid has any talent the coach will work with you rather then lose your kid to a competing team. 

Well we have a perfect example of the coach the artical was about.

I don't know that I read it that way. I've had, over the years, kids that were playing sports that overlapped baseball. My policy was always that it was fine. If you're playing soccer (for example), make what practices you can. Your playing time will suffer while playing two sports. I'm not taking time away from the kids who are at every practice and game. If the kid isn't playing or practicing the other sport, I expect him to be at my game, on the bench cheering on his teammates and being part of the team. I'll get you SOME playing time. As long as you're here when you can be, when your other season ends and you join us full time, there will be no punishment for having played another sport. You'll get all the playing time your talent and dedication justufy. Kids who do that know this when tey sign up with me and the other kids know that Johnny has always been part of the team and when he's back full time, he's going to be playing.

 

Kids should be expected to be able to play multiple sports, but they shouldn't expect to take playing time from the players who are at every practice and game. However, show up when you can and support the team and you won't rankle a lot of feathers when you come back full time.

THANK YOU!  That's exactly his philosophy which I guess I described poorly.  As stated above, the very first week football was over the kid played according to his skill level and there were no hard feelings from the coach.

 

I don't think it makes him a coach like in the article,he doesn't kick kids off the team if you play another sport.  In fact this article read "The best coaches used to be able to develop not only better athletes, but better people, yet it is getting hard to be that type of coach."

 

 

"Coaches, you need to wise up as well. You are the gatekeepers of youth sports, the people who play God, and decide who gets in, and who is kicked to the curb. You know the incredible influence of sport in your life, so stop denying it to so many others. Are you so worried about your coaching ability, or about the quality of the sport you love, to think that if you do not force kids to commit early they will leave? Please realize that if you are an amazing coach with your priorities in order, and you teach a beautiful game well, that kids will flock to you in droves, not because they have to, but because they want to!"

 

Isn't this discussion now again focused on an issue created by adults, but this time the coaches rather than the parents?  When our son was in grade school up to age 13-14, the concept of Fall baseball was, at most, an afterthought in our area of Northern CA., which is also a hotbed of baseball talent. The school year started with flag football, then to basketball, then to soxxer, then to baseball in around March, both in school and little league. In addition, our son swam 2-3 days per week year round.

I don't think it can be debated much that the conflicts and the issue of "specialization" forced at too early an age has arisen because of the effort to proliferate nearly every youth sport to a year round sport.  I certainly recognize many will take the view the proliferation came about because of the children loving the sport and wanting more to which I would note my grandson at age 2 talking about loving baseball because his Dad and Grandpa talk about it. 

Why do adult coaches create the year round sports to create the conflicts and then make demands that what they created takes precedence over the sport in season?  Just seems unnecessary to me.

Some of it is just supply and demand. At some point (especially in warm weather states) it dawned on somebody that a lot of the kids who played football after baseball season was over would be more interested in playing more baseball if it were available in the fall. Then winter followed suit. They just provided an opportunity for a market. Organizations turning into a situation where you play year round or you don't play at all are a whole different matter - an unintended, ridiculous byproduct. However, I don't think it is as common as the media often makes it out to be.

I gave the article a read. Some interesting views, some of which I can appreciate having gone thru  similar issues with my younger son. The author, Mr. O'Sullivan, and his organization Changing the Game, is proud to talk about this sports specialization "evil" issue. You can hire him to speak or buy his $ 47.00 dvd . 

I do not see this specialization as big a deal as Mr. O'Sullivan or some posters here mention. With my younger boy we chose a different soxxer coach who's priorities were different. He worked along with our baseball schedule. Not that big an issue in my opinion.

 

Wait until your players get older, you've spent a fortune and time and some football stud walks onto the team after football is over and takes his place.  Or the new college freshman plays while your upperclassman sits!

 

I cant tell anyone how to raise their child but I agree with Coach May. 

