I know every situation is different yet the same but this seems even more different that I've read anywhere else. My son plays soccer as a second high school sport to baseball. He is a late bloomer that wants to play college baseball and is on track to potentially play some level. Not sure where that might be yet but he is a pretty decent athlete. He has a soccer coach holding a grudge against him for a perceived wrongdoing that I did to two of his sons as a baseball coach 2 years ago. I could go in to a lengthy explanation of what happened and what is happening but I'm not sure its even needed at this point. This post will be long enough. I'm not sure what else to do at this point or if I should even do anything. My wife is about to blow up at him. I've instructed my son to keep working hard and communicate and ask what to do and if he's doing it right. That worked for one game and was told he was starting the next game because he improved the things the coach wanted. We were surprised to hear that. got our hopes up we'd moved on, but then he got 10 mins to start then was done for most of the rest of the game. (It should be noted here that the momentum of the game shifted for the worse after that 10 min. my son was not the only to be subbed though. It just happens that my son tends to work well with some player that get whole games of time). Then the next practice he approached the coach and asked why his time was cut short he said "well I know your primary sport is baseball and that was a very physical game and didn't want to get you hurt for baseball." How kind of him. So he didn't care if the primary basketball player he put in got hurt. ugh. My son was dumbfounded and didn't know what to say and I told him that he needed to explain if he was worried about getting hurt he wouldn't of signed up to play. He did that. And the coach responded with a selfish excuse....err I mean explanation about how he would feel bad if he put him on the field and he got hurt (Another player got a concussion that game). So now he has nothing to work on to earn more time and is just getting excuses which basically confirms the grudge as he's now just getting excuses. Son started last game to his surprise (wasn't told he would be until the pregrame announcer said his name) and was out after 10 min again. got back in the last 5 min of game. How do you have varsity starters get the some of the least amount of time on the team and not have a legitimate explanation to the player?
To compound the frustration, we've been told by numerous parents that they don't understand why he's getting treated this way or why he's not on the field helping the team more. and his teammates are making comments that they don't understand what is going on either. One team captain has said my son is the best player he's ever seen in the one position and doesn't understand why he's not there more. It sounds like my rose colored glasses are off, but I must be missing something because it looks like the coach is clearly hurting the team's chances of success by not playing my son. Its one thing to be a parent and think your son should get more playing time over other players for whatever reasons we parents come up with, It's a whole nother thing in my mind to have other players and parents and assistant coaches confirming those thoughts.
Is there anything else I can do but just keep telling son to play hard with the time he does get and let the coach crash and burn the team? I thought about offering to buy the coach lunch and talk about how his selfish motivations and emotional decisions have impacted the team in negative way....but I don't think I can do that solely on the fact that talking to this coach has been met with a brick wall by many more before me. This guy has run many of coaches out of their positions and is now in the hot seat that he criticized about so many before him. Its really sad to see how the programs have been degraded and so many other players do not support him for their own reasons. Maybe I'll just walk up to him and say "thanks for helping me teach my son how life is not always fair and that he's holding the team back for his selfish motivations, its making my son an even better competitor which will only help him succeed later on in life." Too much? Yeah probably. Vent over.