 

I worry about some of the stuff that is going on these days. I dont think that filming video of mechanics or looking up stats on PG is really all about what, "my son wants to do".  This all comes from the parents, the anxiety that their players will miss out on something or they sit up at night dreaming of their players on the ML field!  I understand because I was once one of those parents, but I know better now that all of that stuff meant NOTHING until he went to HS.  

 

I am a firm believer that there are way too many parents that are too involved with stuff that they don't have to be when the player is still young. They push their kids whether it be one or two sports, and then say its what their kids want. They actually believe this with good intentions but Coach May talks about the young child wanting to please their parents and sometimes doing things for the wrong reasons. They think they are good parents because they spend so much money on equipment and travel, lessons, etc.   I see it with my daughters BF and his 12 year old son and its just way too much,  he over worked a young body and the poor kid had to be on crutches for 6 weeks.  Lesson learned.  

 

While so many people think that things have changed they really haven't. Son played on teams where you could play another sport and teams where you could not.  

 

He sat when other guys joined the team, even for just a weekend tourney, what lesson do you supposed he learned at 12? I don't think that he cared less, we did, and our comments to son should never have been expressed. 

 

Good luck you all, you are going to need it!

That proved you and your son flexible, but IMO many parents arent like that, they have their kids on elite teams in elite programs and no way are they going to give that up!!!!

Coach May nailed it - please go read what he wrote again.  He has a long history of boiling things down to the simple truth.  And he's backed up by many years of coaching, scouting and parenting.  If I was relatively new to this site, I'd read everything that guy writes!!  Heck, I'm 10 years into this site and I try and read everything he writes.

Wait until your players get older, you've spent a fortune and time and some football stud walks onto the team after football is over and takes his place.  Or the new college freshman plays while your upperclassman sits!

THIS ^^^

 

Some of you have spent more than a little time defending and believing that those who show up and follow the rules should and will get the reps and the playing time.  I didn't expect it nor necessarily run things that way as I wrote above.  But the TRUTH is, if your son is gonna play on an elite HS or travel team, he will be subjected to a bigger, better, faster stud walking onto his team after football or basketball and taking your son's spot.  It happens in good/elite programs.  If you never see it happen, you may not be in one.

 

AND…if you think thats travel or HS politics, wait until he gets to college.  Wait until the stud recruit DOES IN FACT take your son's spot….even though he's never played a game in college….just because he is better or the coach thinks he's better. Or the upperclass pitcher who doesn't throw a pitch in Fall yet gets the weekend starting slot because he needs rest, or maybe his grades were suffering.  It has NOTHING to do with attendance.

 

My sons have experienced both sides of this coin.  They've both benefitted from it and they've suffered from it.  I never said a word.  THIS IS LIFE!!  They have to learn to deal with it.  I gave them a hug and pushed them back into the ring and told them to deal with it…go COMPETE!

 

The coach who is benching kids for playing football out of baseball season above is teaching very little about how elite athletics will be coached above him and he's dissuading/taking away good life experiences from 12-year old kids.  You don't punish middle school kids for being well-rounded.  Bad example for the others, let alone the football kid himself.

 

I'd find a different team.

To me it has to do with what season we are in.  Fall is for football.  Winter is basketball.  Spring/summer is baseball.  (you can add other sports as you wish).  For the multisport athlete, your number 1 priority should be the sport which is in season.  If you play football, you're going to miss some fall baseball (I know teams who play on Sundays so their football players can play).  Come baseball season, that is the number 1 priority.  You may miss some of the football/basketball workouts.  This should be encouraged.   

 

Very much all that justbaseball posted is true and will happen. He understands what I posted because he has been there like many of us and we are trying to tell you how it really is. Its not a coincidence we share the same stories. The best players will always play even those who dont work as hard at it as your son does.
Its a very bitter medicine to swallow but will make your player a better person for it.
All this stuff before HS is fluff.

If you re-read the post he didn't bench kids for playing football, he benched the kids who played football because they missed practice...which happened to be because of football.

 

I do believe if you miss a high school practice or a college practice because you held some other item in your life as priority (excluding family/illness) that the result would be the same....so I'm going to disagree that this coach is not teaching exactly how elite athletics will be coached above the 12u age.

 

Furthermore, I don't think us as parents are doing kids any favor by showing them it's okay to only kind of commit to a team...it is impossible to fully commit to both sports in one season, so why are we letting our kids believe it's okay to just half a$$ things?  Perhaps examples like this is why this generation feels they are owed things like money and houses simply for showing up and sort of trying, without committing 100% to their jobs..

He is highly discouraging other sports participation by having a penalty for attending other sports (football) out of baseball season.  I don't agree with that for this age group and IMO the lesson being taught is, 'Don't play other sports.'

These types of rules tend to encourage lying by kids (and sometimes their parents).  Where were you during practice last week?  'Uh, I was at my uncle's sick bedside.'  Been there, seen that.

 

IMO, this coach is more about HIS team than he is about teaching commitment.  Because you and I agree that commitment is important - I imagine he believes he's doing something good - I just believe it is being mis-applied in this case.

 

A number of years ago, an email from a travel/club soccer coach to her middle school player with very similar rules as your coach was forwarded to me by a good friend.  It laid out all the reasons why this player should commit 100% to this elite soccer team (above baseball) or be benched...or demoted to the lower team.

 

I forwarded it on to a friend I consider to be one of the best baseball coaches I've ever run across.  I didn't know it at the time, but he happened to be friends with Brandi Chastain and he showed it to her...that night!  I am not going to quote her, but lets just say that this world class soccer player had no empathy, whatsoever for this coach's position and gave the same advice I am offering here.  I've since seen Brandi along with some major league baseball players speak at middle school baseball clinics - they all have the exact same message, especially for this age group.

 

I'd find another team.

       
       
caco, I like you so I find it a little difficult to write this but in the Interest of honesty I must.  Note I am not back here t o debate lol.  Just help out.  We have one pitcher only on our varsity whose main sport is golf.  Since he is a PO to me it seems a little silly to demand he never misses anything for golf.  As long as he gets his sides in and he is there with his teammates as much as possible we are fine. And if he threw 95mph he probably wouldn't ever have to come to practice!!  Football teams do it all the time where maybe a soccer player is their kicker and shows up at his convenience to get his work done and then shows up to kick in the game.  There are even higher level travel teams who rarely or never practice and have kids who live hundreds of miles apart and meet at tournaments to play.  Usually then they will try to incorporate a little practice while they are there.  Athletics is not an equal opportunity situation.  The better you are the more flexibility you are given.   If you are marginal then maybe you lose playing time for missing practice.  Life isn't fair and neither is baseball.

At least in Texas football starts from the 2nd week in August and runs to mid November. State championships are played the 3rd week in December.  Also there is 7 on 7 football tournaments that go on during the spring into June.

No offense taken Jolietboy, and you are absolutely right with those type of fringe players.  At 12 there is no PO, the specific football player played catcher, pitcher and outfield.  Like I posted awhile back he was used for pitching some during this "benching" process.  We have 12 players, 3 have to sit.  We have 9 pitchers, 3 catchers, and 6 kids who can play outfield well...all other 11 kids showed up for practice those weeks so all other 11 played more than the kid who missed practice due to football. 

 

If the coach banned kids from playing other sports I could understand the line of reasoning that it is unfair.  Or if the coach gave a mandate that said if you play football you can't play ALL of fall with us...I could also understand.  But the first week the kid attended ALL practices like the other kids he played the same amount as the other kids.  This kid is actually one of our best pitchers...the coach didn't do what was best for the win, he did what was best to teach these boys consequences about commitment, and reward for those that put in the time and effort, so I think we are happy where we are for now.

Jolietboy,
You got it all in.
I forgot about the elite travel team that flys in the elite pitcher for one game, gives a uni and probably doesnt ask for a fee.
These are the realities of what your players will face.
Baseball is and never will be fair. Its not even on the ML level.  Imagine being a center fielder and in the off season they trade for another center fielder? Or they
bring in even MORE free agent guys?
Or the college coach who brings in a JUCO guy...same position as you!!!

In GA, at age 11/12, it runs from September-November, nothing in Spring.

You can defend this coach all you want to. That's fine and its natural to do so. However this coach is not trying to send a message about commitment. This coach is trying to send the message he and his team are the most important thing. During the season it's about commitment. During the off season it's about ego. This doesn't just happen one sport vs another. It also happens between school and travel coaches in the same sport. Some coaches work around it and some put their foot down. The ones that put their foot down always use the excuse it's about the team or its about commitment. It never is, its about the coach. I used to be that guy. Fortunately I coached long enough to realize it and stop. 

The football player isn't half assing anything. He playing football.

I think whats objectionable is not what the coach did but whether this scenerio teaches a lesson.
Young children dont need sports or coaches to teach commitment. Thats a parents job.
JMO

Isn't there, somewhere here, also a lesson to the kid who is at every practice and game and committed to improving thatt HIS commitment means something and that the guy splitting his time can't always expect to just swoop in and steal his playing time? While I can understand the argument that "that's the way life is - unfair," but is the point of this discussion how things ARE or how they SHOULD BE. If it's about how the world works then I would coach differently so that kids could be prepared for how unfair things can be. I'd probably parent differently also.

I think everyone is in agreement that there should be commitment to the team. However all out commit or be penalized at such an early age is where some disagree. Where we played rec baseball was a very small league. When we played districts we always 2 and out. I started a travel team when my son was 9 with players from the league so that we could play more, get better and compete in the district tournament. I got together with several friends that wanted to help and we put together a charter for the team. The charter stated the expectations of the coaches, players and parents. It also stated our reason we started the team which read in part, " To provide proper fundamentals and increase skills so that each player could play at the next level." That next level was middle school. It also stated, "If this team lost every game we play, but everyone makes the middle school team, this team will be a success".

We invited every kid in that age group and kept every kid that came to tryouts. We played in the fall and a few tournaments in the spring around the rec schedule. All practices and games where mandatory except for what we called special circumstances. This is where I'm gonna lose some of you. We felt that at the age we were going to run this team (9-12) that these kids should be allowed to be kids. Outside of homework and family commitments which would always be excused, the kids could also miss to go to a friends birthday party, to play other sports or any thing else a kid at that age wanted to do. That did not mean that they could miss practice or games because they didn't want to go but they could miss if it was something they wanted to do to have fun. The only thing the kid had to do was come to me at least a week before, look me in the eye and tell me why he wanted to miss a game or practice.I always said "go have fun". Every player was guaranteed play time, every played was guaranteed to play one position they wanted to play, outside of the positions we designated for them. Every player was guaranteed a spot on the team for as long as they wanted to play. We played local and kept the cost down to a couple hundred after uniforms.

I know that a lot of you may think I'm an idiot, but most kids on the team were below average in there skills. All but 1 made their middle school team and all but 2 made their high school team. 

With all that said, I would not run a team the same for players 15 up. Up to 14 it should be about fun, learning fundamentals and creating a love of the game. At that age the less talented kids will weed them self out, the more talented kids will progress and then go kick every ones butt. I have seen teams take the biggest, strongest and fastest kids 9-12 and travel every where and win a bunch of hardware. I just don't think it means anything. JMHO

Oops.  I forgot we were discussing 12 y.o.  I was referring to high school.

For the last 10 years or so and many times before that, Stanford has had at least one 2 way player-football and baseball. During football, they miss Fall baseball. During the Spring, they miss most of Spring football(although not all of it).  Nearly everyone has been a starter in football and in baseball, with Tyler Gaffney and Zach Haffpauir being the most recent examples.Who would suggest they are not committed to the sport in season or that an example should be set and they should sit because they missed either Fall baseball or Spring football.

In my view, this discussion is now focused on the coach, not the "commitment" of the player or the coach "teaching" the player "commitment."  To me, at 12 years old, the job of the coach is to be able to coach and teach each player in ways which work best for each player, not to use the football player to set his "example" to "enforce" not teach "commitment."  The coach could easily use the football player as a positive example for other members of the team rather than than current approach, which I view as quite negative.

I agree infielddad - and you reminded me that Stanford not only allows it - they encourage it - they celebrate it!

 

John Elway, Toby Gerhart, Toi Cook, John Lynch - are just a few more.  ALL were big contributors on both teams...no penalties on either.

BTW, Anthony Munoz was a 2-sport athlete at USC - part of a national championship baseball team...as a pitcher I believe.  Imagine facing that mammoth human being staring down at you from the mound! 

       
       

Inseason yes I agree offseason no. If the kid missed baseball practice for a spring football function I would have no problem with the coach benching him. Although at 12 I still wouldn't. If the other players passed the football player in ability because they are there working. I don't have a problem with it. Although if kids can miss offseason work and still be as good as the kids that attend offseason work than how effective is that offseason work in the first place. Offseason work is supposed to be about getting better.

Every coach on the planet wants there team and the sport they coach to be the top priority. When we project that onto our team it's about us. It's supposed to (especially at 12) be about the kids.

Maybe I'm missing something or the discussion has gone far beyond the situation as first presented. What I saw was a kid, during the time he was also playing another sport, losing playing time WHILE they overlapped. He didn't lose his playing time when he was a fulltime commitment and wasn't told he'd lose playing time during the regular spring season when he was a single-sport athlete. I don't see the problem nor do I see that as discouraging multi-sport participation.

 

As to college two-sport athletes like at Stanford. Matt Jones used to play both football and basketball at the U of Arkansas. However, he didn't play during the first semester when the sports overlapped. However, he got plenty of PT once football was over. that's pretty much how it works with the Stanford athletes as well. It's also how it worked at Florida State with Charlie Ward. He didn't play basketball in November and December. He came on the tema in January after the Bowl games.

I don't really agree with this point of view.  Parents can only do so much, and kids have a tendency to respect what their coaches say and teach.  Commitment is exactly what I want my son's coach to help teach him.

Yup, you got the situation right, and yes SEVERAL people feel this is inappropriate behavior at age 12.  The general consensus appears to be that at age 12 "commitment" is a flexible term if it involves the child missing practice to have fun/be a kid.  This includes birthday parties, football practice, or any other event that children do as long as the coach was given ample warning.

 

  As for the kids who DO show up and give it their all every practice to earn their tourney spot...well many people seem to think that has little to no merit because life isn't fair and the better kid should/will play regardless of whether or not they have been to practice. 

 

Personally I was hoping at 12 things would be a bit less cynical than to bring the life isn't fair concept in, but that does seem to be the consensus roothog.

When did playing time become a participation trophy? Go to the offseason practice and become better than the kids that don't. Then take their PT.

I don't see that it is, but I also don't think you can find a college or high school program in the country where showing up for practices and games is "optional" regardless of talent. keck, you don't see that in the pros, either.

I think the issue is the level of "commitment" required for out of season activity.  Why do you play fall baseball?  Obviously, to win that ever elusive Fall Championship Trophy. 

 

Or do you play in the fall to develop skills.  Play a different position.  Try out some new pitchers.  See some live pitching. 

 

If you're going for the championship, then by all means bench the kid because he harming the team because he isn't committed.   

There is no fall trophy.  This is travel ball, not rec ball, and about as high level as you can get at age 12...paid coach, speed and agility training, position specific workouts, and an at home regiment for Winter on top of 3 indoor team practices a week. 

 

We play fall ball to iron out the kinks of who is playing what position so that their winter training is geared more towards strengthening those particular areas and the coach can fill any holes that are perceived in roster.  This isn't a volunteer dad and a couple of buddies.  Is it high school level, goodness no.  But our son tried out for, and we pay for, an elite team to get away from the hugs and compliments coaches that frankly weren't providing the fundamentals needed to get onto the high school team in our area.  We expected the kids to have to earn their spot on the field, and we all understood that if you skipped any practice (baring medical/once in a lifetime family events) that your playing time would be affected.